not being a liar

[kioks]

i have this problem of lying. have been observing with a deep concern and found it has become an habit. i cant make a straight conversation. am afraid that sometimes I ant complete a sentence without lying. what can i do?

[Judy246]

A compulsive liar has fears of being judged if he speaks the truth.  A person who lie's is hidding something , dishonest and not to be trusted and you have to start retraining yourself start with the self. This is a start to realize that you do have a problem and if it continues, it can ruin you and people will stay away and not trust you. It will effect your reputation, so you have taken the first step, by realizing that you have a problem that needs to be addressed or it will destroy you. Start with small steps, courage and  start to speak only the truth. You want your word to be honest and sincere. If you don't know something they simply say, I'm sorry, but I don't know. You must change this behavior, because the only person you are going to be hurting and damaging is yourself.

[teko]

When you have someone that lies to you constantly soon you will realize that you  really never knew the real person  and move on. No one wants to spend time with a liar. There is simply no other option is there?

[Amie635]

My ex was a compulsive liar and it did a LOT of harm. We were together a while but I got sick of his constant fibs about small day to day things and big important things that I had to end our relationship. Over a year later, he is still convinced he is in a deep depression over his loss of me. The last phonecall I answered, he lied about having a brain tumour. I haven't had a conversation since.

Don't let your lieing get out of hand. You have to put yourself in the situation of others and see how it causes so much hurt for other people. It may seem only a problem to you, but in the end it really does drag a lot of people in. Try to think of the possible implications of lieing if you carry it on - loss of friendships, relationships, lack of trust

You need to get to the bottom of why you lie, what is wrong in your life making you lie? Is it unfulfilling, are you jealouse of other lifestyles, do you not like yourself? Think back to when you first started lieing, why was it? Maybe by making a change to the things that could of possibly caused you to lie will inturn tone down your lieing.

Imanaddict is right, it is going to be a very long road, as it has become a habit, almost an addiction - and thoughs are hard to beat. When you make something up did it fill you with excitment at first? You should try councelling and changing your lifestyle. Keep in mind that your goal is to stop this, and work at it. Everytime you want to say a lie, stop, think about it and remember how easily it could spiral out of control. Then stop yourself. Obviously at first you wont be able to stop, but you can build up slowly but surely till you finally tell little to no lies.

Maybe talk to someone your lieing has affected to understand how it is for other people, or a sympthetic friend to encourage you. Once you set goals for yourself and acheive them - you'll feel great. Always remember you can do it if you put the hard work in.

[imanaddict]

I have an ex friend who was a compulsive liar. I couldn't deal with it so I ended our 16 year friendship. She would lie over things that didn't make any sense, like about how much money she made or the title of her job, or how much she paid for a pair of jeans, etc.

Have you ever been to counseling for this? Why do you feel the need to lie, and what type of things do you lie about? I'm glad you realized that this is a problem and want to fix it! It will take some time though and you will have a lot of work to do. When lying becomes a habit, it's a hard cycle to break but it can be done. The next time you feel compelled to lie, stop yourself. Remind yourself that you are working on turning a new leaf and then blurt out the truth. This will be a process so don't give up!!