Can't let go

[diana0223]

Me and this guy went out for a few months, but we have been friends for years. We broke up one year and a couple months ago but i can't get over him. He has a new girl, and you can tell he really likes her, but i just can't let go. I've tried everything, i haven't talked to him in 8 months. I deleted his number, deleted him from myspace. Everything i do just doesn't seem to work. I still cry for him, and everybody tells me I'm obsessed but i just don't know what to do. I just want to forget about him, it's been too long.

[mami1323]

There must have been something you really liked about him and that's difficult when you really have feelings to just let go but there has to have been a reason why it didn't work out.  You have to think of those reasons and know that it was the best thing.  Whether he was the one who did the breaking up or you were, it was just not meant to be.  Sometimes we find those people that we just click with and then have trouble letting go.  You've definitely taken the right steps to getting him out of your life, deleting his number, not calling him, getting him off your social networking pages.  The next step is not asking anyone about what he's up to or finding out any info on his life.  All it will do is hurt you.  If someone wants to gossip about him, just tell them in a nice way that you would rather not talk about him.  They will never bring him up again.  I know you may get curious to hear about him and find out about his relationship, with hopes that they will break up, but if they don't and you find out how in love they are, it will only break your heart.  You don't need a set back.  So just like specialmom says, get out there.  Hang out with friends, go on vacations.  I will tell you, the quickest way that I was able to get over an ex was when I would go on vacation.  I would always have fun with friends and some how meet guys and sometimes I would even meet a guy to date.  I would come back stronger and more relaxed and ready to move on with my life.  We are only young once, why waste it thinking and being sad about someone who isn't worth it.  Enjoy life!!!!  Good luck and know you will be fine in time.

[specialmom]

I am sorry you are feeling this way.  It can take a really long time to get over someone and no one can tell you how long that should be.  But the good news is that you eventually will.  What I would do in the meantime is work on you.  Think about what you are passionate about and what you like to do and get busy with it.  Make sure some type of physical activity is mixed in as exercise is wonderful for improving our mood.  It's also a great way of meeting people.  Speaking of which, get active with other people.  Make sure you have an active social life and pursue other things that don't involve where you might see him or places you went with him, etc.  (like, how do you know he has a new girl and really likes her when you haven't talked to him in 8 months).  Get busy making your life the most it can be.  And with time, you will move on and he will seem less important.  I went through this in my 20's.  I had some so so relationships after my heartbreak and then met my husband.  Haven't thought of the heartbreak guy much at all and never do I think of him with regret as I am happy  now.  So get happy and forget him!  good luck to you and peace and happiness coming your way!