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154765 tn?1237247944

my Husband is too much on the computer..

bip
I posted awhile ago abouut my husband yelling too much now it's something different He goes on the computer alot hes really into this game Time he comes home from work (330) until he goes to bed.. I get upset cause I go to work when I get home and he still is on it. It drives me bananas I don't mind him on the computer but it's too much cause I have kids. I get upset with him and he thinks Im picking on him and Im not. He said it relieves his stress. Ya, that is good something relieves his stress but it's too much on the computer. I told him to go on when the kids go to bed he thinks Im trying to control him but Im not. I just need advise. What do you think Im getting upset for nothing? I know it is worst out there but it's just the fact he's on it too much. Please tell me if you think Im being mean.. I tell him to marry the computer. (LOL)
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Avatar universal
Ok so I hate everybody saying "well at least he is at home and not out there doing drugs or crazy stuff." It may not be as severe of a problem as that but it can be just as damaging to a relationship. My boyfriend and I have two kids together and I am in the same boat. He can literally spend like 8 or more hours on the internet playing poker and just watching random videos on youtube. I can't even have a conversation with him while receiving his undivided attention. He is still typing and concentrating on the stupid game. I love him fiercely and want to spend the rest of my life with him but if the computer is important enough to ruin our relationship over then we can split up and he can be on the computer as much as he likes. I'm getting to the point where I feel like that is my only option. I don't mind him unwinding on the computer for even a couple hours. But he gets short with the kids when he has to tend to something they need because he gets interrupted. And for him to spend just as much time on the computer as he does at work is ridiculous. So I know how you feel ladies and I think its not acceptable.
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Avatar universal
ha I guess we all have something in common!!! I bought a laptop to get on the internet, and my husband was always on it wanted it to him self, every chance i get, i hide the thing!!!
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Avatar universal
I went to the store and bought a bunch of games, and here I am .. in the middle of one, on the internet.. turn the tables on him.
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Avatar universal
my husband is also on the computer all the time. it drives me crazy. we are newly married and have a one year old daughter and i feel like he is neglecting both of us. i try everything to get off the computer and nothing seems to work. it makes me feel so lonely and depressed because we moved to another state for his job and he is all i have. if you figure something out please let me know.
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Avatar universal
My girlfriend finally bought a computer and she is now on it to a lot though that is when I want to watch a game she couldn't care about.

Try turning the tables and see what happens.

Good luck.
Helpful - 0
212795 tn?1194952574
Can you ask him if he wants to go out for dinner one night when you guys don't have the kids, or go out for a movie.  Let him know you want to do something together, or as a family.  We saw Pirates of the Carribean a couple of weeks ago - very good movie!!!  

My point is instead of concentrating on the computer aspect, which he interprets as nagging, ask him for one night a week of "couple's time" or a family night... or both!  You guys could get a pizza and play games for your fgamily night, and for couples night, you guys could go out for dinner or the two of you could even go for a walk to the park or something.  Since he's not out, or going on some crazy sites or something, just let him know how important quality time is to you, and ask him for couple nights a week of quality time with you and with the children - this doesn't exclude him from helping with family chores and with the children.  However, you are expressing to him that you want some quality time, and you are not controlling his desire to play his computer game.  You'd be surprised what types of doors this opens:)  Best wishes
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Avatar universal
at least you know where he is!!!!
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154765 tn?1237247944
bip
Ya I guess he could be doing worst.
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Avatar universal
Hi Bib, I know how addicting the internet can be.  I am always on my computer, checking out this website or answering a post or emailing people.  It's just so easy to do.  And the time just flies too.  All of a sudden I'll realize I've spent my whole night on the computer!!!!   I do notice that I'm on the internet when I really should be doing something constructive such as look for a job or read a book.  It's an escape from reality for me and maybe for your husband as well.  I don't play games but those can be so addicting from what I hear.  

All I can say is that at least he is not out running around with other women or drinking/drugs.  At least he is HOME.  Ok, so here's my advice:  Lay off him for a while....let him be, play his games.  If you need help with the kids, he should be helping you though.  You didn't have those kids by yourself.  You might want to put a little bug in his ear about how addicting the internet can be too.  There really should be a support group for internet addicts.  Is there?  Does anyone know??

Take care, mayflowers
Helpful - 0
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