Pregnancy: July 2010 Babies Community
Anyone having extreme fear of miscarriage right now??
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Anyone having extreme fear of miscarriage right now??

I've gone through a lot to get pregnant and finally turned to IVF which resulted in me getting pregnant. I am now 5w2d and cannot get over this fear of miscarriage. Is it normal to worry constantly about losing your baby? I think part of it is that it has been so difficult for me to get pregnant that I don't know how I'll cope if I do miscarry. My husband has been supportive but is realistic and says that it's 50/50 that something wil happen.

My first u/s is next Thursday and I lay awake at night worried that they won't see a heartbeat, etc. I'm trying to relax because I know worrying isn't good, but is it normal to feel this way? I feel like I just can't be happy and can't even talk about the future of my pregnancy w/o having my "disclaimer" of "it's still early, and anything can happen... "

Just wondering if any of you feel this way and how you cope w/the fear.... TIA!!!

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19 Comments Post a Comment
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589816_tn?1332980371
This is my first pregnancy since my m/c and we found the same thing was wrong at my first u/s. So now we are having to wait until next week for another u/s to see if the baby's grown any or not. It was terrifying before then...and for the first few days after that. Now I have convinced myself to enjoy every second I have with my baby either way..it wouldn't be fair for me to not give this baby my all due to my own fears. I hope that helps a little. I'll keep you and your little one in my thoughts and prayers..Everything will be okay and hopefully when you see that little heartbeat you're fears will start to go away :D
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Avatar_f_tn
Awww... thanks so much for the kind words. I'm sorry to hear about your m/c and now that you're having to go through some scary times again. I think you have a great attitude. You're right that we need to enjoy the moments we have with the baby either way. It's just so hard not to think about all of the "what ifs" 24/7!!!

I hope that all goes well with you at your appt... what day is it next week? You'll have to keep us posted on how things go.

Thanks again!!
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Avatar_f_tn
Im with you.... I worry about it alot myself. I know I shouldnt be concerned but I dunno I am. I think every pregnant woman worries about it but you cant let it consume you. Im having an u/s on friday and Im scared to death about it. Im trying to work on positive thinking. I think thats all we can do really. Good luck!
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Avatar_f_tn
Thanks for your message! Working on the positive thinking thing sounds like the best thing to do! It is hard because even though you tell yourself a million times not to worry, your mind plays tricks on you!!

Good luck at your u/s on Friday!! You'll have to keep us updated on how things go. I'm sure everything will be great!

Take care.  
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924332_tn?1284577518
I do have fears. I'm a little over 9wks and i have an appt today. Last time i was pregnant it ended in miscarriage and i went for my appt at 9 wks and no heartbeat was found. Its normal to be scared. I wish you luck and a healthy pregnancy.
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Avatar_f_tn
Princessa745,

When you last miscarried, was the 9 wk appointment your first one?  I'm just wondering if they heard the heart at first, but then it was no longer beating when you went back in?

I'm also very scared of miscarriage, and it's mainly because of how long it took me to get pregnant.  It took me about 18 months, and I ended up getting pregnant naturally after failed IVFs and IUI's.  

I'm 8 weeks, 2 days today, and really nervous.  
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1111099_tn?1273603653
I am in the same boat as you!  Just found out I was pregnant on 11/19/09 after going through IVF.  My first appt is 12/2/09 and I am terrified!  I want to tell everyone, buy things, all of it, but I'm so afraid of all of the "what if's" or "jinxing it".  12 weeks can't come soon enough!
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Avatar_f_tn
I really think the nervousness happens for most every woman in our situation. I feel like Im in some weird holding pattern until I find out everything is ok. Then maybe Ill be able to breathe and make plans and whatnot.

