No support from boyfriend...

[breatheselina]

I feel like my boyfriend doesn't care about the pregnancy... I'm 5 weeks. He doesn't talk about it and acts like nothing has changed. I love him so much. I'm just worried. We are very young he is only 19 and I'm 17. What do i do to help make him talk?

[cher01]

I agree he is young and to some extent it hasn't t fully registered especially if he had other plans for his life than starting a family. Am a mature mum and thought was done on the babies side and was ready to start my next phase of life,  then bam!  Learnt was 14 weeks along. Spend 2 months numb and having out of body experience and am a woman. But also remember men and women are different on these things. I notice with my husband of more than 20 years together,  he does not say anything at all. Let alone touch my belly - our baby can be felt now when it moves) . I have to take his hand and place it on my belly - he does not talk about baby unless I start the talk, neither does he understand that we have wacky hormones coursing through our bodies and sometime we need the assurance that we are ok.  I have heard of dads who are more excited but I have learnt to accept that my hubby is different but will still love his kid. Just be gentle with him and find out where he stands - don't rush him but make him understand what you are going through and your expectations of him. H

[adgal]

This is probably quite a shock to him.  And given that he is not the one carrying the pregnancy, probably not quite real yet.  And I can tell you that this is not uncommon in men even in planned pregnancies.  My husband was much the same way.

As Gordon said, give him time.  Encourage him to attend Dr.s appointments and ultrasounds with you.  And read up on the importance of dad in a child's life.  I just did a workshop on it ( I work in social services field) and the differenc in a childs life with an involved dad is mind boggling.  Help him to understand how very important he is.  But do it slowly, ease into it.  Hopefully he comes around.

[GordonBaby]

Give him some time to come around. You guys are young and I'm sure its a lot to take in. If he doesnt come around in a few weeks I would try to talk to him, if he still has no interest then ask him if he really wants to be around for you and the baby. Don't crowd him but dont let him neglect you either. I'm sure its difficult for the bboth of you. If he still has no intention of being a man about it all, then maybe you may be doing mommyhood on your own which is also okay.