help me

[dreamboy]

Helloo everyone,im new at this so just deal wit my writing... Here recently i set my girlfriend of nine months up on a chat site.. I got a good friend of mine to get on and chat with her and he did and she agreed to meet with him somewhere.Well i wanted to see if she really would so i got in the car with my friend and we sat there and watched her walk around looking for him. I waited till later to confront her, and at first she acted like she didnt know what i was talking bout then i explained too much in detail for her to deny it so she confessed but said she had changed her mind and wasnt going to meet him.I told her that i think that she was going to cheat but she said she would never do that, even before this she said that and said she knew how it felt to be cheated on and she would never do it to me cause she knows it hurts. Well wat do u think is she a potential cheater or what. Give me some advice please.

[jo929]

you do not give your age, but i think that you are both very immature, and you both need to grow upthe blame should be on both sides  jo

[mami1323]

I think I did say that her actions are questionable. They both have issues because he doesn't trust her but maybe he doesn't for a reason. I think this relationship is doomed.

[Judy246]

Teko, "corner?"...LOL!!!

[megochick101]

Lol teko! I'm with you! First what you did by setting her up is completely wrong! You need to deal with your trust issues and insecurity instead of playing childish game that in no way your gf could ever win!

Secondly, what she did was also wrong! She should not have gone to meet your friend.

Congratulations! You are BOTH idiots! I think you deserve each other, you can enable and encourage her to sneak around, and she can sneak around, what a functional relationship!

Sorry couldn't help the sarcasm lol you are both in the wrong and you both owe each other an apology, and may i suggest some counseling to work on your trust issues?

[teko]

I dont think what you did is any worse than one of us having a background check done on you to see if you are safe to be with. I agree it does say something about your trust issues, but honestly, in this day and age, I think you might have saved yerself a wholelot of grief down the road. Yes, she took the bait, and if she was not considering cheating would not have shown up. I would want to know who I was sleeping with as well. Sorry ladies, I stand alone on this one. lol  Going off to my corner now!

[Judy246]

LOL...I think they deserve each other for playing childish games....let the drama continue...Judy

[Judy246]

it's also good to differ and debate. I can't imagine us all agreeing, that would be boring..that's what these forum are all about to express opinions....it's all good.

[lost_myself]

Funny Judy!!HAHA ...they are NOT Mr and Mrs Smith or the 2 crows from spy vs. spy LOL ..maybe they make a good couple *sarcasm* :)

[Judy246]

BUT...he set up the whole thing by putting her on a chat line. What if (playing devils advocate here), she knew he was doing it to try to catch her and went along with it and is waiting for him to confront her to let him have it (lol)...just a thought to this stupid game. She's no angel, because she responded, BUT what if she knew that is what he was trying to do and went along to mess with him....just thought I'd throw that out there (lol).

[lost_myself]

Im scared to touch this one but, can't control myself (LOL) I have to raise the sexual bias flag ladies..Before you beat me to death..I agree he is a jack off for doing it...period but had this been a gal doing it (the set up) and the man took the bait ..he'd be a cheatin SOB and so and so on you guys would be on the man like no tomorrow if he went meet a potential booty call from the internet. Let's not over look the fact she set up an undercover rendezvous with a stranger while thinking her b/f had no idea. Im sure she didnt go there to tell the mystery man she had a b/f did she? So feel free to call a spade a spade,he was a jerk for doing it but PLEASE *said ever so politely and with the utmost respect* don't over look or excuse her actions as well.......If your gonna call it, call it straight .

[netgal1]

I would agree with Judy you owe her an apology, I think you should do that for yourself and for your girlfriend. Sandy

[Judy246]

p.s...I think you owe her an apology.   Judy

[Judy246]

Ok, I agree completely with the ladies above. You are the one who has the insecurity, mistrust problem,not her and what you have done is wrong!  Plain and simple Wrong! You have "intentionally" sabatoging and setting up your girlfriend and your relationship for failure and to be "caught" for something she has not done. You don't trust her and your fears are causing you to behave unexceptable. You don't do that to someone what you love. If you don't trust her, why don't you simply talk to her and discuss your concerns instead of playing childish games. Communicate not intentionally sababotage someone who has done no wrong.

[netgal1]

Hi by reading your post, I figure you are a very jealous and not so sure about yourself,did you have a bad relationship before and it didn't work out, and now you feel that you can not trust your girlfriend? All I can say is if so get some help on this , how do you think your girlfriend feels, you have probably upset her now.

[mami1323]

imanaddict said it all.  You set it up and she knocked em down.  She may have cheated but she may have not.  It's not good that she did do this but what does that say about your character that you would put her in that type of situation?  You have trust issues with her for a reason.  Perhaps this isn't the first time she's ever did something iffy.  It just sounds very immature on both your ends.

[imanaddict]

If you have to set your girlfriend up because of YOUR trust issues, then this is not a healthy relationship. Why would you even do something like that? There is evidently something missing from the relationship for her to be tempted to meet someone online. I'm not saying what she did was right, but you initially created this mess and then got upset when she fell for the trap. Who knows if she is a potential cheater or not. If this is something that has happened in the past, then you two need to work together on it. Not set her up to fail.