Is she being honest about not being pregnant?

[Wibbley]

I am currently in a long distance relationship, well its currently more casual than an actual relationship at this point but we text regularly etc, till I can get a chance to come down and see her.
We had unprotected intercourse about 2 months ago, during which i used to pull out method. (stupid I know) Anyway, this was a few days before her period which she told me she had. I of course, asked her to take the pill and all that after we had sex as well.
Since I've been away though, I'm worried about her being pregnant so I asked her about having a test, just to check and to make sure the morning after pill worked. She got quite angry and I found out there and then that she almost had a baby once before but got rid of it because her partner at the time made her. After that she was harassed by her friends about it, saying she was a terrible person, etc, so all around not very good stuff.
As a result of this she says she does not want a baby anymore, not after that experience.

So clearly that's a no go to talk about that, she also said she had her second period as well, but seemed a bit evasive when i asked her about it. She did say that she is not pregnant and said she is certain of that.
....  its constantly bugging me, I need to know for certain! I was thinking about waiting a few months, and if she says about her period then maybe she is being truthful, but I just feel uneasy about the whole thing, there's something not quite right. Why wont she take a test if she is certain she isn't pregnant, whats the big deal? She says she does not want a baby! But she refuses to take a test, why? That sounds suspicious to me.
To make matters worse, lately shes been having sleeping problems lately which she thinks could be medication, which I do happen to know can be an early sign. I asked her if she has any other symptoms and she is evasive about that as well.

I'm sorry if I sound paranoid, I'm not very good at explaining it, but I am not ready to become a father! I have not being asking her constantly, this conversation came up a couple of times, and then her symptoms came up alter, so I'm not constantly on her about it, but it preoccupies my thought far too much, I really need to know!
Can anyone lend their advise? Thanks

[specialmom]

Hi.  To me, you sound basically just anxious.  Being a bit unreasonable.  You had sex with her, unprotected sex.  YOU made that choice, right?  So, now you are stuck with worry and anxiety.  She's not bugging you.  She's gone on with her own life.  But you can't let it go.  Even kind of being angry with her when it is unwarranted.  So, I would work on your own anxiety and leave this poor girl alone.  We live life and as we go, it is full of lessons.  This is a good one for you--  that casual sex may not be your thing.  It takes an emotional toll on you.  But continuing to 'try to talk to her' is like harassment.  So, let her be and take the lesson you were intended to have from this.  good luck

[AnnieBrooke]

She has said she is not pregnant, and that she had a period, in fact, two periods.  Most guys would heave a big sigh of relief and say a prayer of thanks at this point, yet you are thinking this is some kind of weird evidence of a hidden pregnancy. Why would she lie?  She would need your help if she was pregnant.  

It kind of sounds like you are fantasizing she is pregnant to explain other things going on in the relationship, such as her speaking to you on the phone in a way you identify as "evasive."  Maybe she just doesn't like being called a liar and is beginning to find this long-distance relationship stuff tiresome and hasn't figured out a way to tell you yet.

Assume she is telling you the truth about no pregnancy, and try to figure out what is giving you so much unquantifiable anxiety that you won't take no for the relief that it is.  If women get pregnant, they talk to their partner first and foremost.  Try to calm down.

[AnnieBrooke]

Women who are pregnant are sleepy, not sleepless.  I am sorry you feel you "happen to know can be an early sign," it's not.  (My husband's secretary would fall asleep in his face when he was talking to her in the middle of the day, when she was pregnant.)  

Anyway, here is the question.  If she was pregnant, why would she not tell you?  Please re-think your logic.  If she was pregnant by you, it is much more likely she would want to do some problem-solving with you.  Your interpretation of her as being evasive is probably just you seeing her pulling away, because you are not leaving the topic alone out of your own fears for your own skin and none for her.

Try to let this go.  Even if your worst fears were realized and she is pregnant, you cannot change that fact.  And if you are the father, well, you did have sex.  But I don't think any of this is true, I think you are simply taking counsel of your fears and trying to control her from a distance so you won't be afraid.

[Wibbley]

Thanks for the reply.
Well, so I have heard before, with insomnia being a possible symptom. But as you say I could be completely wrong.
I think you are right about the fear aspect on my end however, its just the whole whole reluctance to have a test thing. If she is dead set on preventing pregnancy, surly a test would be a wise step? She may not be aware she is pregnant!

But I hear what you say, I'm trying to let it go... But the whole 'What if?" keeps coming back in my thoughts... Its stupid I know, I just like to know what we're in for, that's all