Am i being stupid?

[anonymous3691]

Hi, im a teen and im female.

me and my boyfriend knew each other as friends for 4 years, and have been in a relationship together for nearly a year now and we've told each other that we love each other alot
and i know i love him from all of my heart and i want to be with him forever.

i dont know whats wrong with me but i get 'mardy' alot like i have constant mood swings and i really want it to stop.

i also get upset over very little things, and recently ive noticed a few changed in him,
he doesnt talk to me as much as he used to
he doesnt call me as much as he used to
and most of all he doesnt text me as much as he used to and before we used to text constantly and we both enjoyed it, now when i text him he doesnt reply back straight away, he replies after quite a while, sometimes i get frustrated and ask him, 'why are you replying so late?' and he just tells me to relax and chill out
i hate it when he tells me to just 'relax' because hes got me hooked
im constantly staring at my phone waiting for a reply and when i dont see a reply after ages it gets me upset
what do i do?
i tell him that he doesnt love me anymore because i think his love is fading but he just tells me e still loves me but i dont think he means it anymore.

and because of him, i lost alot of my friends because we had many arguments about 'boys' so now he's the only one i have left, and i just want him to myself because i have nobody, all my bestfriends have all left me and hes the only one by my side.. for now i think
i dont want to lose him but me being upset and mardy is pushing him away from me

please can someone help me? i love him so much..

[Maxsays]

Well me too totaly agree with thatquietgirl..
As a man i tell u i act same just like ur bf to my gf..
In start we used to talk alot but now its round about 6 months since we are together an now am being comfortable, sometime i dont feel like talking so i dont reply it doesn't mean i dont love her, an u getin mardy on him just because u dont have anyother friend. An you feel like he doesnot understand your feelings.
Just u need to talk to him about how u feel when he replies u late, why dont u make him see this thread? Maybe this could make him feel what u feel :) hope it helped

[Londres70]

I will agree with thatquietgirl; good advice.  

I don't understand why are you making this relationship/him the center of everything and letting everything/everyone else fall by the wayside?  You are depending on him WAY too much; too clingy.  Clinginess is not healthy; your behavior is not healthy.

What's your family life like?  What have your past relationships been like?

[thatquietgirl]

Please don't take this the wrong way, but you should truly find other interests and people to hang around aside from your boyfriend.  Otherwise, your relationship isn't going to be the healthiest.  It's good for both of you to explore interests on your own.  I know you said you don't have friends because you lost them due to arguments, but you could either try to repair them or find new friends.  It's not easy, but it is possible and truly is the best thing for you.  It's not good to rely on one person and one person alone and to make that one person the center of your world.  It doesn't sound like it's the case now at all, but if you were to make him your sole friend and not do things on your own for long, it can start to wear on him and cause him to feel resentful.  Please, find some other things to do outside your relationship for your sake as much as for his.  Pick up a hobby you enjoy like reading, writing, biking, jogging, walking, a sport, video games, a craft, etc.  It'll also keep your mind off the time it takes him to reply to your texts.

As far as the decline in phone calls, texts, etc. goes, that's fairly normal as a relationship progresses and you both get comfortable with each other and the relationship.  The mass amount of calling and texting at the beginning is because it's new, exciting, fun.  Not to say it's not fun after a few months or exciting because obviously it is.  It's just that you're more comfortable.  You realize this is working and you're exclusive, there's no need to keep tabs all the time.  (Inadvertently, it is what we all are doing to an extent even if we're not asking.  If he's texting/calling you or you're texting/calling him, you guys were both able to tell there was nothing fishy going on.)  So take it as a good thing.  He's comfortable with you, with the relationship.  However, if he never ever texts or calls (whether to text/call you back or what) or makes an effort, then that's not right and it's something to talk about.

I have to ask this: when you call, does he pick up?  Because if he does and he's a gamer, he could have headphones on and not hear the tiny beep his cell phone makes when it receives a text in comparison to the sound of the ring tone for a call.  It's what happens with my boyfriend, and we've discussed this and are on even terms.

Have you tried telling him you'd like for him to call you a little more often?  That you miss the frequency and the closeness talking to him so much made you feel?  And then asking him to try to call a little more often?  In a low key, no pressure, no guilt-inducing way where it's obvious it's more you expressing a desire than attacking him and accusing him?

Anyway, I wish you and your boyfriend the best and honestly think you have nothing to worry about with your relationship right now.  Just realize it's very, very vital and very, very healthy if you both have other hobbies and friends outside the relationship and relax.