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relationship trouble before due date
So just looking from advice from someone maybe in similar situation. I'm 35 weeks and found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. I am completely heartbroken. Will never trust him again and do not believe he loves me and our baby girl. He wants to be there when she's born no matter what. This is my first babh. I do not think I would want him in there with me.. Someone who just betrayed me while I am going through labor.. But if we ever get back together which I dont know if it will happen I will probably regrer it. And I dont really have anyone else except my friend to be my coach. I don't know what to do.
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi there sweetie. So very sorry that he did this and especially so since you are about to have his baby! Really hurts to be cheated on and betrayed like that. Ugh, why do people make such dumb choices in life??
Sadly though, you can't let this affect his relationship with his daughter. Yes, HIS daughter. No matter what goes on between the two of you, he is the parent of your child and he will need a relationship with her. Not just because he wants one but because SHE needs one.
Once you have kids, you'll notice--- everything changes. It's no longer about 'us' and becomes about the kids. We have to sacrifice things including our feelings for the greater good of their feelings.
It's in your daughter's best interest to know her dad, to bond with him, to spend time with him whether he was a cruddy partner, cheating partner, bad partner to you. You and he can be done but he can't be done with the child.
If he wants to be there, let him be there. Do it for your child. maybe not at delivery if that is too raw but at the hospital to begin bonding with his child. Your child. The person that you will son bleed for when they are sad. And shell be sad if she doesn't get to know her dad.
I absolutely agree that you shouldn't stay with him if he is a cheater. But that is totally separate from being a parent.
I know this is hard and probably not what you wanted to hear. But your daughter is going to want to know this man. Even if you wish you didn't anymore. Good luck. Motherhood is really hard sometimes. peace and hugs
Sadly though, you can't let this affect his relationship with his daughter. Yes, HIS daughter. No matter what goes on between the two of you, he is the parent of your child and he will need a relationship with her. Not just because he wants one but because SHE needs one.
Once you have kids, you'll notice--- everything changes. It's no longer about 'us' and becomes about the kids. We have to sacrifice things including our feelings for the greater good of their feelings.
It's in your daughter's best interest to know her dad, to bond with him, to spend time with him whether he was a cruddy partner, cheating partner, bad partner to you. You and he can be done but he can't be done with the child.
If he wants to be there, let him be there. Do it for your child. maybe not at delivery if that is too raw but at the hospital to begin bonding with his child. Your child. The person that you will son bleed for when they are sad. And shell be sad if she doesn't get to know her dad.
I absolutely agree that you shouldn't stay with him if he is a cheater. But that is totally separate from being a parent.
I know this is hard and probably not what you wanted to hear. But your daughter is going to want to know this man. Even if you wish you didn't anymore. Good luck. Motherhood is really hard sometimes. peace and hugs
You deserve better sweetheart. This is suppose to be a very special time in your life. If he can cheat while your carrying his child he isnt worthy of your love. Let go and let God.
He has no right to be there.. I had my last by myself and you will have nurses there, you don't need a coach. You will be upset going through labor with him there knowing what he did. If he did it once he can't be trusted and will probably do it again. You do not deserve to be treated that way.
Congrats on the baby!!! Ok so on to the boyfriend issue. Yes you should have him in there to witness the babies first breath of fresh air. Anything you have going on with eachother doesn't have to.include the baby. Try to resolve that once the baby comes and everything calms down. If you can't trust him consider that when making you final decision on if you're going to stay with him or not. The baby is precious and I know you don't feel like dealing with him and his foolery but its his baby too and right now "Baby" should be the ultimate priorit. Good luck :-)
He cheated on you and needs to learn his lesson. I would not give him what he wants because he will think its okay to walk all over you. I would tell him that you are not comfortable with him being in the room and he can see his baby after she is born. I can't imagine being in your situation but you need to be strong and stern.
I'm going through something similar. I'm 33 weeks and not with my baby's dad. After I found out I was pregnant I also found out that he had never really left his previous girlfriend. Since then there has been multiple girls in his life. He's a player and I'm the stupid one who got knocked up by him. He insists on being in the room for delivery I really don't want him to be, he makes me sick. I know how you're feeling right now.
Now of all times* then he will do it again and you'll never be able.to trust him!! have your friend be there and make his *** wait to come.until after.
I wouldn't let him near me or my child. I'm in a similar boat. My husband is pining for his ex, but didn't bother to come to our first OBGYN appointment to find out if his baby had a heart beat or not, and this is after we miscarried.
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