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Sex and Desire
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This patient support community is for discussions relating to relationships, abstinence, arousal problems, birth control, cohabitation, commitment, communication, couples counseling, desire, sexual technique, and sexually transmitted diseases (STDs).

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Sex and Desire

Hello everyone.
  Recently my boyfriend and I of a  year and a half broke up. Before we got together I wasn't sexually active. I had sex before ( twice ) but I wasn't 100% comfortable with it because of a abd experience when I was younger. But while my boyfriend and I were together I rised above that uncomfortableness and started to really enjoy sex. I was only sleeping with him ,  I was faithful. Towards the end of our relatinship but sexual peak reached it's all time high and I had more desire for sex ( with him ) and increased libido. Now that we are broken up ( it's been about 3 1/2 weeks ) I am having some sexual desires.
i'm not one to go find some complete stranger to relase this sexual frusturation with , and I'd feel awkward sleeping with a friend. I just couldn't do it. I want to meet new people ( men ) but I'm still getting over my ex and still in love with him.
I'm not usre about masturbation , I haven't really explored it fully. Plus it's different from having a man to feed your pleasures...you know what I mean? I'm also afriad that my uncomfortable feeling with men ( in general ) might prove to be a problem now that I don't have someone I fully trust and I've put my walls back up.
In the mean time , what do I do?...Not to be crude but straight up I'm horny...( I've never actualy said that out loud )...I'm not usre if i'm ready yet though. Ahhhg I'm so confused. Any advice would be appreciated.
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Sorry about all the typos!! I always rush my typing.
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You can masterbate nothing wrong with it.The feeling of uncomfortable with men will start agin after you meet another guy.Its called insecurity.If you trust the man whole heartedly you will be more at ease.If not then he is not the one to do the bone dance with;)Give your self time to get over your old love.Then start dating or what evr.Till then go get a dildoe from a sex shop and knock your self out.
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Just a question for you, Do you still have feeling for this guy? If you really need sexual gratification that badly,  could you be able to go with anyone and get it over with? sometimes and this is my particular opinion, some women think that giving out good sex is good enough to keep a man next to them, remember most of the time, for us women sex goes with strings attached, where as guys sex for them MOST of the time is  purely of a physical  nature especially when they are younger, you should be able to know, if your need is just physical, then I suggest to get one of those toys and gratify yourself,  is better than (let me say it without being too judgmental )being promiscuous.
Good luck
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You will be ok. trust me, it'll pass, I guess that you are just lonesome missing what was there and is not anymore, we've all been there at one point in our lifes, It's called "Lessons to be learned in the School of Life"
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You never masturbated?  Wow, most of the time masturbation is better than a man.
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Nope I haven't really masturbated to the extent of really pleasing myself. Sometimes in the heat of the moment ( like when my ex and I , while we were together mind you ) I'd use it as a little foreplay and to show my guy what I wanted him to do. Yes  I do still have feelings for him , I think it might take me a little while to get over them. He was my first love.
I'm still not 100% sure if it's all physical or if I'm missing my ex and sex with him , not just sex in general. I'm not at all the promiscuios (sp?) type. I don't like the idea of one night stands. So I guess for now I'll have to try pleasuring myself. See where that leads.
I don't think it's insecurity really , it's a trust issue with men because of some abuse I had when I was younger. Maybe it is linked to insecurity , but I'm not afraid that they wont like me or be attracted to me , it's more like I'm afriad I wont be able to open up to anyone any time soon. We'll see.
Thanks everyone!
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Avatar_n_tn
there are too many reasons why one night stands are bad (or risky)nowadays. most girls i know (not all) but a good many of them have a great deal of fun pleasing themselves. maybe it's a good time for you to explore all the great things about female sexuality that us guys can't have ! hehe
good luck with your next boyfriend.                l.e.







of course WE have the very best thing for sex...   GIRLS !!!
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