Venting... baby shower

[CourtBeck]

My family is really upsetting me about my baby shower. They say I have too many people on my guest list for them and they don't have money for that. They are comparing me to my sister's shower. She only invited our family and  1 friend. I have my family my child's father's family my friends and Co workers. It's not my fault that I'm more sociable and friendly than she was. Ughhh I just don't know what to do. My sister said oh you'll have a shower just not all the people and things you want. I don't think I'm being ungrateful but Geesh. Sorry ladies had to vent somewhere

[Piggies__]

I had multiple showers. So maybe just have the one with your family (with your family invited only) .. One with your husbands family, and one with co workers and friends.. At that rate you will get all sorts of things!! Lol :)

[figaro08j]

U should pitch in.  Am throwing my own shower cause no on has offered :( U can go ahead and spend a lil money to have your perfect day.

[Sxl0072412]

Cut the family one down to just family shower
Then host something in your own at a local chilis(whatever semi casual restaurant) for about 10-15 girls where you can buy appetizers 60$) & everyone can buy their own lunch if they wanted. & you could reuse the family babyshower decorations for the rest of the showers you end up having.
I had a huge babyshower (without actually calculating people it just ended up being that way) it was good/bad. There were not enough tables or chairs that was embarrassing and I hardly got to actually talk to anyone because I was so busy trying to sit/greet/take pictures but I did get lots of gifts. Anyway We had tostadas bean cheese lettuce Tomatos. I know for a fact my next shower will ever cut in half and way more intimate.

[RockRose]

Sounds like your family wants to host a family shower for you,  with maybe a few very good friends.

Since you're really sociable,  and have a lot of friends that you can't face cutting from the guest list,  they'll host other showers for you.

[eesscott]

I agree with what everyone else is saying. You either need to cut down your list or have multiple showers. Host your own for the people who don't make the cut, if you really want.  You're the guest of honour.... gotta act like it and be grateful they are hosting the shower for you.

[ALR2014]

I agree somewhat with everyone. Yes they are paying but it's ur day why make u a baby shower if it ain't about you N who u want there.

[nmprice09]

I personally think you are being rude in not cutting down your list after they have told you they didn't have the money. A couple years ago I offered to throw a baby shower for a cousin. When I went over to her house to get the list there was 80 people on it. I had a panic attack because my husband and I could not afford to throw a party that big, we were trying to save to buy a house and our oldest was going to be turning 1 in a couple months. I went to her and asked if she could cut it down to about half, she then informed me that she actually had to add more to it. About 10 more and it wasn't her only shower, more like it was going to be her 4th for just first baby. I then asked if we could have it at her house (she has a huge yard) since the guest list was so huge. I was basically told no. She had about 2-3 friends willing to help, but would not say if they were willing to help pay or just help. I ended up allowing myself to get pushed out of hosting it. It doesn't matter if you feel you should have more because of what ever you are not hosting/throwing it yourself and need to respect that they said they can not afford a party that size. I can tell you from experience that it was not easy and they did not want to tell you that.

[Pray4me2015]

OK how about you and the father chip in or change the format of this shower. Make it a potluck. Everyone bring their favorite dish.Pintrest invites that you make or even better E-vites that save paper and money. For party favors try pint rest for ideas and order from a bulk supplier. Maybe if you order early enough you can catch a great deal from discountmugs or Orientaltrading.

[fagi4ka]

Yeah, I agree. You cant expect them to pay for it if they are not comfortable or dont have the money. Its a bit selfish on your part. You should either compensate them or do a more lowkey shower.
Maybe get dollar store invites that you ll sign or print on yourself, same goes for decorations.. Also, you can just do sweets instead of a full blown banquet. Have shower at your family home too vs renting a banquet  hall.

[Miyu19]

The recent baby showers I've been to were potlucks. So maybe that's an option. I'd prefer work and family separate but I'm not gonna ask for one either haha.

[Mirandags322]

Even do finger foods, it's not supposed to be a thanksgiving feast! :) like little sandwhiches and little treats here and there.

[Shakiyiah_Mommy]

Or see if people would be willing to bring a food item or something. Baby showers don't have to be expensive!

[Mirandags322]

Best bet is to go through your list again and narrow it down to people you talk to more than others,
I had a situation to where I didn't want a baby shower due to the fact that my MIL  didn't want to invite my family cause she felt if they wanted a party they should throw there own, anyways I'm off topic, in the end his family threw there own party and my family had there own for me. Maybe you should talk to his family about it

[maw4389]

I agree with Annie.

[Destynee2015]

Maybe you can compensate for whatever they cant afford? If you want to invite extra ppl, then provide for your guests. Yes its your shower but if you want all of those extra ppl that they didnt plan for, then perhaps you pitching in for them will resolve the issue?

[lbriones]

I had multiple showers. My coworkers threw me one at work, my husband's family threw me one with just them and my family threw me one with just them. I didn't ask for it that way, but everyone didn't want to go to the one shower we had planned. It all worked out. I do agree with above. At least someone is throwing you one and paying for it. Some people aren't that lucky.

[beckyyy1115]

I have to agree with the above comment. You're gonna have to deal with it. At least their throwing you a shower.

[AnnieBrooke]

Honey, if they don't have the money, they don't have the money.  You can't get blood out of a stone.  It doesn't matter if you are more sociable or if you are less sociable, it is not a contest with your sister (except in that it probably does behoove you to understand their financial limits like she apparently did).  They have the right to call a limit if they can't afford it, up to and including the right not to host a shower at all if you make such a fuss that they feel they can't please you.