What would you do when a friend never gets back to you?

[calmshell]

Do you tell them how it made you feel or just brush it off? My friend wanted to hang out recently and when I suggested a place to go for dinner she said 'maybe if I'm not tired from 2 jobs...' She had just suggested that day, and now was saying 'maybe'? Well I brushed it off and texted her that day as she asked me to, and I asked would you still want to meet for dinner? She never replied, all day or night. It made me feel so low as I"m a good friend. I'd never not get back to her at ALL about a plan we had tentatively made. When I asked her if she got it , she said yes, was just tired :/ Would u say anything?

[Nighthawk61]

If a friend did this to me, i would have to let them know how the indifference makes me feel. It might be a good time to find a new friend (s) maybe at the gym, hobby groups etc. I think that would make the most sense. Good luck. I'm sure you're lovely, and you sound like you would be a good friend and one that many women would appreciate. Do yourself and them a favor and get out there and meet some new friends that have the time and decency to make your friendship feel like it's appreciated. Good luck. Thanks for posting.

[calmshell]

Ty so much for saying that, that I'm a good friend ... that was so kind. We recently hung out only b/c I invited her, and we did have fun, but, when she said you should come see my apartment I still wasn't feeling it, she's been living there a couple months and I don't think she would have been contacting me if we were not hanging out at that moment. I won't write her off, but I'm def. backing away now. I think I will join a group maybe someone will be willing to laugh or show interest in ME too!! ty again N

[Swelter_]

It depends. She may really have been busy, although it never takes too long to respond to a text message if you prioritise it. Also depends on how many times such a thing has happened. I would just let her actions do the talking and let it drop.

If it were important to her, she'd talk to you about it or about meeting some other time etc. Saying "if I'm not too tired from 2 jobs" isn't the greatest response TBH.

[AnnieBrooke]

I'd just take it as a signal and back off the friendship.  Ball is in her court to be friendly.  If you're still mad at that point, say you would like to clear the air, and tell her that you can't handle her mixed messages, one minute friendly the next minute indifferent.  But I'll bet you won't still be mad.  Nobody is worth trying to knock yourself out for when they don't respond, there are other friends who are more fun.

[calmshell]

Thanks Annie so much. It's interesting b/c this was the first time SHE initiated getting together in a year; it has just been me and I was kind of feeling low regarding that - then when I hear from her first finally, and she suggests to hang out,  I'm not sure if it was b/c she didn't like the place I chose or was just  uninterested, but it sure felt like I was beyond 'off the radar' to even let me KNOW, she was not coming that night...she said she was tired but it takes 30 seconds to text, 'let's do another night'.. :/  I really feel this friendship is going downward if I'm the only one ever making effort- oh well. Ty again Annie *hugg

[AnnieBrooke]

I'd just count the friendship as one whose time has bloomed and ended.  It happens.  Don't live in the past.

[Nighthawk61]

If a friend did this to me, i would have to let them know how the indifference makes me feel. It might be a good time to find a new friend (s) maybe at the gym, hobby groups etc. I think that would make the most sense. Good luck. I'm sure you're lovely, and you sound like you would be a good friend and one that many women would appreciate. Do yourself and them a favor and get out there and meet some new friends that have the time and decency to make your friendship feel like it's appreciated. Good luck. Thanks for posting.