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Can it get better???
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Can it get better???

I really don't know what to do at this point and could use some advice.  I'm divorced with 2 older teens and my girlfriend is divorced twice with 2 young kids from her last marriage.

When we first started dating we each thought the other was the greatest thing.  We had a ton of similar interests and the sexual connection was incredible.  For the first few months we had a sexual relationship that was almost every day.  She was actually the one that said I had better be able to keep up with her. We actually had a few arguments pretty early in the relationship.  Every time we would argue about something she would say I was too sensitive or that I had anger issues.  I really don't like to have disagreements but she seems to feed on them. Yes even with this going on I recently moved in with her.

As far as the changes that have gone on with us, she has had some health problems and says she is drained and feels tired all the time.  I try to take care of things at the house and end up putting her kids to bed at night.  My youngest has a room here to and is at school functions and work most of the time.  She loses her temper with her kids and will yell at them as well as her parents who watch her kids while she is at work for free.  I know I'm not the only one who gets yelled at but I feel like it is very degrading when she tries to yell and put me down.  She can be so caring at times and everything is great which is  why I love her so much but then there is the complete opposite some times too.  For the last 2-3 months our sex has gone from almost every day to once a week if we're lucky.  It is usually a quickie in the morning before waking the kids up to go to school and work.  She's too tired at night.  I had mentioned the decrease in the past and was told I was being insensitive because of her health problems and all I cared about is sex so I don't say anything anymore.  Ran out of space so any advice would be great.

2 Comments
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3060903_tn?1390303996
Unless your girlfriend can learn to control he anger, i wouldn't stay in the relationship. Many time one will deflect responsibility for their own anger issues, by creating a situation where you feel you feel you have no other way to respond, in order to be heard, than to get angry yourself. In other words, her yelling all the time could be what is changing your way of communicating. Relationships are supposed to bring out the best in the other person, but that's not happening here.

Life is too short to be demoralized by someone constantly, it's abusive. It's not a good example for your daughter. If this is something that she's in denial about and you cannot hope that she changes it's a dead end relationship. Don't overcompensate for the fact that your girlfriend is sick, the fact that you are supporting her through this all the while being understanding that your sex life is taking a back seat. should warrant her gratitude and respect for you. It sounds like she is treating you with the same dynamic as her poor children. You are therefore enabling her, by allowing her to treat you this way, and it's going to end badly for you. Why waste your life on someone not able to be grateful for having you in theirs lives? There's more fish in the seas, my friend. Take a chance and find someone with less baggage, if she cannot be reasoned with. God bless you and your child.
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3060903_tn?1390303996
If your girlfriend won't go into counseling and make a change for the better, i would leave her, asap. Life is too short!!
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