l can swear my wife vagina has become really loose and l cant stand it any more: wat a a waste of time having sex it has become...l love her, have discussed with her, but she hasne done anything (also not knowing wat she shld do)... l dread sex, at times so much water comes out l cant feel a thing but l try to be sensitive and just hang in there, think about porn thats how l come. Now how long can l do this, l do l tell point blank that its loose. It wasnt like that before.... l have a normal 16 cm ****; that should work fine right. Is she cheating with someone with huge ****, l dont wanna accuse her without reason. how do l work around this
Well, know that this is a sensitive subject that you will need to handle delicately. Has she had any children? that certainly can change things in that area.
I guess you could tell her about something you read about kegals (go on line and read something about it) and tell her it sounds cool and she could do some of those for fun. Those are the kinds of things you can do while driving in the car or sitting at your desk.
But you will want to gently explore this with her because if you present it like you did here, she'll be too hurt to want sex at all. And trust me, she might be saying she's not enjoying it all that much either. good luck
This is usually related to aging and childbearing and doesn't necessarily mean someone is sleeping around, however, this can occur with frequent sex.
Now, I am not sure if the problem is that she is naturally lubricating too much and then you aren't able to get friction OR if that is happening and her vaginal walls are loose. If it is a lubricating issue, she should consult her GYN Specialist about that because Kegels are going to do nothing to help that. Kegels do indeed tighten the vagina, but they have nothing to do with the vaginal muscles. They strengthen the pelvic floor muscles that surround the vagina. There are also other alternatives she can discuss with her GYN Specialist, i.e.vaginal cones, weights, vaginal wall electrical stimulation, surgery (in EXTREME cases).
Ben-wa balls can help too just like Kegels.
I am not sure how open she is about these things, but don't let this fester too long. Just sit down with her, start off by telling her you love her and then let her know this isn't easy to say and then tell her you aren't getting totally satified when you have sex because of the lack of friction. Definitely don't say....."Hey, your vagina's loose and you need to do something about this." DO NOT have this discussion RIGHT BEFORE, DURING OR RIGHT AFTER sex.
Have you tried experiementing with different positions? i.e. her on top?
With all due respect, you have many issues you need to address. After reviewing your prior posts, you obviously are already cheating, and have, in the past, become overly anxious about HIV. That's usually guilt related.
This issue with your wife needs addressed, cheating certainly isn't the answer. Your wife deserves better than that. Like others have said, you need to approach this VERY gently with her, because, there's no way around it being hurtful, just as the nature of the topic.
You say in one breath that she hasn't done anything, then right after, say she doesn't know what to do. Perhaps a little gentle encouragement from you, with offers of support would be helpful. This isn't something you should just expect her to deal with, then come back to you when it's all fixed, all tightened up. That's kind of how your OP comes off...very insensitive, very harsh, uncaring and selfish.
Your wife's OB/GYN would be the most logical starting place. There ARE different things that could be causing this, and there are different solutions, as the other posters explained.
This issue aside, you need to decide whether or not you're willing to be faithful and committed to your wife. If not, you should do the right thing, and move on. When you take those vows, there are no conditions behind the fidelity part. There are plenty of couples who face huge obstacles in their sex lives, including impotence, disabilities, etc...and while it may be stressful, and challenging, it's not an excuse to look elsewhere for sexual satisfaction.
Just imagine if your wife found out about your indiscretions, after you had the conversation with her about her vaginal issue. She would feel SO bad, and her self confidence would go straight to the pot. That's just not fair.
I'm not trying to be harsh, but really, these are things you need to REALLY do some soul searching about, and do the right thing by your wife, and your marriage.
nursegirl--yu talkingabout an issue that happened 8 months back, l am long repented over that my sister that why l want to fix the issues that lead me in that position.. so dont quickly judge me... l love her, it could the the over lubrication, that the muscles thats very possible, but l am not sure. we have a one year old baby. l love my wife, she is quite dominant and she might be defensive about this. But l am sure she might not be enjoying as well. how do l fix the water from coming down there as a gush. If yu are going to revert to my past mistakes with giving advise on the issues leading to infidelity --than wat do yu want a husband to do.
I'm thinking you've received all the information you can on this forum regarding this issue.
While sexual happiness is included in a content marriage, it is just part of the whole picture. We marry in sickness and health and this is an issue you will need to learn to deal with without jumping to a conclusion that she cheated. Not fair to her.
But you've received practical advice from BOTH nursegirl and Londres on things to do and I think that is the most we can do here. good luck
Okay just so you know it's scientifically proven that vaginas don't get "loose" there are plenty of articles about it. Now it's just like a rubber band so with age and many pregnancies it won't bounce back to its original elasticity but if she has only one child I don't know her age but it sounds to me as this isn't really her problem because she is well lubricated which she should be before inter course but it does sound to me that your penis is not that large so when she gets super wett you don't feel it as much. When your well lubricated (which she should be) and warmed up which she should also be the muscles relax more for insertion if she was overly tight it's probably because her vagina is dry and not ready for inter course which probably means she doesn't want to have sex with you. Maybe u should try a penis enlargement pills don't know if that works but her being aroused and wett isn't an issue your penis is
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