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Predict the Result of Forbidden Relationships
Guy and girl #1. Fall in love while still in high school, get married and have 3 children. Two boys and a girl. The perfect couple in every way. He is a manual worker all day in the heat, she tends bar at the local popular Fridays. Been there for years both of them. The kids are into football and Dad is right there after working all day but had developed bad habits when it comes to communicating and meeting the needs of the wife. He does not really have many friends,but does dedicate any extra time to the sports of his children. He is a loving man with a temper out of this world when provoked. Wife is only one who can calm him.

Couple #2. Guy and girl married for 13 years, oldest child is 9 years old. They made the mistake of joining groups of activities where friends had sex with each other. Did not work, destroyed the wife's self image and to make things worse, she developed severe jealousy at hubby's friendly and outgoing personality. Living in the same house but in separate bedrooms. He too works part time at the local Fridays restaurant.

Neither couple is having sex nor are they actively trying to work on their marriages.  Girl from couple A meets Boy in couple b and start a relationship, at first talking and later leading to a physical relationship. Now she thinks she is in love. The guy from couple b is friends with the husband of couple a. There has been talk previously but allegations denied by both parties., regarding a relationship between the two.   Wife from couple b bugs car of husband and overhears her hubby talking to wife of couple a. Gig is up, now word is out and wife of couple b is making threats to wife of couple a calling her employment, making threats, attempting to contact hubby of couple no1.

Now wife of couple num 1 realizes she must confess to husband and is working on the time to do it and is in fear of her life as well as the lovers life. She does not want to hurt him, did not plan this and now thinks she is truly in love with the lover. Hubby of couple no2 has been caught and is now shunned by family members for his actions and is sleeping on a couch of a friend. What do you think is going to happen?

This is a true scenario that will play out in the next few days.  I would like you to predict what you think is going to happen when hubby from couple #1 is told that his wife has been in an affair with a guy that claimed to be his friend and is now in love with his wife and is a threat of him losing his family over. Remember, this guy lives, breathes and eats his family and worships the ground they walk on.  I will let you know if any of you are correct in your prediction.
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686059 tn?1293837427
Isn't the entire situation pure tension and uncertanty! I can't imagine being in their shoes. Keep an eye out for the kids....
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Wife of couple #1, came clean to hubby last night about the affair. It be bad! I was called to come and when I got there Hubby was walking around the house screamin, in tears and calling her every name in the book.  I ended up keepin the kids overnite. So now the truth is out and hubby is taking kids and moving this sat into a cheaper place to live. Now they are fighting over who will keep the kids. Mom came and picked them up this morning and got them off to school. Dad will take over when he gets off work, I hope! Hubby of Couple #2 filed for divorce, and I hope he is smart enough to not be found for a few days. Such a hurtful situation all round. Will keep ya posted!

So what do you think will happen next? Will Hubby of Couple #1 go looking for Hubby of couple #2. Will wife of couple #1 stay with hubby of couple #2. What do you guys see coming next?
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145992 tn?1341348674
I think wife of couple #1 will stay with hubby #2, irregardless of how much it will hurt hubby #1 or wife #2.  They are selfish and they don't care about the feelings of their children either.  It's unfair but I bet this is how it will play out until they cheat on each other somewhere down the line, because what goes around comes around.
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686059 tn?1293837427
How awful, but the truth has set her free somewhat, but there is going to be hell to pay!  I think wife #1 and hubby will have a messy divorce. He will fight to keep the kids on grounds of adultery. Judge will give her visitation's if he is in a good mood.  Hubby #1 has children to raise and be an example to, so I don't think he will go after hubby #2, but I advise that hubby #2, stay out of sight, because if hubby #1 under rage can hurt him or God forbid do the unthinkable.  I see messy divorce and the children will suffer and struggle to understand why mommy is no longer home.

After all is said and done, wife #1 might stay with hubby #2, but all hell is going to break lose in his home if wife #1 decides to name who the adulterer. He might not want her and decide to make thinkg work with his wife, but Wife #2, will file for divorce, keep the kids, house, bank account...she will suck the life right out of him, let him see the kids....maybe, and move forward to make a better home for her kids.      
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902589 tn?1268152453
Wow, well at least wife #1 finally came clean.  I would also suggest that hubby #2 lay low although if hubby #1 finds him and beats the **** outta hubby #2 i don't blame him for it. But since hubby #1 is really involved with the kids i don't think he'll do that but ya never know.

i think wife #1 may stay with hubby#2, but who knows both wife #1 and hubby #2 will probably get screwed in the end because i firmly believe karma is a b*tch and the cheating will come back to both of them in some way!

