I have been living with my boyfriend for about 6 months now. I really do love him, but we've been fighting a lot recently. I've suffered from depression in the past, and seem to live better and be happier when I am NOT on medication and just meditate or talk my problems out. Therefore, I give him the benefit of the doubt that I am the one starting the fights because of my slight mood swings, and accept that I am not listening all the time, and that I need to work on things.
After months of accepting that am usually wrong concerning our arguments, I've finally realized that maybe he is actually manipulating me. He would never mean to do this because he is almost annoyingly in love with me, but he does have a tendency to win arguments easily (he's Italian). Now, I become agitated, frustrated, and annoyed when an argument starts because I see that HE actually starts most of them by picking on me. And this hasn't helped our sex life.
I find myself never initiating sex, he always does. In fact, he only touches me in a sexual way, never interested in cuddling or just embracing. I feel guilty and bad that I'm just not as interested in having sex with him as I SHOULD be, seeing that I love him. I'm frustrated and feel worn out. And after thinking about the past few months of him dominating ALL of our arguments, he annoys the hell out of me to be honest. He is always concerned that I'm not "putting out" enough, and that I "never get horny." I actually do get aroused often, but not necessarily by thinking about him...
I don't know what to do. Can anyone give me advice? Thank you for reading this.