I need help and advice- How do I break up?

[Hypnoash6]

I have been dating my bf for almost two years. I met him when I moved to Florida for grad school. I moved in with him in May because I really wanted to see if this was meant to be or I should move back with my family up north. I gave it a chance and Ive been miserable/ unhappy. My fieldwork is over in 4 weeks and I wanted to leave the opportunity to maybe get hired there or if I do not I want to move back to NJ. The only problem is the lease for our apartment is up the end of November and he thinks we are moving into his parents place, tonight he asked if we where we were moving the furniture from our place in his parents. I just said I dont know yet, depends if I get a job or not. I really want to move back home, I am not happy.

I already told my best friend I want her to fly down at the end of fieldwork to drive back up north with me. I feel so guilty and I am hiding something from my boyfriend. I wanted to live here for the next 4 weeks but I really feel like I have to tell him. The problem is I dont know when to tell him or how to tell him? Its going to be hard to tell him, especially since he is not receptive to me talking to him about things like that. I was thinking of sending him a facebook message so he can read it on his on (I know it sounds silly but he always does better when he can think on his own). Should I wait to tell him or tell him soon? I have been seeing a psychologist to have someone to talk but do not see her until Monday. I want to talk to her, to see what she thinks I should do but I dont know if I should wait. What should I do?

[Hypnoash6]

I feel better I told him but Ive been very sad all day. :-(

[nomathando]

You know the saying honesty is the best policy, there is nothing better than telling the truth. You should tell him trust me you will feel good about yourself even though it may hurt him but it will do him good rather than staying with someone that doesn't love him, that would be unfair to him.

I've been in the same position as you but my ex-bf and i were going to get married but i also felt miserable but now that i've broken up with him i could never be more happy, i can even look foward to the day, though i miss him sometimes but it was the best decision i have ever made.

[teko]

I am so glad for you that this worked out the way it did. Now you can look forward to moving on with your life and the new adventures that lie ahead. Congrats, good luck and most of all, be happy!

[RockRose]

I just went back and refreshed myself by reading your profile.

The two of you are not a match.  You'll both be relieved when this relationship is over,  whether you stay there for the next several weeks or not,  it will be a relief to each of you to part ways.  

And that's good.

[RockRose]

Great,  hypno.  It worked out great.  Both of you are ready to part - it sounds like he's been unhappy too and my guess is he'll be fine with you living there until November,   and you can have a very amicable breakup.  

You can move in with your friend or stay where you are,  it doesn't sound like there will be any drama either way.  

Sounds like a relief to me.  

[Hypnoash6]

I did it!   I was crying before I told him and he asked whats wrong. I told him basically i have been really homesick and miss home. I want to move closer to home. I said i feel guilty not living closer to my family. I said i would ask him to move up with me but i know hes happy here with all his family and friends and also his new job. His response, he just said yeah it would be hard for me to move because my job is here and since then hes been acting normal with me, he didnt seem upset at all. I told my friend and she said what did he do when I started to cry, I told her he just sat there. He didnt even do anything or react when I was crying.
This next week I am going to decide if I need to move out and stay with my friend for 3 weeks until my fieldwork is over. My mom said I might enjoy my last 3 weeks if I move in with my friend. I still dont know...

[specialmom]

Yep, I agree.  Ask your friend to ask her room mate if you can move in for a couple of weeks or go ahead and ask your parents to loan you some money and go to a hotel.  Why give him a reason to be mad at you and he might feel used if you are just sticking around there because you only have a bit of time left.  He may say it is okay for you to stay, you never  know.  What about having your parents come and get your big stuff and drive it back home for you while you finish up?  That would make it easier to stay at your friends as you wouldn't have anything but your clothes and things like that.  I'm sure your parents would be willing to help you.  good luck

[Redhenful]

You have to be honest with him.. face to face.
Its hard.... there will be tears... but he deserves the truth now.
Just like you would want to know ...

[Hypnoash6]

I left out that I feel that if I tell him within the next two weeks he is going to want me to move out. My friend has offered if I need to move in with her for a few weeks it would be fine, as long as her roomate is okay with it.