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anyway you look at it there is going to be trouble, as hubby no 1 will never trust his wife again, and you can bet wife of no2 hubby will make all of the trouble she can, i do not believe that hubby no 1 is going to take all of this to well, i wonder why peope cant be satisfied with what they have, because i do not believe that hubby no 2 will make wife of hubby no 1 happy in the long run.  i do hope that no one gets hurt   jo
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730826 tn?1317946934
Holy cow! I feel bad for you and your son in law. I do not stand for cheating of any sort. Especially cheating on your husband with someone else you know is married. Thats cheating X2.
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A couple of clarifications to be made here, as I was not clear about them in my update. Wife of Couple #1 came clean as I said, but what I did not clarify is that she did indeed admit who the guy was she was cheating with. Secondly, she admitted that this has been going on since the youngest da who will be 3 on the 12th, was one year old. So now, the Hubby of couple #1 is asking if the baby is indeed his. He has cut his wife off as far as funds, checking account etc. She has no money, no place to stay, no way to get a lawyer and it is looking like no way to keep him from taking the children.

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145992 tn?1341348674
Wow, I know it's your daughter but she is now paying the price.  Is it his baby?
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686059 tn?1293837427
Told ya it was going to and will get real messy. He's going out for "blood" and will request a DNA test on poor little one.  Hubby #2 better go underground (lol).
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I am left pondering whether to step up and help her, but, somewhere deep inside me, I think her lover should? Yet I am her mom and do not want to c her lose her babies. I will pray about it, hopefully they will both come to their senses and not use the children as weapons. Not likely any time soon tho!

I never doubted that the baby was his, but now! I am just sickened by it all! I will keep you all posted, keep giving scenarios guys, it really helps!
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686059 tn?1293837427
She will definately need your support in whatever you are able to help her with. What a mess and the children need to be protected for all of this..I will keep you and your family in my prayers for a peaceful resolution.
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145992 tn?1341348674
Good luck teko. I think you should stand back and allow her to learn her life lessons. I don't think there would be much you can do any way. I send my wishes to you and hope it all ends up ok for those poor children.
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I wonder why wife of hubby no 2 is being so quiet about all of this, it seems she is taking this to calm, also if wife of hubby no 1 has been cheating this long, she does not love her husband and they will be better off divorced, i also worry about hubby no2 being into the sex games i cant bekieve that hubby no 1 is taking this so calm  i feel for you, but whe a child reaches maturity, they will not listen, and you have to let them learn on their own, if you get in the middle it may not be a wise thing to do, as they need to learn the hard way, i have had to learn a lot the hard way and when i did i still remember  luck  to you  whatever you decide i wish you the best   jo
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Hubby of couple #1 called place of employment of Wife and talked to her manager and co workers about the whole situation. Wife has to go in to work on friday.  Now Im ticked! That is illegal for a manager where you work to talk to your drunk husband while on duty about your employee!
Hubby of couple #1 contacted Hubby of couple #2 and requested his wifes phone no. Said he wanted to talk to someone who was going thru the same thing he was, and said he was interested in getting to know her, maybe they could find something in common also.

Children want to go stay with Nana (me). Acting out badly. fearful, tearful and throwing tantrums.

Wife of couple #1 went for state aid today, but cannot get any until hubby is gone. hmmm.  Looks like he will def take the kids, nothing she could do to stop him at this point.

Wife of couple #1 wants manager at work fired, and will not settle for anything less, come to find out, this manager has dated the hubby of couple #2 herself!  

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145992 tn?1341348674
Oh my gosh this is a damn soap opera. Is there no other people in this town.
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686059 tn?1293837427
Holy ****! What a mess!!! told ya it was going to get "real ugly"....this is just the beginning. It's going to get worse!  Please do everything that you can to protect the babies....Judy
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686059 tn?1293837427
I did write "Holy Cr*p" (lol)...dont want medhelp chasing after me again :)
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686059 tn?1293837427
They are keeping the town entertained with all this serious drama...it reminds me of "housewives"...:)
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I know , seriously! And I am not including everything that is going on, like the landlords now know about it all and all the parents of the 7 year olds footbal team!  Maybe I ought to write a book!

So, wife of hubby #1 has been axed from the bank accounts and is hot, gotta work tonight too, so that will be something else. In the mean time the hubby is calling me telling me why he cut her off the money.

