Facebook and old relationships

[bethb496]

I just signed up for Facebook a few months ago.  It's a lot of fun.  I've started searching for people I know and then I started looking for old boyfriends and I past husband.  I found my ex-husband and an old boyfriend.  I've sent both of them friend invites but haven't heard anything back.  I wrote my ex that I have no hidden agenda (I don't want him back) and that past is the past.  I'm just sort of curious how he is doing (he's on wife #4).  I don't want him back, that's not why I invited him as a friend.  The other guy, I just wrote something like "it's been so long, hope you are well".  NOTE: I don't want either back but I did like them as people.  It's been over 10 years for both so I thought we would over everything.  

Did I do something wrong?  I know it takes a while for people to read their email and it is vacation time.  I'm just trying to get my friends up on my Facebook.  

[GRose]

I don't think you did anything wrong but maybe they just don't feel it is nessecary to be your facebook friend. Also, it is possible that they are worried it may upset their current girlfriend/wife to see that they are friends with an ex.
I would just leave it alone though.

[mami1323]

I agree with GRose on this, they may find it uncomfortable to accept you because of current relationships.  Regardless if you don't want anything in return.  To them it may be a shut book already and they may not want to open it again.  Don't take any offense to it, just keep it moving and focus on yourself and not on what others are thinking.

[bethb496]

I can understand what you are both saying.  I've moved on to other men too.  I'm just trying to get as many friends on facebook as possible.  It's like a game to see who can get the most.  I would take their current wives/girlfriends as friends too.  I'm no threat as I understand boundaries (plus there's nothing there emotion wise anymore).  I was just wondering if I did a social faux paus.  Do you think I did?

[bethb496]

Plus, I'm kind of curious what they have been up to lately.  Just curious, nothing more.  

[treazzure007]

bethb496, there are plenty of other people on facebook that you don't have to know at all to become a "friend" to.  they'd accept your friend requests.  if you're competing for numbers sake, then you wouldn't need those 2 men to build up your friend's anyway.  perhaps, you are a past chapter of each of their lives.  i know my exes and past classmates are alive and thriving is great news to hear, but doesn't make me add them as contacts and friends on my myspace acct.  be reasonable

[bethb496]

Trezzure, I only want people I know on my facebook.  Both guys are now my friends.  I know what you are saying, and it may sound weird, but I really did like my ex-husband as a person.  I like keeping up with what people are doing.