Weird behavior from bf

[catlover8]

OK, I wrote last week about my BF missing my birthday because of work. He said he has to drive to San Antonio with another employee for a training of sorts on some new system that they will be using in his shop. He is a mechanic. Also, they had to pick up a machine for the truck store. Well, I have to say, I am not that suspicious of a person, but some definite questions have come up in the past couple of days. First off. I am pretty sure it would take more than three and a hald hours to get to San Antonio from Gainsville TX. I also found a receipt on his floor from Saturday for the Cavenders in Lewisville with a time stamp of 14:39. I think that is 2:39 in regular time. He was supposidly in San Antonio at that point. He bought a shirt, some socks and a hat. I questioned him about this, and he said he had no idea why the time says that. He then said that he did not buy a shirt but take one back which is clearly untrue because the receipt shows a purchse not an exchange or taking something back. He claims he must just not have been paying attention. We have been fighting over this non stop. He says I just can't trust him and it hurts him. Am I crazy? He is making me feel like I am making this all up in my head. So, he supposible stayed over night in San Antonio and then had class until 4 and came back at 4. Conveniently, he made it back by 7:15 cause he went to a viewing for a funeral at that time. Nothing adds up, but I have no solid proof. he keeps telling me I am making things bad with us because of mu unwarranted suspisions. I don't know what to think anymore. He has shown me zero proof that he was actually at some type of convention. My instincts are telling me there is something wrong, but like I said, no proof.

[catlover8]

I don't get it either. And I don't even think he was cheating. I think he wanted to do something rather than go to my birthday party and the easiest way out was to lie and say he has a work thing. Maybe a friend was in town from out of town and he wanted to go out with them. I don't know and I will never really know. I have spoken with him today, and he seems to take no responsibility in the break up whatsoever. He is trying to turn everything on me. Like he just has so many issues with me that he doesn't know what to do. Me? I thought the issue was him lying. The other weekend, I was at his house and his mother told me that he was a liar and he lies all the time. Let me tell you, he is convincing. The only reason he got caught was because he failed to cover his tracks. Who knows what he was actually doing and I suppose at this point, I shouldn't even care.

[lovemykids465]

Good for you. I hate to see any relationship end but when there is a threat of physical violence it is time to get out! I am not saying he was cheating but it does sound suspicious. What gets me is why do they have to cheat. If you want another woman go, don't  lead me on. And then to lie to cover it up. I just don't get it!

[turkee23]

whats wrong with my english!!...sorry got alot on my mind... my first post is all TYPOS!!!....lol.... my bad!

[catlover8]

Well, here is the update. I found the matching ticket to the receipt. He had maintained through the entire week that he had not purchased a shirt, but in fact had taken one back. He admitted it was a lie, but said that the only reason he lied was because he did not want to deal with me thinking he went out when he was on his trip. He just wanted to get the shirt because he liked it but then lied about it because he didn't want me thinking he went out. Being the little detective that I am, I thought of one thing. Why would the tag be on the floor of his bedroom? You either wear it when you are in San Antonio and take the tag off there or you bring it home and take the tag off when you wear it. My gut tells me there was never any San Antonio. But, it doesn't matter anymore as we had a huge fight and broke up. Terrible things were said. He threatened to hit me, and I told him I would call the cops. Then I walked out. It is over. And you know what? It wasn't even about the lie itself. It was about the fact that he sat there and told me he would never lie to me again because of the last time, and that he had learned his lesson. We would be 100% honest with each other. The whole time he was saying that, he was lying. All about a stupid shirt. And does one really lie about a shirt if not lying to cover up something bigger???

[jenkaye21]

I agree with lovemykids; the receipt is very suspicious.  Of what, who knows??  But I highly doubt that the receipt is wrong, and then the fact is that he is lying.  Lying = something to hide.  Sorry, but that's the way I see it.  I really don't think this guy is worthy of you!!

[lovemykids465]

Wow! I don't know. I would be very suspicious too. The receipt would get to me. But like the ladies said. Bite your tongue for now and keep a careful eye out. But go out and enjoy yourself. Your existence should not revolve around him.

[specialmom]

Hi catlover.  I remember your previous posts and the first one that I had read from you talked about how he was a Jekyll and Hyde kind of guy.  That he can be very nice and then he can switch and be controlling and cruel and even brag that he manipulates you.  You are coming out of a bad period in your life and I give you a hands up salute of praise that you are sober and things are on track.  This relationship isn't going to help keep it there though.  You are very dependent on this man and I think you need to be less so.  You need to experience things for you and not worry about him. Pursue things you enjoy without him.  Stay close to family and friends whether he likes it or not.  Live your life for you and you only.

I'm not saying end this relationship but if it becomes one of constant struggle, then it is time to move on.  I don't know if he said a white lie or a big lie or no lie.  I think the bigger issue is how this relationship as a whole is playing with your mind.  I wish you the best of luck.   You seem like a nice girl and I want you to be happy.

[mami1323]

Yeah I agree, if you don't trust him then you shouldn't stay in this relationship.  You are going to drive a wedge between the two of you.  I'm not saying he isn't doing anything but since you have no proof just yet, then drop the subject.  I always feel that when someone is doing something in the dark it will come to light.  So I would put this in the back of your mind for now and if he is doing something and you find proof, it will all add up.  No point in driving yourself or him nuts until you have solid evidence.  And fyi...I don't think you're crazy, I think we all have some gut instincts and they are usually correct.  However, unless you plan on ending your relationship over these suspicions, I would let it go.

[turkee23]

i think you need to back off.... if you have to proof of him doing anything bad then lighten up... your just going to push him away with assuming he is doing wrong

i wrong in a dealer ship and these guys have to go to classes all over the country all the time..... and the times at my job are never usually right either....so the paper with the time could be wrong.....