Aa
Confused and unsure about my Boyfriend.
Hey to you all, I need a bit of advice and I hope you can help me. I apologize in advance if it a bit long.
Three years ago I was raped and I've had some bad relationships in the past; most have used me for sex and convenience. I was coming out of a bad relationship and this guy came into my life; he was shy and nervous and he asked me out. The first date was beyond awkward; he told me he loved me and said that he was glad he would never have to date anyone again. I burst out crying; it was incredibly overwhelming. He even made a joke about something his father said before the date; he told him not to propose to me. I went home crying my eyes out. He was pretty full on and he even tried to kiss me which felt too much; considering.
I decided to give him a chance so we began to go out; I told him what happened to me and he was very supportive but I honestly don't think he truly understands. He has a mild case of Aspergers and he has been open with me about it. He's a Mama's boy and if we are together he texts her 3 to 4 times in a couple of hours. He constantly needs to hold me in his arms which is nice but it's too much for me because I need my space; I've even told him that but he doesn't seem to listen.
When it comes to intimacy, he doesn't want me to touch his genitals and he had told me that he doesn't want to touch mine. Even if I touch his leg he cringes and pulls away; he touches my breasts even though I tell him not to as I'm not comfortable with him doing it. We have been dating for seven months and I've been having doubts since the beginning but that could be because of my past or that simply he's not the right guy.
He sends me gifts and tells me he loves me via text a million times a day as well as he misses me and it gets tiresome for me. If I don't reply straight away, he re-sends the text a couple more times. When he has time off he never does anything with his time and when we are together he just wants to cuddle while I want to do things like go for walks or play games with him such as Xbox but he's not bothered. I feel like I'm settling and I really don't want to do that; it's not fair on me or him.
The worst thing though is that he has decided that I'm the ONE for him but I'm not so sure. He wants children by the end of his 20's;he's 24 now but he cringes at the thought of me getting pregnant. I just don't understand him at all.
Phew, sorry about the length, I just wanted to make sure I got everything down.
If you can offer me some advice then I'm grateful for your insight; I'm just confused.
Three years ago I was raped and I've had some bad relationships in the past; most have used me for sex and convenience. I was coming out of a bad relationship and this guy came into my life; he was shy and nervous and he asked me out. The first date was beyond awkward; he told me he loved me and said that he was glad he would never have to date anyone again. I burst out crying; it was incredibly overwhelming. He even made a joke about something his father said before the date; he told him not to propose to me. I went home crying my eyes out. He was pretty full on and he even tried to kiss me which felt too much; considering.
I decided to give him a chance so we began to go out; I told him what happened to me and he was very supportive but I honestly don't think he truly understands. He has a mild case of Aspergers and he has been open with me about it. He's a Mama's boy and if we are together he texts her 3 to 4 times in a couple of hours. He constantly needs to hold me in his arms which is nice but it's too much for me because I need my space; I've even told him that but he doesn't seem to listen.
When it comes to intimacy, he doesn't want me to touch his genitals and he had told me that he doesn't want to touch mine. Even if I touch his leg he cringes and pulls away; he touches my breasts even though I tell him not to as I'm not comfortable with him doing it. We have been dating for seven months and I've been having doubts since the beginning but that could be because of my past or that simply he's not the right guy.
He sends me gifts and tells me he loves me via text a million times a day as well as he misses me and it gets tiresome for me. If I don't reply straight away, he re-sends the text a couple more times. When he has time off he never does anything with his time and when we are together he just wants to cuddle while I want to do things like go for walks or play games with him such as Xbox but he's not bothered. I feel like I'm settling and I really don't want to do that; it's not fair on me or him.
The worst thing though is that he has decided that I'm the ONE for him but I'm not so sure. He wants children by the end of his 20's;he's 24 now but he cringes at the thought of me getting pregnant. I just don't understand him at all.
Phew, sorry about the length, I just wanted to make sure I got everything down.
If you can offer me some advice then I'm grateful for your insight; I'm just confused.
Best Answer
He sounds like a sweet guy but from your post doesn't sound like he's the one and your gut is telling you that. It may hurt initially to break up but it may be the right thing to do. Best of luck to you and please keep us updated on what you decide..
We do tend to take the easiest road at times but it only makes it harder down the road. Life is to short, know what I mean?
Thankyou for replying.:)
Yes, I believe you are right.
I think I've pushed it to the back of my mind and refused to think of it that way but maybe breaking up with him is the best course of action.
I definitely will and thanks once again.
Yes, I believe you are right.
I think I've pushed it to the back of my mind and refused to think of it that way but maybe breaking up with him is the best course of action.
I definitely will and thanks once again.
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