Regrets

[specialmom]

Another question FOR FUN and just to share.  I was thinking about this today.  You never know how life is going to work out.  I was wondering if you ever had a relationship that you didn't handle well or  you broke off that you regret.  You may be happy now and everything but curious if there is any relationship out there that you blew or ended yourself that in hindsight might not have been one you should have.  (even though I believe life works out as it should . . .  )

[adgal]

I have "the one that got away" for sure.  Now, I should preface this by saying that my husband is completely the right person for me and I love him dearly.  So I guess that means no real regrets as if I had stayed with my first love, I wouldn't be with my husband.  However, I will admit, I do still think about that first very serious real love from time to time.

It was one of those situations where the chemistry was incredible and we too were hot and heavy for about a year.  We were fantastic on every level.  We ended it because he was planning a year traveling and I was not ok with being left behind for that length of time.  I was young, impatient and not willing to wait.  So, we ended it, although it was amicable.  Truthfully, he also did not want to be "tied down" during his travels, so we really were in agreement that this had to come to an end.  I never forgot him though, and will admit to having wondered if what might have been.  Still, life has turned out well, so I cannot complain.  So just one of those things I wonder about I guess.

[specialmom]

Sometimes it is good to have boundaries and be able to know when to call it quits.  When someone causes great aggravation, it may not be worth the energy to stay in contact with them.  

WE shouldn't feel guilty when that is the case.  It's called taking care of yourself!

[teddybears4ever2]

For me there are no regrets in my marriage.  I do however have a handful of friends that I shouldn't have stayed friends with as long as I did.  My high school best friend was the worst one.  I grew up and she didn't.  I tried to string her along, but I had no luck in doing so.  She is intent to stay a kid and live with her parents forever.  I on the other hand, moved out when to college, and got married.  
She was mad at me, because I changed.  She stayed the same.  Every few years she tried to contact me, and I used to answer.  Now I don't.

[lovemykids465]

I regret how I ended one relationship. I was young and a jerk. I do not regret that it ended but rather how it ended.

[nursegirl6572]

Regrets can be healthy...it means you learned something from a situation, and in YOUR case, Brice, would like to have a "re-do" to spare your loved ones the pain your actions caused.  That's a good thing.

[brice1967]

One regret that I'll have for the rest of my life is what I did to my wife and marriage.  Not a day goes by without me beating myself up over this.  Not only did I do this to my wife, family, marriage, and friends.... I went against everything I believe in.

I so wish I could have a re-do there..... damn it!

[mami1323]

No regrets on my past relationships.  They didn't work out because they weren't supposed to and the guys I was with weren't good guys for me.  My ex boyfriend before I met Richie was way too young for me.  Even though we didn't end on bad terms it would never have worked out because of his immaturity.  I do regret though getting involved with a co-worker of mine because he wound up having a girlfriend.  I acted like a stupid, desperate idiot with him at some points and that's what I regret.  I eventually made him look like a fool but not after I made a fool of myself a time or two.  I have some regrets when it comes to my current relationship.  Some times I regret giving him a second chance after his affair.  But we are happy now.  He's changed so much and I do feel had I not given this another shot I would've regretted that.  Just random thoughts though.

[khawkins]

I truely have no regrets with any of my past relationships, even my marriage that ended that made me feel like I was an inch off of the ground...

I found out my husband of only a year and a half had a girlfriend while he was away on course.  He called me 2 days before he came home at Christmas to tell me that he wasn't sure if he wanted to be with me or with his new fling (that lived more than halfway accross the country).  I had 2 small children at the time - 6mos, and 2yrs - so I tried to fight for my marriage.  In the summer of 09 I decided it was time to end my marriage, I just couldn't do it anymore.  I was seeing a theripist and told her I couldn't do it, but I also couldn't manage to come up with the courage to tell my husband that I was done, I hated thinking of myself as a 26 year old who was a single mother, and divorced after only 2 years of marriage, like I did something wrong, it was me and not him.  In the meantime, I found a new job so I would be able to support my family without my husband around, and that is where I met Jeff.  Didn't know it at the time, but he is man of my dreams, and the one I am to be with for the rest of my life.  

If I would have left my husband when I realized it, I would have moved back with my family and never would have met Jeff, and wouldn't be having our first child together as we speak.  

Living your life, as terrible as it is sometimes, makes you who you are today and I wouldn't change it for the world!!!

[Londres70]

NO REGRETS.   I handled or ended things in the past the best way I could back then.  With the wisdom I have now,  I would definitely have handled or ended some situations differently.  

What I got now I sure can't imagine it being any better with anyone from my past.  

[specialmom]

Ha, I read what I wrote and I meant every measure I ended up using to judge a good guy .  .  .  not that I ended up using the guy.  I wrote that the wrong way and HAD to clarify . . .  LOL

[specialmom]

I'll share one of mine.  I lived in an apartment complex in my early 20's that had a lot of single people living there.  Oh, there was a young man that I thought was BEAUTIFUL.  He was like my perfect male specimen.  Immediate attraction, intensity, and connection right away.  BUT, he was also attractive to a lot of other people.  He was not good for me but he was like a drug.  Oh, I couldn't get enough of him.  (young and dumb is all I can claim about myself at that point).  We were semi hot and heavy and he was semi hot and heavy with two other girls I found out . . .  right before he told me he was moving . . .  the NEXT day.  Oh yeah, I bump into him with another girl from the complex and was flabbergasted.  I mean . . .  I had no idea (but should have).  Then I think he's called me to come and talk about THAT when he says "I'm moving".  And when he said the next day . . .  I couldn't believe it.  Boo hoo hoo hoo is how I felt.  (thank goodness he moved and it didn't go any further as he was NOT a good guy in retrospect . . .  just beautiful).  So, he packs up to leave and there I am at his car as he is getting ready to pull away crying.  Bye bye hot man.  I go home and literally the next day meet another man in the complex.  Fairly good looking, super successful, and NICE.  Oh and best of all, totally INTO ME.  We did go out and we did start dating.  I wasn't ready to do this as I was still thinking of the HOT guy who moved (who didn't really give a rats behind about me) . . .  so I just went through the motions with this person that by every measure I ended up using, was a GREAT guy.  Finally, I just told him "yeah, I'm not into this."  He was very sad.  

Now I bring this story up as I think about it often.  Had I not been hurting over Mr. Wrong, that could have been Mr. Right.  Fate . . . and destiny.  I've wondered for a long time what would have happened between he and I had I not been in limbo emotional land after my bad boy/gorgeous man left town.  I'm happily married now and two decades or more have passed ---  and life is good.  But you always think about the twists and turns of life.  That movie 'sliding doors' comes to mind.  

Anyway, just sharing when I think that I shouldn't have treated someone so carelessly at one point in my life and wondering if anyone else has ever had such a situation.