Obsessed Mom? (Kind of long)

[gmichelle94]

So , I'm 22 , this is my first baby (10 weeks) and I'm due mid February . I'm having troubles with my Mom suddenly becoming extremely pushy now that I'm pregnant . She's constantly telling me what I should and shouldn't be doing , telling me stories about her/my sister's pregnancies and how things went wrong . She's asking about staying with us a week after the baby is born (which is perfectly fine) but my husband's Mother is coming as well and my Mother doesn't want her around . She even went so far as to suggest my husband stay home and come see the baby the day after they're born because she wants to be there .
I'm just so frustrated , I've never had a good relationship with my Mother , I thought this could possibly bring us closer , and I don't want her to miss out on possibly having her new grandchild in her life , but I just can't wrap my head around why she's so
adamant on taking over my pregnancy and labor ?

[RockRose]

When she suggested your husband stay home for the delivery,  that's when she crossed an irreversible line.  It's time to cut the cord,  honey,  and tell your mother that your husband is your primary partner and you'll be inviting her to things when you want.  

[willi95]

At the end of the day , this is YOUR LIFE , Your child . She can only give you suggestions and tell you her opinion and how she feels . But at the end of the day it is YOUR and ONLY YOUR decision to make the final say so . If you don't want her to do something or be a certain way , you need to be honest and real with her and tell her you are going to do things the way YOU want them to go . She won't have a choice but to either respect your wishes , Or be mad and upset and she probably will just ignore you for a while . But if that' happens so be it at the end of the day YOU ARE GROWN AND THIS IS YOUR TIME YOUR JOURNEY YOUR PREGNANCY YOUR LIFE YOU WILL BE IN CHARGE OF , she can only give you suggestions she can not actually take your baby and raise them herself so you need to cut the ties that she thinks she runs everything as soon as possible . I have my own issues with my mom and I am only 21 , my mom wants me to put her last name on my child certificate just because my man and I aren't married , but newsflash this is my baby she didn't  have sex with me and get me pregnant so why would I not use my mans last name ? Grandparents are CRAZY , and although they are INTIMIDATING , you have to stand up to them your going to be that child's mother their gonna come to you for everything they need , not her . So you need to be the one who is in control of everything , let her give you suggestions but you do not let her make your decisions for you . My mom will be mad and upset at me about me not using my last name on my child but that's the thing , she is MY and my Mans child's Him and I Are this little girls parents , Not my mom . It may be hard to stand up to our parents but IT MUST BE DONE . we aren't kids anymore we are going to be parents , so we need to do what we feel is right for our children , not what is right for our parents .. If you get what I mean . I wish you luck with your journey and luck with your mom , just do what you want to do and what you feel is right don't let her run your show you are the star of your show you pull the strings , not her .

[baby1209]

Those were your words. What is it that you want to hear?

[baby1209]

Because you are letting her take over tell her what you want