Me? I have decided to sit on the sidelines and let it play out. Why? Because in my mind, if it were my kids, no one would take them from me, period.  No matter what! I would find a way and I do not see that determination here. And to think I left em all in Ohio to avoid drama!  She is the only one who followed me here! So tomorrow he moves the kids to a different town, different school.  I think this is way tooo much for the kids, but hey, no one cares what I think.
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To those who may stumble upon this post and wonder what is going on, I am writing and logging this activity for several reasons. The main reason is to show the world day by day, how this kind of behavior can destroy not only your self, your loved ones, your children but in fact all those who touch your lives.  I would hope you would read this and realize how ugly this is to all and never go this route.  I know they are women out there that somehow feel special when someone elses man wants to date them.  Is this sexy? In any way is it fair? 6 childrens lives have been interupted here and 2 homes, all because of 2 people listening to each other about each others problems with their spouses. Next time you have issues, go home and talk to your significant other. I personally feel that there should be criminal charges to protect the children from parents who do this to their children. IMO
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From what I have been told, Hubby #2 has filed for divorce and has left the home. Probably with wife of hubby#1, no one knows for sure where she is staying.
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bumping it up!
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686059 tn?1293837427
Oh wow hubby 1 waited not time taking action, but taking the children out of town and new  in the early stages of school season is damaging. How frightening for them see new home, school and start over with friends....this can have future consequences for and fears for them.

Teko, you are an amazing woman, willing to put your personal life out there to prove a point about the consequences of adultery. As everyone know this forum is very sensitive to adultery, which is simply unexceptable, inmoral, selfish behavior.

Thanks Teko you are simply FANTASTIC!!!!
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145992 tn?1341348674
I really feel so sad for your grandkids teko.  I understand his anger but he's not thinking with a level head.  He's fighting to protect them but in the end he's gonna hurt them.  They are already going through so much because they undoubtedly feel the tension and to uproot them from their normal day to day activities and to take them from their friends and their school, is only going to hurt them.  Yes, she wasn't thinking of their children but she is still their mother and to use them as a pawn in this wicked game is just going to cause them so much emotional damage.  They shouldn't have to chose sides.  They are so innocent.  This is all so sad.
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Last night someone texted hubby #1 a pic of a woman, giving oral sex. (The pic was done in such a way that you cold not clearly identify the gal but at first glance, looked like his wife.  It seems to me that a guy would do that, cause it was clear that whoever sent it, sent it with the intent to hurt him. What do you think?

Today he was supposed to take the kids and move. He called me to come see the place. I went. It was horrible! I mean horrible!  I threw a fit! Told him he was not moving those kids into that nasty mess. It looked like drug addicts and drunks all congregated outside. Inside was awful! He said he had to have something cause the rent was out on the other place.  I caved.  I took him to look at some places and actually monetarily helped secure one for him and the kids. I just could not have them living like that! He will pay me back, so the move was put off a few days, but at least they will have something decent to live in.  I hope i did not make a mistake.
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686059 tn?1293837427
I think hubby #2 is being a$$hole and to rub salt in wound sent picture or who know it could have been wife 2, but either way, it was with evil intent to do damage. Not good!

Really good move on the monitery help, but concern for his mental state on selection of new high risk neighborhood! Shows desperation to settle anywhere with kids. Scary.

Glad you stepped in to help.
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for the kids sake you have to do what you think is best , but whoever sent that pic is one dirty person, it sounds like they want him to do something drastic, i hope that he trys and keeps a cool head  luck  jo
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Hubby of couple #1 is taking the kids and moving tomorrow. Wife of couple#1 along with Hubby of couple #2 moved some furniture that she is keeping to the storage unit today. Hubby of couple #1 has found a friend to babysit for a reasonable amount each week, thereby allowing mommy to get a day job to save for a place to live. Wife of couple #2 is still stalking wife of couple #1. Emotions are up and down as is to be expected. Any court action is put on hold for now because neither party has money. Hubby of couple #2 has a date with a lawyer on the 28th. Will see how the weekend goes. I have some stuff in their garage to get out, before the landlord padlocks the place! lol
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145992 tn?1341348674
What are wife #1's feelings about everything?  About losing her kids, about having to move?  
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686059 tn?1293837427
This is awful and I feel sorry for the kids. Wife#1 w/hubby#2 was predictable, but is she willing to leave the kids behind with hubby 1....this is sad.
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Wife of Cupple #1 took the van, but thinks hubby should still make the payment. She thinks it is also fair for hubby to pay her to be there at 5 in the morning and get the kids from school and keep the 3 yr old all day. She thought 250.00 wkly from hubby was fair. The person he got to watch them tho will take 50.00 a wk cause is the wife of a guy that hubby #1 works with.

