boyfriend with a kid

[mandy8]

My boyfriend is 22 years old and has an 3 year old son. I'm 18 and i been dating him since i was 17 its been 7months. I been having a lot of trouble trying to accept that he has a kid. You might say im immature i know im not the most maturest person ever. I don't need anyone saying stuff like grow up i know that already im just here to have advice on how i can change. I'm willing to change so i can't be that immature. I don't like the person i am. Its very akward for me though hes 22 and having my boyfriend a daddy yeah its weird i feel like im with an old guy or something and if i do marry him it scares me because i won't have all the first with him like first to be called daddy but then again i might because the baby is austic and can't talk.  But im never going to have him say " im going to be a dad" because he already his and i don't like it but whatever. He only sees the baby on saturdays and thats some saturdays its most saturdays but its not evey week all the time. On saturdays i try to go over i been over a few times and i just stoped part of the reason was because he payed more attention to me than the baby and i  think he should pay attention to the baby and another reason is because it was to akward for me. The kid is very cute hes adorable. My boyfriends mom i don't think likes me to much because im not 100% understandable about it. I made this post because i need advice on how can i change things to become better at understanding and be there without it being so akward for me? is there anyelse in my sitituton. If i was in my 30s then its different but remember im still in highschool im a senior and im 18. Eveytime he sees the baby now i get mad if he talks to his ex girlfriend (the babys mom) i flip out. I always say stuff like why does your pass problem have to be bought into tis relationship. I don't mean it its just i get angry and i don't know why i feel bad this is why i need help on to how to change. Te first 3months i was fine with it and 100% understandable i think what changed it is when he cheated on me with his ex girlfriend (the babys mom) i did 4give him but it was hard but he did admit to it and he said he was sorry. I ignored him for a while but he tried so hard to get me back. He called me that night at least 50 times it sounded like he was crying i just kept hanging up but then he came to my job with flowers, a card with a letter and cocolate and i did forgive him because obviously it showed he did care. But now I need help i don't want any bad comments i just need positive advice please. How do i go over when the baby is there and not be so akward about it? Is the first things like him saying " im going to be a daddy" if i do marry him a big deal?  Does a baby remind you of your pass like my boyfriend baby does it remind him of his ex girlfriend is that why he could be there? because she said she doesn't care if hes there or not she won't sue him. One time he did tell me that before me met me the only reason why he had feelings for his ex girlfriend when he was with another girl was because the baby always bought back memories he said its not like that with me because he really does love me but how can i be sure? I just want to overcome this i want to be the girl whos there for my boyfriend and the baby and i want to someday love the baby. Is it hard to love your boyfriends baby with some other girl? and also going off topic here im just wondering this because a friend of mine did bring this up that if the ex girlfriend said i don't care if your there or not im not going to make you pay child support is there a chance it might not be his kid? Because wouldn't she want as much money as she can get from him? She did cheat on him a lot of times and the baby looks nothing like him now. When my boyfriend was a baby i saw baby pictures of him then him and the baby looked a like but now they don't and i heard babys can really look like anyone. I just need help no bad comments please im just looking for advice on how to make things better.

[AHP84]

I think you should refer back to the comments you received in this post you made about your boyfriend and this situation.

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/show/595698?post_id=post_3280279

All the best to you.

[jo929]

Mandy I read your forner post,also this one, and i really feel that you are not ready to make a commitment, you need to finish your education and date some other guys for awhile, and make sure he is what you want, remember he married young, and is still young, and maybe he needs to grow some also  do you have plans to further your education, good jobs are hard to come by unless you really have a good education, also does he have a good education, if not maybe he may benifit from more, so that he may hold a job, let him sow his wild oats,, then maybe he will settle down, and you will know just what you want do not rush into something you may regret you really are to young to be tied down now  luck  jo