fed up and not sure what to do

[mybabypayton]

I dont even know where to start ... im 23yrs old almost 28 wks and have been with my boyfriend for 7 years hes 27 and he just has not been very supportive ..keeps telling me to suck it up and stop being so dramatic when im in pain and when I tell him things I cant eat or do he just laughs and says thats b.s and that I need to stop worrying about everything that it will all work out .. this is my first child and I feel so very unprepared for this as ive never really taken care of a baby before and he just doesnt want to learn anything says well figure it out as we go i cant even get ideas on names from him as he just says oh we still have plenty of time to decide ... and its just so hard to get excited when I just get belittled,disapointed, and put down constantly !. Its hard enough not crying all the time expesially with all these extra hormones and  he doesnt even want to feel baby kick or talk to her.. or take ten minutes out of his life to read a chapter in a book im ready that says "for the dads".. he tells me not to lift heavy things and then expects me to just grab cases of water ect and put them in the cart if I dont he rolls his eyes and says w.e and laughs at me .. I just dont get it and am scared he wont be the supportive birthing partner I need him to be and with the lack of interest he shows towards learning about our babys growth or how to help them develope ect its hard to consider things will not be 50- 50.. and its so hard when he still hasnt botherd to ask me to marry him after 7 years and the fact im carring his child ..really feeling un importnant and unwanted.. feel like I should just leave him but the caring me     thinks about how that would affect our child and after this long I wish he would just step it up and be more of a better man and not make me feel the way I do .. anyone else going through this ... ps: sorry for going off on a ran but I just needed to get that out !

[mybabypayton]

Thanks!ive been considering ewhat everyones saying ans hope things will  .  Improve  .  Or else I will take action and leave as I wanna be a role model for my daughter.

[snopek33]

You just explain my marriage (know divorced since ddaughter was1) i was 24 with first baby). I am 31 know and pregnant with a 21 year olds baby (he was in the marine though so he is very manly. The same stuff happened to me at age 24 that u r going through.  When i had the baby i was in hospital for 3 days didnt see him once. I even caught him shaking my baby. Life to short go with your gut instinct. Do u think he can change. Yes 7 yrs is a long time but will u and your baby be happy and safe with him. Remember u r young there are a lot of other nive guys out there.  I not saying right now but maybe aftet the baby and u gey situated and the baby is older.
If i want to talk or have any questions please i am here for u.
Stick to your guns girl, don't let him run u into the ground. Not healthy. ..

[mybabypayton]

Thanks so much for your insight and I plan to defonitly do some thinking ! And ive had a big talk with him explaining exactly how I feel and how hes hurt me and he seems to have turned around a bit but nothing concreate.. im hoping after babys born he will see what a gem we are and fight for us or else I cant be with him . Id rather be a single mother than try and raise my child in an unhealthy environment.

[thatquietgirl]

Word of advice: It doesn't change.  Most of the time, it does not change.  Do you really want your daughter raised by someone who treats a woman he should be super in love with and respectful after 7 years together like sh*t?  I wouldn't.  He's already showing signs he doesn't care about the baby at all.  No interest in involving himself in the pregnancy, no interest in helping with names, reading one chapter in a book, making you do heavy lifting he KNOWS you should not do because he told you not to, etc.  All red flags.  Do you have anywhere you can go?

Make sure it's really the baby's interest that's keeping you there and that it's truly in the baby's best interest for him to have an active role as a father and not your pride/worry of how it will look having a baby by someone you were with seven years and never married.

Pros and cons lists as well as introspective journaling could be very helpful in this situation.   Look back at how he's been throughout the relationship.  Have there been warning signs of this behavior you were ignoring or lessening or has this really come out of the blue?  On the one hand, it could go completely south.  On the other hand, it might not.  However, answering important questions honestly to yourself will help you make an informed decision.