boyfriends family issues plz help

[saramay2014]

So im having alot of issues with my boyfriends family and i really dont know what to do. My boyfriend was suposed to go with me n his grandma to chicago for a family dinner but his dad is saying no and that he cant go, my bfs grandma was still wanting me to go so i said i would, now we are trying to figure this out cause if my boyfriends dad finds out that im going it will cause problems and he will get upset at my boyfriend and cause conflict. Its stupid enought he wont let my bf go but now i really dont know what to do cause ive done packed and she really wants me to go but theres the problem with his dad.... its terible that its like this, im trying to get along with his family but his family is in a feude and now im kinda in the middle. My bf wont do anything about it and i kinda think hes mad that i said i was going.... what do i do?????

[rjt52q]

I know its hard but just try to stay positive and be happy for what u do have like a baby and at least a few people that support u.

[saramay2014]

I live with my grandpa and my grandpa wont let him live here untill we are married and untill things change i just cant marry him....

[waylonandscarlett]

He needs to do a few things, 1. Get a job, 2. Stand up to his father if he fights him call the cops file charges. 3. Be a man!

I take it he can not live with you?

[saramay2014]

How am i suposed to be happy with everything going on

[saramay2014]

Im so confused now, n have been... i want my bf to be in my life n the babys life but i just am not happy, im happy when we are together but thats not very often and the other times he dosnt do anything to make things better

[rjt52q]

Girl do what u have to do and what u think is is best for u and ur child I have been through the bs with inlaws so I know where ur coming from

[saramay2014]

It does upset me the most, i think he puts up with it because its always been like this for him, also his dad beats him if he dosnt listen, always has sence he was 3.... my boyfriend has no where to go for refuge, he has no car, no job, no money.... hes stuck

[HappyMomma33]

Your boyfriend is a man. Why are his parents dictating his life like this. Out of everything that would upset me the most.

[saramay2014]

The reason my bfs dad isnt letting my bf go is because the family we are going to see didnt congrajulate him on his new son... but i wouldnt of either, he had this child with a woman other than the one hes married to and has 2 kids with (my bf n his sister). The crazy part is that his wife is on his side!!!! Like what the heck is wrong with her!?!? Ive been thinkin lately that ive totaly gotten myself into the wrong kind of family in general. My bf is messed up, his dad is messed up, his mom is messed up, and his sister is sitting watching all this and its terible for her to be around shes only 12.... i dont understand what is wrong with these people!

[saramay2014]

I dont get tired of it, i apreciate the advice and things said. I dont understand why his dad is like this and i dont understand why he is like this. Yea his grandma is a good person very much unlike her son (my bfs dad)

[RockRose]

It's not her grandmother.  Read the post again.  

[goodvibesonly]

Why wouldn't he want you to see your own grandmother? That's messed up. Your all family now and he should respect that.

[RockRose]

Honey,  his father is weird as h.ell.  I hate to keep posting back to you,  you might be tired of hearing my voice in this.

If the family side that the grandmother is on,  who wants to take you to the family dinner in Chicago,  is normal,  lean toward that.  

Your boyfriend is 21 and can't stand up for himself for some reason,  but maybe if he sees you reaching out to this normal side of the family he'll do that too.