I must really be old fashioned, cause I thought if you left the marriage you were on your own?
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maybe i am not getting this but i did not think you got paid to watch your own kids, jo
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686059 tn?1293837427
I guess I'm naive and old fashion, because I thought the same. How times have changed.
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I am finding myself in a precarious situation, because they both come to me to talk. I love my da more than life itself, but find myself so angry with her these days. I cannot help it, my heart goes out to my sil and the kids. I remind myself that it is their problem and try to steer clear of it but it is so hard to do.  I told my sil that his responsibility is to the children, and now I feel guilty for dissing my da. :(

This situation really hurts me and I am so torn.
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145992 tn?1341348674
Don't feel that way teko. Your daughter must understand consequences of her actions. If her husband has custody of the kids your daughter actually has to pay him child support. If she loves hubby #2 so much and he loves her so much then why doesn't he buy her a car and take care of her financially. I mean he wanted her so badly. I think you should be honest with your daughter and tell her how you feel about her actions. She should know the truth even if it hurts her to hear. That's just my opinion.
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i with the other ladies...i didn't think you got paid to watch your own kids. if that's the case...WHERE'S MY MONEY??? lol jk jk

those 2 have really cause a heck of mess for everyone. does wife #1 feel any remorse what so ever for ruining 2 families? for uprooting 6 children. stealing away 3 childrens father and (i guess she didn't abandon hers...technically) leaving her children. i wouldn't be able to live without seeing my little monsters everyday. they maybe heading into the terrible twos but...they're mine. they make life complete.

why does she expect her hubby to pay for HER to have a vehicle? it's no longer his concern. his only concern now are those children. which i feel awful for. do they know what's going on? do they understand that their mommy is with another man now? how are they all taking it?
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I did tell my daughter that in my opinion, lover boy needs to step up to the plate with the cash, but I didnt expect him to.  My guess is that he will either go back and work it out with his wifee or dump her for another hot bod down the road. She tells my sil how her lovers wife is stalking her. I told the sil to not try to pay the car payment, it was her deal.  I will be watching the kids today while grampa and daddy move them. I will better see what they are going thru when mom and dad are not around. Hope. You guys are great.
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902589 tn?1268152453
It's kind of ridiculous to ask her hubby for money to watch her own kids! What is she thinking?? They are her responsibility too, she doesn't get compensated for spending time with her children because that's what she should be doing in the first place! I would think seeing her children would be the most important thing here.

and I don't think her lover should be responsible for getting money for her. She needs to step up, be responsible and do it for herself. She created the mess she's in so she needs to take care of it herself. I also agree with the others that even though she's your daughter, she needs to do this on her own, and I also wouldn't step in, she's an adult, she made her bed, she can sleep in it. Although teko I don't know how you are able to even deal with this! Good thing those children will be with grandma and out of the drama for a bit! Those poor kids!

Hopefully things will start to clear up, though it'll probably take a long time for the anger to go away(on hubby #1 part)
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145992 tn?1341348674
I think eventually hubby #2 will go back with his wife. I agree with megochick that she needs to get her life on track. Start taking care of herself and her kids financially. My fiancée's sister completely abandoned her daughter since she got into a new relationship, does your daughter even feel bad or miss her kids. I just can't understand it because I would fight tooth and nail for my child.
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I do not remember if the age of wife no 1 was mentioned or the age of the boys of wife no1 maybe wife no 1 has not matured enough to realise just what she has done if hubby no 1 took her back it would be because of the children, but he would never trust her, also i cant see why she left the chilfren if she loved them, matbe she wanted to be free as a bird, i realy do not think that she is looking to the future, if hubby no1 gets a divorce it will be natural for him to remarry and the step mother will help raise her children, i wonder if she knows what will happen, and also what will the children think of what she has done, will it bother her, or is this what she wants no one knows what is in her mind at this point wife no 2 will probably stay with her hubby, and cater to his wishes it really is a mess and both wife no 1 and hubby no2 should  suffer together for all the hurt they have caused. i do worry about the children and hope for thei sake they can be happy as the ole saying goes maybe it will all come out in the wash  jo
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458072 tn?1291418786
Oh what a tangled web we weave. This is such a mess, and the children are the innocent victims here. They didn't do a thing to cause this, yet, they are having to pay such a high price becuase of the parents selfishness. Being a parent means your kids needs come first.

