Aa
just a baby daddy rant..
Its almost 12:30 at night he gets off work at 11:30 I force myself to stay awake so we can spend time together we barely get to spend any time with each other I go to school until 3 he goes to work at 3 so ya, no time together.. So I force myself to stay awake and he goes to a party. I'm so sick of this. Every time he gets a day off he goes with his friends, or to a party, and I've already been thinking he's cheating and he goes to this party and is all getting cute and spraying cologne all over himself.. I'm so sick of this. When does family come before partying.. When will he want to come home and relax with me??? I wanted to spend as much time as possible before my baby girl gets here cuz its gonna get harder to have one on one time but it seems to me its more stressful now than in the future. And what if this is all he wants to do when she's here.. I can't take it. All his friends hate me and I no longer have friends. I have nobody. I'm so sick of feeling this way....sorry I just had to get this off my chest..I don't have anyone else to talk to so of course I turn to an app... I'm feeling so pathetic..
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi there. This is sad and I'm sorry this is the way it is. I agree with you that he probably shouldn't be running around with friends and not being with his family. Right now that is just you but soon enough, that will be you and your child.
While agree that all need to have their own friends and you'll be better off to have some good girl friends you can talk to and hang out with, that is in my opinion not the issue here. It's more about someone that is soon to be a father that loves to party and be with friends on his off time rather than settling down into a life that is more conducive to family and babies.
I'm not sure how you solve this issue. I would communicate with him. Not so much like where 'hey, you have to hang out with me' but more 'honey, I'd like to be a real couple and to think you enjoy spending time with me." And after the baby comes "what kind of father do you want to be? One who spends time with the family or one that is off running around with friends?"
When I married, my husband and I were very independent. We enjoyed a lot of things together but also had our own friends and interests. I had no problem with my husband going to a sporting event and then out with friends or to a card game with buddies on Friday night as I just did my own thing. However, I was confident he was a my husband and interested in our being together. I never feared cheating or that he was picking anyone including his guy friends over me. Once we had kids, I asked him what kind of dad he wanted to be and it was a very meaningful conversation to him. From that point on, he was around much more. He still might go to a football game or something but he is spending quality time with all of us daily. So, it is no big deal.
That's the problem, it doesn't sound like you are getting any quality time with him.
Was this pregnancy unplanned and how long were you dating beforehand?
While agree that all need to have their own friends and you'll be better off to have some good girl friends you can talk to and hang out with, that is in my opinion not the issue here. It's more about someone that is soon to be a father that loves to party and be with friends on his off time rather than settling down into a life that is more conducive to family and babies.
I'm not sure how you solve this issue. I would communicate with him. Not so much like where 'hey, you have to hang out with me' but more 'honey, I'd like to be a real couple and to think you enjoy spending time with me." And after the baby comes "what kind of father do you want to be? One who spends time with the family or one that is off running around with friends?"
When I married, my husband and I were very independent. We enjoyed a lot of things together but also had our own friends and interests. I had no problem with my husband going to a sporting event and then out with friends or to a card game with buddies on Friday night as I just did my own thing. However, I was confident he was a my husband and interested in our being together. I never feared cheating or that he was picking anyone including his guy friends over me. Once we had kids, I asked him what kind of dad he wanted to be and it was a very meaningful conversation to him. From that point on, he was around much more. He still might go to a football game or something but he is spending quality time with all of us daily. So, it is no big deal.
That's the problem, it doesn't sound like you are getting any quality time with him.
Was this pregnancy unplanned and how long were you dating beforehand?
I think you need to work on having friends again. I don't know why all his friends hate you and why you don't have any friends yourself, but when your baby comes will be the perfect time to reach out to other moms of babies. Everyone's looking to connect to other moms when they have a child - and that will give you some perspective.
He can't be your only adult friend in the world. You need more.
He can't be your only adult friend in the world. You need more.
Thanks girls, I just feel like I bottle it up and I want to flip out but the words don't come out :/
Why couldn't you go along to the party as well?? I personally wouldn't put up with at, and I really hope for your sake it's not a sign of things to come. Having a baby is a huge responsibility and you will need his help, and yes, you will find having time alone together almost non existent when your baby gets here. If this is happening all the time you definately need to speak with him.
Let him know ur done with his crap and u want him home somtimes being a Bi**h helps it makes them know having a child aint no Fu**n choke :/ goodluck girly♥
I would suggest talking to him one on one if you ever get the chance. I know you're really upset, I would be too. But I also notice you love him and want him to go out and have fun without seeming like the obnoxious gf. But yes, he should be wanting to be at home spending time with you regardless if you're pregnant or not. Good luck :/
Don't feel pathetic we all are here for support. Now as for your man he needs to grow up. Sadly he won't change if you don't tell him how you feel and if you have yo threaten to kick his *** out or something like that. You deserve better
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