Crying it out??

[jenkaye21]

Ok, so I posted before about the bedtime battles i've been having w/ Cooper.  Things have not really improved.  He will go to bed most nights fairly easily.  BUT-------------
At some time in the middle of the night, he wakes, and he cries.  The ONLY way to get him back to sleep is for me to lay down w/him (I have a cot in his room, from when I was nursing). When I do this, he goes to sleep within 10 minutes or so.  But when he go to put him back in the crib, he *immediately* wakes and screams bloody murder!!  And I have to start the whole process over.  uugh

Last night, I thought, 'I wonder how long it would take for him to go to sleep on his own if I let him cry??'  Well, 2 hours later, I gave in.  Seriously; 2 STRAIGHT HOURS of top-of-the-lungs shreiking, pausing only to breathe.  Finally, I went in, gave him a drink of milk (his throat *had* to hurt), changed his diaper.  I was determined NOT to get him out of his crib.  Instead I sat down on the floor beside it, where he could see me, and quietly shushed him, sang to him, etc, then said I was going to sleep and got perfectly still and quiet.  Well, he WAILED and reached his arms out like he was pleading for his life.  IT was quite pathetic, really.

At this point, I think I am totally being played by my 1 y/o son.  He wants to sleep w/ Mommy (which has never happened, except for brief periods of time when I was nursing, not all night ) and he knows how to get what he wants.  

MY plan at this point is to STOP getting him out of his bed at night.  Period.  If necessary, I will go in and sit w/ him until he goes to sleep, but that is it.  I am determined not to give in.
Has anyone else had a situation like this??  And how did you resolve it??  I feel horrible for letting him cry, but I *must* change/break this habit!!

[jenkaye21]

Thanks, all, for your comments and advice. @ladybug, I do very similar to what you described.  We follow a specific routine, too, and going to bed has been quite smooth.  Most nights he doesn't wake, but when he does, it is still a real problem to get him back to sleep.  First I wait to see if the crying stops on its own; then I go in and soothe; finally, I have been sitting/laying on the floor near the crib so he knows i'm there until he finally goes to sleep.  It is a pain, but the first time it took 2+ hours; last night, it took less than 45 min.  We are getting there. :)  And he doesn't cry (much) while I am in the room, he used to wail and just frantically reach for me, now he just watches me like a hawk to make sure i'm still there.  

[eternidad200]

I am sorry you are going through this, is rough having to star all over again. EVry baby is different and maybe he is teething, and he is not feeling well, gas pain or something. James is usually prtty good at night sleeping the whole time and I know when he gets like this, waking up and crying is bc he is not well, usually teething.
Have you read the no cry sleep solution. I never had the strength to let James cry but if you think that it might work out for you give it a try, otherwise think this is just a momentary issue and he will go back to sleep again soon. It i scrazy at times i felt like I was going out of my mind but we hanged in there and he went back to sleep through the night again.
Sorry girl hope it gets better.

[ladybugbob1029]

Well, I finally did Crying It Out with Cash.  I started with going in after 5 mins then 7 then 10 etc on the first night.  The next night I started with 7 min then 21 then 45.  And then just continued increasing the time.  He usually gave up sometime during the 45 minute wait, and it took about a week for him to get it.  He was waking constantly in the middle of the night as well as when i would first lay him down.  He knew if he cried I would come.  So, I still responded but not on his terms - on mine.  I didn't pick him up from the crib when i went in either.  I would lay him down, give him his pacifier, cover him up, rub his back and shhhh him and then walk out.  When I walked out it always resulted in screaming tears, but less and less each time.  Hang in there.  You will know what is best for you and your ltitle one.  They are all so different you just have to find what works for you.  He does great now and very rarely wakes at night.  If he does I know he is uncomfy so I go in and rock him alittle and he is back out again.
The other thing that worked is using a strict night time routine (again this worked for Cash, but may not work for you).  At 730 we get a bath followed by laying on a pallet in his floor watching cartoons while I lotion him down, groom him, and dress him for bed.  Then we get in the rocking chair for about 10 minutes and then I lay him down.  I follow this to the letter every night and it really works for us.  We have been doing it so long now that Cash knows what comes next!

[ArmyPrincess819]

Sorry it can be really hard. I wouldn't suggest letting him cry for longer than 5 mins. I know it's hard because you have already gotten him in the habit of lying down with him but you have to let him be is there anyway of laying him down on the cot with blankets on the floor incase he falls out or do you have bed rails...Of cours be sure there is nothing he can get into and that there is a gate up in the door way. Remember he is teething and it can make them very very out of sorts Jeremy has been crying out in the middle of the nigth too. Sometimes you gotta get up with them it doesn't end once they turn 1, 6 7 or even 8. Kids are kids and like us there are just some nights they are restless and don't want to go to sleep. Jeremy doesn't nap much so by 7 it's usually quite simple to get him to bed if he fights us some nights we just keep holding him when he tries to get down and crawl around we put him back in his crib this can go on for a 1/2 hr some nights or not at all it depends on how tired he is the more exhausted the more diffacult he is to go to sleep. If you can you got to pick a time of night and just stick with that and begin trying to get him to sleep if you can have your dh help too.  I give Jeremy a bath every night that seems to help as well as a bottle while we r getting him to sleep. I try to run when Jeremy cries out at night I rub his back and give him his binky the longer it takes me to get to him the more he wakes up. I literally run lol. Thank goodness for nite lites. Try a few of these ideas and if no success talk to your pediatrician and see what they suggest mine is awesome I can ask him anything anytime and he's always there with helpful hints! It's quite challenging at times but don't forget they are getting bigger so the world is more exciting and they don't want to miss a beat! Good luck hun!
Hugs,
AP