baby's father

[Annac13]

My daughters father and I are not together anymore since before I found out I was pregnant. He's always lying to me to the point that I don't even know when he's telling the truth anymore. He recently stole from his job and got fired and was arrested for having a warrant out for his arrest. He says hes a man and will be there for our daughter but I'm doubtful. My doctor and I have decided to not have him in the delivery room because he doesn't want any extra stress on me. Also I will be giving our daughter my last name. He doesn't deserve that right to have her bear his last name. He hasn't earned that. He's just now realizing he needs to get his **** together and I am already 7 months pregnant. I don't have time for childish games with him. And he thinks if things don't go his way, they can't go anyone's way. Its his way or the highway. Do you think I'm doing the right thing? If he was doing everything from the beginning to prove to me hes stepping up things would be completely different.

[AngieRose95]

I am in the exact same situation.

[Annac13]

I was on birth control when I found out I was pregnant. My doctor told me my BC had failed. I took all precautions but they didn't seem to stop me from getting pregnant.

[RockRose]

Well,  this is all hindsight,  but it would have been to your advantage to take "a little to realize" before you got pregnant.  

But I guess hindsight is 20-20.  

Best wishes.

[Annac13]

I didn't know he was like this. He's a very good manipulator and liar. It took me a little to realize but once I did I dropped him real quick. I need a grown *** man hahah

[RockRose]

Annac,  what are you doing with this guy?

You're a nurse, you've worked to make your self respectable,  what are you doing with a guy who stole from his employer and also had another unrelated warrant out for his arrest and he lies all the time?  

[Annac13]

I am 23 and a nurse. I like to think I've worked hard to get where I am. I do not wish to take my daughter away from her father but I do not want her to think what he's doing is "okay". I just want the best for her and am willing to do whatever it takes to give her the life she deserves. I just don't want to argue with him anymore. Its just exhausting. He talks about how he's so excited to meet his daughter but he's still in the same place he was 7 months ago when we found out I was pregnant. I just thought he was a better person than who he really turned out to be. I don't care if people tell me its selfish not to give her his last name because he's the father. They don't know what I have been going through. He doesn't deserve that right. While he was getting drunk and high every night with his friends I was on bed rest because I was so sick for 4 months and I still worked 9 hour shifts at work. And I am still working 40 plus hours a week and plan on doing so till my baby decides she's ready.

[Sassy1041]

Yes you are and DONT change your mind .. Don't know how old you are but my daughter is now 19 yrs old I was young her father was the same I changed my mind at the last min thinking he was a changed man I was so wrong he was there for her birth and gone the next day my daughter seen him maybe 4 times her whole life his a dead beat never giver her the time of day they don't chance believe me I'm married now to a wonderful man who loves her and I had 2 other girls after and on my last a boy due in 6 weeks there are good men out there trust me we have a great relationship keep your head up stay strong you can do it .. God Bless ..

[Mamabear4lyfe]

I am going through a quite similar situation, I'm 17 weeks pregnant with twins.. When I was about 10 weeks I made the decision that we needed to go our separate ways.. That didn't sit very well him and it turned into an awful situation. Regardless we are no longer together and I don't know if we will be, he has a lot to prove and a lot if growing up to do. I also have decided to give my twins my last name. We are "working" on things because I want a good relationship with him since he is the father... Whether it's a friendship or a partnership. But it is extremely hard, so I understand what you are going through. And you are absolutely doing the right thing. You need to do what is best for you and your daughter. So stick to your guns girl, and just focus on you and your beautiful daughter that you get to meet soon! Good luck to you :)

[chantanmore]

Yes focus on yourself and the baby that's the most important part if he comes around then deal with it but right now your health in the babies is what you gotta deal with

[FirstTimeMummy2Be]

Personally I think you are well in your rights to do whatever makes you more comfortable, alot of people wont agree but whats the point in letting him stress you out when your the one caring and carrying your daughter. I would do exactly the same thing and to be hinest its not liking your stopping him for seeing his daughter your just not allowing him to be in the room while you deliver so you dont stress yourself or your daughter out