Hello and thank you in advance for reading my post and possibly helping me with my problem.
I've been with my girlfriend for 6 months now. She has her quirks just like everyone else (for example - when she goes to bed she puts in ear plugs, wears noise-canceling headphones, a mask over her eyes and does not want any physical contact whatsoever so I have to stay far over on my side of the bed).
To be fair, I have my quirks/faults/shortcomings too. I can be impatient at times and I struggle with communicating my feelings. She tells me I don't act my age and that I'm not as "intellectually stimulating" as she'd like me to be. (To which I want to say, you didn't meet me in a science laboratory, you met me in a dance class.)
The problem is that lately, her nagging is relentless and unending. If I miss a spot in a pot that I cleaned, she shows it to me. If I don't clean a glass well enough she complains so I have to clean it again. BTW, we don't live together - this just happens when I stay over her place.
We were out for a bike ride one night when I asked if she minded if we pull over so I could buy a cup of coffee because I was cold. She told me that she DID mind! Like a fool, I kept riding and didn't get it. I told her when we got home, though, that in the future if I want to have a cup of coffee I am getting one - it wasn't a request - it was just letting her know I wanted to pull over.
The final straw took place recently when we were at her friends' home one day/evening. I had only met them once before briefly but I did my best to be attentive, kind, charming, and engaged for the 5 hours we were there. At one point, with just a few minutes to go before we left, I found myself sitting off to the side with no one talking to me or even looking at me, so I checked my phone to see if I had any messages. I must have looked at it for 3 minutes tops.
When we got home later she lit into me saying how embarrassed she was that I checked my phone and how rude of me to do so in her friends' home!
I said to her the other night that I feel like I am living in a minefield lately and that I need her to lay off for a couple of weeks because it's driving me crazy. She seemed dumbstruck and asked me, "How will I get credit if I don't point out your mistakes?".
I replied, "What do you want credit for? Allowing me to be imperfect? Allowing me to be a human being?"
She didn't know what to say. And I don't know what to think of someone who wants credit for NOT disciplining me or nagging me when she feels I am did something wrong.
The Content on this Site is presented in a summary fashion, and is intended to be used for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to be and should not be interpreted as medical advice or a diagnosis of any health or fitness problem, condition or disease; or a recommendation for a specific test, doctor, care provider, procedure, treatment plan, product, or course of action. Med Help International, Inc. is not a medical or healthcare provider and your use of this Site does not create a doctor / patient relationship. We disclaim all responsibility for the professional qualifications and licensing of, and services provided by, any physician or other health providers posting on or otherwise referred to on this Site and/or any Third Party Site. Never disregard the medical advice of your physician or health professional, or delay in seeking such advice, because of something you read on this Site. We offer this Site AS IS and without any warranties. By using this Site you agree to the following Terms and Conditions. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your physician or 911 immediately.