My husband just recently started working as a bouncer in a strip club. He wasnt able to find any other work. I live 5 hours away from him and the distance makes it really hard. I trust him and i know he loves me very much. We have been through different situations that have proven how much he truly loves me. But Im not sure about how i feel about letting him work there. Knowing that he is surronded by naked women who arent the classiest type bothers me. When we were separated he went to the strip club frequently with his friends so that must mean he is attracted to the idea of these woman. Just want other peoples opinions about this.
Well, working at a strip club when there has been trouble in your marriage is not the most confidence-inducing move he could make. If the money is REALLY good and he REALLY is eager to move to where you are and he's REALLY stuck in the town where he is and this is the ONLY way he can make the money he needs, that's one thing. But even then it seems kind of wrong-headed of him to put himself into a job where he will see a lot of half-naked women right at a time when he has promised to try to work on his estranged marriage. If the only reliable job he can get in this economy is to be a bouncer at a strip club, why can't he be a bouncer at a strip club in the town where you are?
I agree. I am wondering how much money he needs to move in with you. Enough to rent a Uhaul? You're already living somewhere, so he can move in with you, right? Then he can look for work once there.
I think there are things we just say no to. Such as it would have been good money for me to 'dance' as a stripper when I was in college. I needed cash bad. I wouldn't do that though. (as a made up example). Some jobs/things just probably shouldn't be an option if the will cause problems with us or our partners.
Anyway, if jobs are so bad in that town that the ONLY thing available is a strip club job--- he needs to get out of that town sooner rather than later and I'd get a plan together to do that.
You two are newly working on being a couple again, you don't need this to work against that. good luck and I do hope it works out for you two,.
Until you got to the part where he was going to that strip club frequently even before he was paid to do it, I didn't see a huge problem.
I see one now. He has a problem with wanting to be around strippers, and now he's convinced you that's the only job in town. Really? There are a LOT of jobs for a good "bouncer" type, one of them being working for a promotions company that runs public events and there aren't many naked women at those.
Well, I tended to give him a bye on the question of why he had gone to a strip club since they were estranged for a while and not living in the same town and only recently decided to try again at being married. It seemed logical that if there were a regular who looked like good bouncer material, it might be natural for him to be the one they asked if he wanted the job if they needed a bouncer.
That said, however, it just does not seem like he is knocking himself out to move to be with you. Don't know what the story is of course, since you only posted once, but if I were married to someone who was bouncing drunks and rowdies at a strip club, I would ask him to come bounce at a strip club in my town and to live with me, so I knew where he was after work.
I have nothing but the Utmost Faith, Trust and Belief in my Husband - but I would be QUITE taken aback if He were to be/ or wanted to be a bouncer in a strip club as I would find it hard to believe/imagine/nderstand there are not other jobs available. Times are hard I know, but I betcha that a bouncer in a strip club isn't making the greatest of wages and that there are other jobs available that would pay as well as that one.
I trust my Husband completely - but still I know men like naked women (nature) and I would not appreciate/like or even tolerate my Husband working in a "naked women establishment". This would not even come up in my Own Relationship and I wonder - why it should in Yours??
I also wonder if You are getting back together - why He can't find a job near You and commence to be with You now.
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