can we stop using "sperm donor" - rant

[GeekMom1213]

If you had consensual sex with someone and got pregnant as a result then you need to own up to the choice you made. That's not an anonymous sperm donor, it is the biological father of your child. I am disgusted by the term being used in such a way. I don't care how much of a loser your ex is - and if he's that much of a loser I don't understand why you'd have chosen to have sex with him in the first place - but like it or not he is the FATHER of your child. That baby is genetically 50% him - and that baby will have to grow up knowing it. Out of respect for your child, find a nicer way to talk about the people who make up his or her genetic code.

[LaurynStar]

Stop being so judge mental, why are you even on here worried about other women's lives? Just because you may call your child's biological father their "dad" doesn't mean every other woman has to. ****, the children even call their fathers "sperm donars". Some/MOST men don't deserve that title cause they don't do **** for their kids. Worry bout you & yours, instead them & theirs.

[oct3014]

Some of you are taking this too personal she didn't call anyone out specifically she was just voicing how she felt about the term she didn't ask for anyone's opinion! If som if you want your child's father (because that's what they really are) to be called sperm donor then that's ur business so you shouldn't get defensive when someone post something like this. If this post bugs done if you that much then you might want to get comfortable with yourselves because something like this really shouldn't get you worked up like this. My sister calls her oldest sons dad a sperm donor but she says it in more of a joking way and does not flip out when someone says something about it. I personally dnt like the term baby mama or baby daddy but hey it is what it is!

[Mzgigglez718]

lol this is 2 funny ... Every 1 is entitled 2 there own opinions .. But yea I call my 1st ex husband a Sperm donor n my husband now a real dad...been there 4 my kid 11 yrs while da other didn't bother ...

[FirstBaby10_2]

I was stating my opinion like everyone else does. Not trying to change anyone's views.  I'm not being judge mental either. Again, just stating my opinion. U stated urs, so was that judgmental to anyone who agrees u shouldn't use the term sperm donor? No. It was ur opinion.

[showard022]

I wasn't saying put yourslef in the man shoes....the women dealing with the situation. Idky I read it and it seemed the other way around.

[showard022]

I was already married at the time but my first born was conceived while I was on birth control. Doesn't always work. Thank god everyday it didn't because he's my whole world, but surprises hhappen.

[asholee]

Also birthcontrol seems like it would solve alot of these sperm donor issues.

[asholee]

I dont think her intentions were to.be judgemental, its a forums of nothing but hormonal pregnant women who over react. I dont know why people asume they have to.call the guy a father or dad in place of a sperm donor. Biological father is a replacement, doesnt imply hes a dad just that hes the one who helped create the baby. "His biological father is not in the picture " sounds a lot better. But when youre pregnant and emotional use what ever you want. When the child is born you should shower them with positivity.

[2ndBabyDueFeb13th]

First_Baby10_02
Do you not comprehend that it is NOT YOUR PLACE to determine which word is appropriate? It is NOT YOUR situation. GET OVER YOURSELVES. You cant control anyone elses feeling or views any more than they can control yours. Another womans babys father may not be a SPERM DONOR IN YOUR UNWORTHY OPINION, but to HER he can be what ever she chooses. PERIOD.

[showard022]

I think once the child is here of course those terms arent good. I would never talk my husband down in front of my son. These women are mad with good reason. It's true it can happen to anyone. The man can get stressed out of not want the responsibility and leave. Give people a break. Put yourselves in their shoes. It could happen to you. They are in a vulnerable situation, filled with hormones and feel betrayed. If it makes them feel better to refer to these men like that don't judge. If they are dipping out, using drugs, putting their innocent babu in danger they are rent a father, Period!

[oliviachae]

To me the dad of my child is now just a sperm donor, doesn't mean I will call him that to my child. When I got pregnant the baby daddy begged me to get an abortion, even offered to pay me a ton of money to get one. Since I won't get one he has signed me full custody and all parental rights. So yeah I consider him to be just the sperm donor, not the father at all. I understand I shouldn't have slept with him but I obviously made a mistake and I'm choosing to raise this child alone instead of getting an abortion.  I think people should probably learn to not be so judgmental of other people's lives.

[FirstBaby10_2]

We'll then he maybe an *** but still the father of your child. Not a sperm donor.

[pandamomnium]

A man can fool you into thinking hes a good guy till he has to step up to some responsibility.  If he runs from his responsibility and complains about it and acts like he doesnt wanna be a dad. . .what would you call him? Everyones situation ia different and theres a little thing called freedom of speech ladies. Its their baby, babys father, situation, and life. They can refer to the father as whatever they'd like.

[2ndBabyDueFeb13th]

All u need to worry about is what u call ur husband and not waste time judging and hating other women who have been in COMPLETELY different situations than you could ever imagine in your small mind.

[2ndBabyDueFeb13th]

There are times when a man can bebwith a woman for years and seem fine, but choose to leave her and become an *** after getting a woman pregnant. Obviously at the time they got pregnant the man wasnt acting up.

[2ndBabyDueFeb13th]

And you know vey well that men can change and reveal terrible characteristics later on. So stop saying they had sex with no good men. At the time the men could have been dping everything RIGHT and then after pregnancy decided to cheat and abandon them. GET A LIFE.

[FirstBaby10_2]

I agree it's not woman's fault if guy doesn't own up to being a father, but wouldn't u try to get to kno somewhat what he would be like BEFORE u have a kid with the guy? And if there that much of a price of crap don't have sex with them? Idk....

[2ndBabyDueFeb13th]

Its not YOUR PLACE to judge or say how ANY WOMAN should feel about her childs father or the way she refers to him. The only thing u need to worry about is yourself. There are a lot of different circumstances and situations that women find themselves in with men who end up leavig them or CHANGING after they get prgnant. It is totally unfair and rude to say the things u said without knowing every womans story. This post does not belong here.

[usernameistaken55]

My daughter has a father. Not the one who helped make her but the man ive been with since right after she was born. Shes two now with a brother on the way. She will never know the other half of her dna n its the best choice.

[usernameistaken55]

If a woman doesn't want to give a male the title "father" to her child she doesnt have to. Who are you to say she cant? Its not always the womans fault the man turned out to be less than a daddy. So theres no "owning" up to their own choices. There is putting ppl in their places. Sperm donors are not always anonymous btw. U can pick them. So. If a female says sperm donor then gtf over it.

[baby_love2014]

If you're choosing to sleep with a guy that is no good, that's you're own fault.
All these women talk about how in love they are with a guy and then it's "he's just a sperm donor".
You chose him, lol.
By the way,  geek mom said if you had CONSENSUAL sex...she didn't say just sex.

[asholee]

My best friend has a dad who was in and out of prison during our childhood. He never even spelled her name right on the few cards she got from him. Not once have i heard her call her dad a sperm donor and she is a very positive, successful woman. If a guy has put you in a situation where you feel its necessary to refer to him as such maybe just avoid talking about him or to him unless you are going after child support. Try to stay positive, kids pick up on negativity and resentment and it can cause them to be stressed.

[Mreeah]

Personally i think its kinda funny. Lol
Doesnt change the fact that they are the biological father, but hey, thats none of my buisness.

[FirstBaby10_2]

I definitely agree with u 110%  geekmom1213...maybe u should think about who ur having sex with.