Does this sound like a narcissist? My boyfriend makes promises and no follow through. Tells small and big lies. Has cheated on me (not physically). Cries and has a total breakdown when I break up with him, but has no follow through on his promises to make things better. He says he loves me, but only really when I've threatened to leave him. Talks about marriage and having kids, but is totally emotionally distant most of the time. It's making me crazy!! Last time I broke up with him, he pretended to fall down the stairs and black out. He texted me 27 times in 1 hr when I was out with my friends. It was insane! If only that kind of effort went into making the relationship work. He seems emotionally unstable sometimes. He always compliments my looks, to the point of annoyance. He talks about all the rich people he knows, and loves talking about himself! My dad doesn't like him and thinks he's a loose canon. My friends don't like him either. They get tired of him always talking about himself and treating me bad. He was married before and had an affair on his wife. He totally blames the demise of the marriage on her. He talks about how crazy another ex of his was. I'm starting to see the pattern, and that it likely wasn't these other people at all, but was him. I am planning to end this relationship, but I don't know why it's still so hard!
Ending relationships are seldom easy when you care about someone. Letting go and learning to know when to let go is about emotional, spiritual and mental growth. Don't expect it to be easy and don't expect him to let it happen easily. Whether he is narcisstic or not doesn't really matter. What does matter is the fact that you are allowing this relationship to dominate your life. Start by making some tough decisions about what you want for you and your future and then start laying down some boundries for yourself. Decide that you are worth better and then don't settle for anything less. Good luck! Sherri
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