I say the adults get whats coming to them, but those children, that is what is so heartbreaking.

  Our actions bring consequences to others besides ourselves.
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Sil and the kids are moved in to the new residence. Wife spent the last two days getting her stuff out and her lover helped her leaving for a new round of hurt feelings and intense anger on hubbys end, which I think ***** cause he refused to help her himself and she had to have someone.  He screamed at her and yelled at her in front of the kids and told the 7 year old to tell his mom how bad of a mother she was. Seven year old said, Daddy there is nothing in my brain! Looked scared. Mom left crying and Dad followed her to the car and hit the car and told her she would never get the kids, period. Da called me crying because the kids were scared and needing to c a lawyer but no money. I know she is looking to me for help, dont know what to do.
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145992 tn?1341348674
Uy ya ya....this is becoming a complete disgrace.  First of all, wife #1 shouldn't have brought her lover.  I'm sure she could've found someone else to help her.  Secondly, husband #1 is acting like a disgusting pig.  You don't involve the children in any way.  That is still their mother, no matter what happens between the two of them.  To put the kids in the middle is a disgrace.  I hope somewhere down the line these two can work together for the sake of those kids.  Although, I think that may never happen.
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i am quite sure my mother loved me but she was a fair and harsh woman she was honest and she told me when i got married i was making my own bed and to lay in it, she never offered advice or help she said my marriage problems were up to me, she never watched the children as she traveled and had her own life to live, so i can give no advice except that maybe she should learn the hard way she made one big mistake in takibg the boyfriend to help her move that is like rubbing salt in a raw wound  i know that you love your daughter, but will she do it again, i see no way for her to get the children and it is sad that they should see the parents argue surley wife no 1 knew this when she had her boyfriend go with her i wish you luck in your decisions go with you own instincts   jo
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Okay, well! Today the wifee of hubby #1 consulted an attorney. 5000.00 big ones now to handle a divorce. Here is the good part of it all. The state we life in is no fault, which means if someone commits adultry it is not held against them. Another thing is there is no such thing as custody in this state. It is called shared parenting. Both parents are involved. Debts are divided as to what is fair in the particular situation and not necessarily 50/50 as is done in other states.

The other thing that happened today is hubby #1 called Hubby # 2. I think I mentioned earlier that these two had been friends in the past. Well, they talked on the phone about 3 hours or so with hubby #1 crying and carrying on and hubby #2 encouraging him to sit down and talk to his wife, something they had never been able to do without fighting.

So, I was supposed to have dinner with my da and she calls me and tells me she is meeting hubby #1 at his request in a restraurant, to talk.   So, why do I get the feeling that after he has a couple of beers, all hell gonna break loose?  Kids are with a sitter. What do you all make of this?
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145992 tn?1341348674
What are they going to talk about?  The kids?  Their marriage?  I think hubby #1 will let out a lot of hurt and anger and I feel like it could end poorly but wife #1 can make the difference with her responses to him.  If she doesn't get angry back or seems remorseful, then perhaps the conversation may not get out of hand.  She needs to control herself even if he verbally assaults her.  She needs to understand he is really hurting, he's been betrayed by not only his wife but also with his friend.  So it's a double betrayal.  She can be the bigger person here.
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686059 tn?1293837427
That's a lot of money for a divorce and since adultery is not recognized as a reason for divorce (that's unbelievable) what then irreconcilable differences? I'm glad that both hubby's were able to discuss the situation like adults without all hell breaking lose over the phone, BUT if they meet in person, you never know! I'm glad the children will be able to spend time with both parents and counseling will help them to through their school.

If I were your daughter, I would be concern about meeting hubby 1 anywhere, but let's see how this plays out.
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They met, they talked, hubby#1 cried. Wife stuck to her guns about not going back, regardless of how things turn out with lover boy. They agreed to figure things out themselves rather than pay lawyers a bunch of money for the same thing they can do themselves.
In the state of florida the only statutes for getting a divorce are six months of residency and proof that marriage is over. If one of the party files for divorce the other cannot contest it. It goes thru anyway. All states are different in their divorce laws. As long as no one has filed in Florida, sil could pack the kids up and haul them to Ohio where the divorce laws are much much different.

So all is calm for now, but we all know that is not gonna last long.
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where is wife no 2 while all of this is going on have they forgotten her?  jo
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