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Avatar universal

I need an outsider.

  Honestly I just want to be single. I don't want any more commitment with anyone. I just want to enjoy being single. I'm not concerned about "mingling." I don't mind having a good conversation, just hanging out and just doing something. Any guy that approaches me now.. I clearly state;;

                                         "I'm not looking for commitment nor am I wanting sex."
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I met a man I will call him; Harry. I've known Harry for two months now. Without me really needing to tell you I caught feelings for Harry, and at this point they are VERY strong, but I still do not want a relationship, but I still want to speak with Harry, I would love to get to know even more about him.

Things got physical; holding hands,kissing,pet names, touching, and oral.

As of two days ago...I sent Harry a message telling him though I liked him I needed to step away, from confusion, from him because I didn't see a true purpose in us continuing whatever this is..I definitely cant say "FRIENDSHIP".
He just asked me {{WHY}}}..>> 4 times << and I just said I don't see a purpose, and with his 4th " why? " I got kind of annoyed and just say "Bye Harry -.-"

He says okay "KK Later."

                     So I'm sound in my decision for ...several hours. lol ... Then I get to a point where I'm alone, and when I am alone I think TO MUCH.          
         I wondered things like; "Is he thinking about me? Does he still have feelings for me? I wish he would step out of himself and just say something to me, a call ,a text."

So instead of "Waiting" I sent a message only to see if he would answer, and he did ...I was a little surprised he even responded. I say "Harry." he says "Sup."

You know I really just wanted to see if he would respond. I didn't want anything else. I feed him some BS  when he asked "What did I really want?"

He says "Well, we aren't suppose to be talking. So lets keep it that way"

So I stopped talking, but than LESS then fifteen minutes later ... again... just to see if he will respond, I say something else and he responds again.

I suppose he responds because he DOES miss me. I still really want to get to know him.  I love talking to him, he's so fun to be around. I like being around him. I don't care for the physical. Its nice, but un-needed. I've told him that, and he is the same way, but knowing that we have feelings...and then being alone and having feelings..things happen, but they don't have to.. That's understood.

I don't know.

                      I just need an outsider. I want to hear what you guys have to say about this entire ordeal.






              

even before I encounter Harry

4 Responses
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1974283 tn?1425609124
I don't have the time to go over that older post unfortunately but I wanted to put my own thoughts into this.

I guess the first thing that I want you to think about is.. Have you ever been in a serious relationship? If no, is it because you wanted to be "alone", if yes, did you want to be "alone"?

I am 20 years old. I had my own problems and I grew up in a very nontraditional way. My relationships with family are different than "normal" people and I don't often relate to a lot of people simply because through everything I have been through I have still been able to understand that though I am different, different is still completely normal.

I am young, but never felt young until recently. When I was 18 I knew I didn't need to settle down. I didn't need to meet anyone or have babies because I judged people who settled too quickly and I judged the behaviours of people were close to me because they were unhappy about their decisions. I liked guys, yes. I was on dating sites but I never went out. I was alone. I wanted to be alone. But you know what? I liked it because I got a lot of attention. Guys like girls who can be on their own without being needy and stuff. That was me.. I had no interest in guys doing anything for me... I felt no attraction to guys, thought I might be gay, but then I realized... I am turning into an adult and, well, I can be who ever I want to be. I don't have to impress anyone.

At that point in my life I started going on dates, but the full out traditional dates.. Where on those dates I wouldn't even let those guys kiss me good night. I met about 5 guys in a months time and I was bored. I felt like I wanted to be alone again.. I wanted my own time. But then I found this man.. He was tall, he was a little on the bigger side, he has blue eyes, he can sing, and he has a great relationship with his mother and dammit, I fell in love. I am young, but I didn't think this would happen. If you go through my old facebook messages with boys it was always "maybe you should go, we aren't really getting anywhere" but I don't remember sending this, all I remember thinking was "this boy gave up on me.." but, I was giving them the opportunity to... Now don't think I'm telling you to be all crazy either..

This boy that I fell in love with? Well, we are still together. I don't care how mad we are at each other we still have to sleep in the same bed. We bought a house together. We have a fur baby and are planning children in the next 1-3 years.

I never thought I would be here. I never thought I would care. I never in a million years thought someone could love me like I love them, and I think it's a matter of time before you find the same thing.
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Avatar universal
Ditto AnnieBrooke.

Sounds a lot like the other post.
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134578 tn?1693250592
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Avatar universal
By the way I'm in my early twenties, he's in his late twenties.
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