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Would like to hear your advice
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Would like to hear your advice

I met this guy last year (in a class) and he seemed nice..we got to spend some time together before the class ended and he seemed honestly like a nice person and told me he wanted to go out one day. anyway fast forward, he would constantly send messages and never call me and everytime I asked him to call me when he has time, he said that he would but, never did and would continue to send text messages saying hey to see how i was doing but, never picked up the phone to speak to me. On  a few occasions he would send me messages at 12 and 2, and in the morning knowing that im sleep just to say hey or whatever. The constant texting was driving me crazy so I finally I told him to either "call or let me go about my business b/c im sick of communicating through text" and he wrote something smart back(trying to be cute) so, I replied back to him and and then he sent a text back and i never responded and havent heard from him. its been 6 months..i think he thought that i was mad b/c of what i wrote which i was at the time. Anyway, I know its a sign to just leave him alone.. i dont even know why im thinking about this dude but something tells me to call or text him anyway to see whats going on. I really liked this guy and it seemed like we made a connection. What type of connection? I do not know but it seemed like we had a lot in common. He kept saying he wanted to be friends and kept telling me that he was a nice guy..(which I did believe at the time) it seemed like i made him nervous at times when I did talk to him in person..do you think hes playing games or is just shy..should i text or call him to see if he responds or let him be and leave him the hell alone? I never knew what his intention were with me and i still dont know besides him stating that he wanted to hang out and be friens...i just dont want to contact him and then regret it later.
14 Comments Post a Comment
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973741_tn?1342346373
Sweetie, don't back down now just cause you're lonely.  You knew then that this 'thing' was headed no where and he wasn't being very respectful or into you.  You made a boundary and were clear.  He didn't live up to your expectations.  I think you did the right thing.

Now you feel a little loney and weak and the strong feelings that he was not being cool before have dulled a little and you consider texting him again.  Yes, you were irritated with him.  Go with it, stick with it, and don't move backwards.  

If you desire a guy in your life, put yourself in a position to meet someone nice that you can be more on the same page with.  good luck
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Avatar_m_tn
LMAO, I'm not lonely at all and I don't desire for a  guy in my life.If I meet a nice person and we're on the same page and he's cool then fine but, I don't "need" a guy.

Yes, I believe he was disrespectful to me so I cut off communication. I'm not lonely or weak and my intentions were to actually call him when that situation happened to clear the air and to see the intentions but i never felt that it was worth my time or was it a priority to do so, so i backed out of the situation.

I dont know if he was into me or not. I can't tell you that. I've had guys before who would constantly call or come to me with only one thing in mind..to get "in to" me not to get to know me. This guy however is the opposite of other guys ive known..so i can't honestly tell you what his intentions are/were unless I feel like its worth my time to figure out.
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Avatar_m_tn
I meant to say that his actions are opposite of guys ive dealt with in the past..whose intentions were for one thing..
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973741_tn?1342346373
Well, I just think from what you describe, I'd let sleeping dogs lie and not worry about this one.  good luck
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Avatar_m_tn
And what is that suppose to mean?
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973741_tn?1342346373
Well, if he isn't contacting you and you don't want to rekindle anything with him, then I would just leave it alone.  Let sleeping dogs lie is an old saying I guess.  Sorry for not being more clear.  

I would just let it go.  

good luck
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Avatar_m_tn
That's okay. Honestly I would like to rekindle something with him just to see if it would go anywhere but, @ the same time I dont want to. So, im going back and forth w/ my decision. Just because I call or text him doesnt mean he's going to respond anyway. It just lets me see the situation more clearer He hasn't contacted me b/c he thinks that i'm mad at him from what I said..I don't regret anything that Ive said to him.
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973741_tn?1342346373
I understand being in a situation in which you aren't sure what to do.  I think that I would think back on when you were in contact with him, how frustrated you were.  You made it clear what you thought was appropriate and what would make you happy.  And he didn't follow through on that or go for it.  He just doesn't sound like a guy to match what you want from what you've written.  I doubt anything has really changed from how he handles things in the past 6 months.  

In all honesty, I'd let him be and not get back in touch and make a plan for how you can meet new guys to choose from.  good luck dear!
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Avatar_m_tn
I understand what you're saying and I agree..and trust me Ive been making plans on meeting new guys for sometime now..lol Just b/c I'm thinking about calling him doesnt mean its going to go anywhere. There's definitely more fish in the sea I can tell you that.

I just never been in a situation where I wasnt sure on what to do. My intuition usually tells me what to do and this time its not telling me anything.
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Avatar_m_tn
I just want to update: so I had someone look him on FB for me to see if i could find him and come to find out his status says MARRIED. I dont know if hes actually married or he just has that just to have it up therre b/c there isnt much on the page but it says married and theres a pic of a baby on there..i knew he had a kid but there is a pic of a baby on there (thats not his kid) and i dont know if its his but im assuming so b/c who has a profile pic of a baby who isnt there own child..i feel so hurt b/c i feel betrayed but deep down inside i knew something was off with him even though i did like him..i just feel hurt b/c its like he came across as a nice guy and we seemed to have a lot of common at the time but when he started to text me in the middle of the night and only just text me in general and not pick up the phone i knew something was wrong
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Avatar_f_tn
I don't understand why You would feel "hurt" or why You would feel like pursuing this on FB - it's been almost a year.  You're putting WAY too much feeling into something that occurred so long ago. It wasn't going the way You wanted in the first place so I think You should distance YourSelf from the whole situation.  
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Avatar_m_tn
I deleted his number.  I don't talk to him anymore. I feel hurt because he lied to me.. The way it all played out hurt me (I'm not revealing all the details about what happened between him and me) I'm over it.... I'm just giving an update
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Avatar_f_tn
Glad You're over it and ready to move on 'cuz it doesn't sound like He was being honest with You.
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Avatar_m_tn
He wasn't. Even when he was suppose to meet me somewhere or call me back he would say that he would but wouldn't. He would lead me on. We weren't even in a relationship but i can only imagine how he would act if we were. I'm just glad I have closure now. I'm just disappointed b/c every time i meet a guy it's bull...Now I sort of have a guard up and scared about the next guy I meet b/c the men that I've met recently were losers
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