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Separating while pregnant
My partner & I have been having a rough time for awhile. I made that critical error of thinking things would improve with baby number 2. Well surprise surprise things have reached breaking point. I'm 18 weeks pregnant & my partner & I hate each other. There's been no affairs or anything like that.  We never lived together before we had our first child who wasn't planned & since then the whole thing has felt very forced. I'm 35 yo in a loveless relationship with a beautiful baby girl & another on the way. This is definitely not what I expected for my life. To make things worse I'm on the other side of the world from home & don't have a single family member or friend for support. I want to go home but it's very complicated. So stressed it can't be good for the baby. I need your comments of support & strength to get through this.
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I've learnt that my partner of 4 years has cheated and impregnated the mother of his first child, I'm 12 weeks pregnant and I'm so devastated I even thought of committing suicide it's so painful to deal with this and now I found out he went to her yesterday I don't know what to do please help me I'm 26 and this is my second baby and I'm not even happy I love but I can see he doesn't respect me and our relationship please help.
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I know how you must be feeling & it's horrible, like the world is ending. Time is the only healer of wounds like these. You must be strong for the sake of your children. Imagine their life without you, it's unthinkable. Keeping your cool & dignity is the only thing you can take away from this. Run into the arms of the people tgat love you. You need them x
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I'm in a brink of a break down
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Stay calm. Do you have a close family member or friend you can call? If so call them.
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I do have but I'm so hurt, I cannot actually talk about it to my family or friends because is so hard for me to talk about it out loud, and my big problem is that I actually really love him
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I know that feeling sometimes saying it out loud makes it more real & if you love someone you want to protect them. But not saying anything won't make it disappear & will only make you feel worse. I told my bf what was going on after years of hiding it & it was such a relief. You don't need to announce it to the world. Just call one close friend & tell them you need them.
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The best thing for you now is to compose yourself, take it as if nothing happened, make yourself happy, never let it bothers you because of your own life and kids. Nobody can talk to you than yourself. Have a nice time.
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Thank you so much, it helps to talk to you, I will try to open up to my mother about it. I'm also concerned about my baby I've been under a lot of pressure and stress I have not been able to eat or drink anything. I just hope my big is ok.
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I hope my baby is ok, I'm really glad I wrote here because I would have lost it, I'm glad there are people like you, who can help people like me feel better
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It's comforting to know that there are women all over the world struggling with similar issues. We should support each other x
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Your story is so sad, Ndaloy. I want you to know that you can find true hope, joy, and peace in knowing Jesus, even if your circumstances never get better (but I hope they do get better). Run to Him. Seek Him by praying and reading the Bible. He is all you need and He loves you.
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You can talk to me if it would help
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Thanks I'm really lost atm. I don't know what to do. I want to run away but if I do its considered child abduction. Breaking the law isn't an option. I just want to be close to my family and friends.
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Yes I would really like to
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I am so sorry that you are experiencing such heartache and loneliness. I wish I could make it go away for you, even though I don't know you. I want to encourage you that there is hope for continuing on, and you can find this hope only in Jesus Christ. He made you; He cares about you. 1 Peter 5:7 urges us to cast "all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you." Call on His name! Seek to know Him through reading the Bible. The book of John is a good place to start. No one and nothing on earth can give us ultimate satisfaction, but Jesus can and does satisfy.
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Thank you so much, I'm going to church tomorrow and I know I will find comfort and healing as time goes
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Today I woke up and found 12 missed calls from my cheating boyfriend and 1 sms that tells me not to call him again because I didn't answer his phone calls at night, that has brought me to tears because I don't think he understands the kind of damage he has done to me, I'm so hurt.
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I don't know what to do, should I answer his phone calls or should I just let my phone ring. I don't know what to say to him, all I know is that I'm broken.
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You've received a lot of good advice and a lot of support on this forum. It really does help to talk to others so I hope you keep posting here.
My nephew kind of did the same thing. He and his girlfriend had just had a baby when he got another girl pregnant. I asked him, what in the world were you thinking?!! He wasn't, and I guess he was just to lazy to use condoms. I see this happen a lot and it's such a shame because children should have both of their parents in their lives when ever possible. I've also seen a lot of single mothers who are wonderful and do a great job on their own.
If you become involved in the church you were going to yesterday maybe you can talk to the preacher. They're there to talk to people about anything.
Can I ask what your living situation is? I'm asking because if you're not living with your mom you may want to think about going home for awhile so she will be there any time you need her.
Please make sure you eat, drink lots of water and take your vitamins. Your baby deserves the best environment so he/she can grow and be healthy. Don't let this guy make you sick and make you feel like you want to take your life.
Keep posting okay. We're here to listen and help anyway we can.
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Thank you so much, I really got a lot of good advice and that has helped me get through today much better than yesterday, and I'm slowly accepting that I might have to do this on my own, thank you so much i will keep on writing. I live close to my mom and she comes often, she spent the night last night to help me. Thank you
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You're very welcome. I'm so glad to hear you have your mom for support. I was married with my first and only child but I still depended on my mom for so many things while I was pregnant.
I'm also glad you found this forum. Th members here are wonderful, caring, and many have been through what you're going through.
Have you talked to your boyfriend yet? He does have a responsibility to your baby and to the other woman's baby.
I wish some men would just stop and think about what they're doing. The women can suffer and so can the children when something like this happens.
Keep posting and lean on your mom for support. You're going to get through this because you already love your unborn baby.
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I have talked to him, and he knows his responsibilities to both babies, I'm trying to focus on myself and my baby because I've been in and out of the clinic and have lost so much weight because of him so, I Jst want to forget about him
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I'm so glad to hear you're putting yourself and your baby first. I can't imagine how upset you are. There are a lot of single mothers who do a wonderful job raising their children on their own. It's your decision to let him see your baby or not. I hope he will at least pay child support. He owes that to his baby. I hope you'll start putting on weight. Make sure to take your prenatal vitamins, okay.  
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