Ill definately let you guys know how my appt goes on friday. Im still soooo nervous!
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1111099_tn?1273603653
I just told my husband I was going to buy another pregnancy test...just to make me feel better :)
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Avatar_f_tn
I am completely sided with you. I had a miscarriage 3 months ago after months of IUI. The miscarriage on its own practically ruined me emotionally and caused me to essentially hibernate myself which caused a lot of tension in my family and friend relationships. I didnt even think of trying to concieve (conceive) again because i couldnt put myself threw that pain anymore, so i turned to the gym, got myself in optimum health, started making travel plans, plans for the future, and BAM im pregnant, naturally. Im now 6 weeks and 3 days. from the moment i found out i couldnt be happy because i already assumed the worst was going to happen. i decided not to tell anyone (although it slipped to my parents and my husbands parents and close friend :) but not a day goes by that i can put my mind at rest with the fear of losing the baby again. I decided to get my Hcg tests every week so i can track it that way and have some peace of mind- at 6wks exactly my hcg levels was over 45,000 and that alone was enough to ease me.
ultrasound is next week and im excited, nervous, dreading, hoping, praying. Although this sounds slightly hypocritical given im commenting on this site to you, i found when i stopped my obsessive internet question google searching over countless websites (we all do it). ive been able to relax a little more. stress is no good, and the baby feels what we feel. there is absolutely nothing we can do to resist the enevitable but maintain good health. so enjoy it, enjoy every minute of it. and try to relax ;)
good luck on your ultrasound, i pray for a strong heartbeat
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760797_tn?1303268140
I did a second test, too. Just to make sure I was still pregnant :)  I'm like all of you, so nervous but wanting to enjoy this. I agree it is like being in limbo waiting to hear the heartbeat. My last pregnancy ended in a loss  and I didn't find out until my 16 week appointment. I had already heard the baby's hb several times and everything seemed to be going ok. I guess that is why I am so scared. I am constantly obsessing over my symptoms...they seem to come and go, some days they are more prevalent than others. I'm sure we'll all get through this scary time and hopefully we will be ablt to enjoy being pregnant!
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Avatar_f_tn
Sounds like we are all in the same boat here... so many of you have also been through a lot!!! I wonder why they don't do weekly betas or more ultrasounds, especially since thigns are so iffy in the first trimester!

I am glad that we can all be terrified together, but sorry that we can't just enjoy this time right now. I feel just like you KimB19... I want to buy things, etc, but don't because of fear that I'll "jinx" something.

Can 12 weeks come soon enough?! And, even then you're not totally in the clear, but I know the chance for m/c is much lower.

Let's all keep each other posted on how our ultrasounds go. Sounds like we all have some coming up here in the next week or so!!!

Oh, and I do admit... I took a pg st this a.m. because I had a terrible dream last night and it luckily my test was postive. But, it was also one of those super sensitive ones! I wish I could get weekly betas... Supermommytobe... you are very lucky that your dr. let you do that!!!!
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589816_tn?1332980371
Don't feel bad..I have mine lined up in the order that I took them just to make sure they were getting darker LOL I wish they had ones that did tell us the beta!! Then we wouldn't all be as stressed out. I'm glad we all get to worry together too though :P

My u/s is day after tomorrow and I'm starting to get nervous.
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Avatar_f_tn
Haaa.. too funny! I did that for my first few tests...lined them up to make sure the line was getting darker. I even have a picture of it in my profile!! :)

Good luck tomorrow!! Please post and let me know how things go. I'll be sending good thoughts your way!! :)
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924332_tn?1284577518
It wasn't. It was my 2nd Ob appt, but i had seen the heart beat at 6wks 3days and it was fine. Then at that ob appt i should have been 9wks and no heartbeat was found.

With my current pregnacy i had an ultrasound and only saw sac and yolk, went two weeks later and had a heartbeat. I went yesterday and i was 9wks 3days and my dr found the heartbeat right away so everything was great.
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Avatar_f_tn
I think someone did the tie in for me about why Im so scared of the u/s. 14 yrs ago I found out I was pg then I started spotting alot. The OB at the time told me everything was fine, its normal, just try to rest. I did all of that and at my 7wk appt I finally had an u/s which revealed a molar pregnancy (I had a mc but my body started growing a tumor in its place with the placenta). I had to have an emergency d and c the next day because I started to hemorrhage.  

Im 7 wks today and my u/s appt is for tomorrow. Maybe I have some ptsd or something about this time frame? Im scared to get my hopes up that everything is ok although I have no sign that anything is wrong at all now. I have no cramping, bleeding, spotting, nothing but yet Im still worried. *sigh*
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1102290_tn?1278503553
I am 6 w 4d and have my 2nd u/s tomorrow and I m so scared tthat there is not going to be a heartbeat.  I have convinced myself of the worst... just in case.  I have been horribly mean to my husband all week because I am so scared and I don't want to scare him by telling him I am scared..UGH.  Hopefully I am just hormonally crazy ....

forestfairie.. my u/s is at 9am EST tomorrow... pls let me know how yours goes... I already saw the sac and all at my 5w1d u/s.  Sleeping tonight will be impossible!!!  
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924332_tn?1284577518
Its okay to feel that way. I had a miscarriage in march and at my 9wk appt they could not find the heartbeat. So as you can imagine on monday i was 9wks  3 days and was terrifed but everything was fine and i heard the heartbeat. So both you girls try to stay positive.
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1102290_tn?1278503553
My first m/c I saw the heartbeat at 5w5d and when I went in for my 8w appt there was none... 2 pregnancys after some complications.. just for some reason I am so worried about this one.. maybe because it is my new husbands first pregnancy EVER
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