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2021096 tn?1328921005

serious question need advise

Me and my fiance have been together 2 years, for the first year of our relationship he cheated, 3 times, either actual cheating or talking like he wanted to have sex with someone else, and since he has quit i have become more angry then normal, i seem to always be mad at him. we were wanting advise on swinging. he thinks it would help our relationship, i dont know much about it, but i would like some stories or advise on this subject please and thank you.
7 Responses
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Avatar universal
Life360 and RL make a GOOD point.  

Definitely "food for thought."
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
OMG don't do it,there are so many STIs around and you don't need that type of lifestyle.Just be with the one person and have a decent relationship.
Helpful - 0
3149845 tn?1506627771
Hi Manda, i had to read your post a few times to relate to it. Before you consider the swinging path, please go to the STD, Herpes and HIV forums. Society and nature has shown us that this behavior has consequences. These forums are some of the busiest with MedHelp. Gonorrehea, Chlamydia and Herpes seem to be at an all time high. These diseases are passed back and forth between people and you dont want to end up one of the posters on any of these sexually transmitted disease forums.
After you read some of the panic and anxiety of these poor souls, i truely believe that your swinging question will be answered.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
He hasn't "quit" cheating (your word, not mine) if He wants to "swing".  "Swinging" is an opportunity to cheat without having to hide and lie about it.  Why have a boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife if one wants to "sleep around"??

I too find this degrading and certainly not Behavior for a Mommy.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
TOTALLY agree with the above posters.

"we were wanting advise on swinging. he thinks it would help our relationship...."   WHAT?  

Is this guy worth all this headache and nonsense?  It is obvious he is ONLY thinking about himself.  

Swinging would mean you would be WILLING to sleep with other men and he can sleep with other women while you two are in a relationship.  Would you be ok with this?  

I find the "swinging" idea TOTALLY disgusting and degrading.  

Do you have babies with this guy?  Oh heavens if you do.  I saw you have three children.  Parents "swinging" is no good example IMO.  

I would recommend you END things with this "so-called" bf and be on your own.  
Helpful - 0
973741 tn?1342342773
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi there.  Agree with remar.  I don't think frustration, hurt, sadness over infidelity in the past will be helped by infidelity in the future (which swinging pretty much is, cheating with consent from your partner).  

Do you really want to be with someone else?  Do you really want your partner to be with someone else?  

I think your partner is basically asking for a free pass and unless you are willing to share him, sadly, I think that this relationship may be not worth continueing.  If you feel just fine having sex with others and have no problem with your boyfriend doing it, then I guess swinging would be alright for you.  (use protection against std's though).  

I personally would not be happy with a boyfriend like this.  good luck
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I can only give you my opinion. I think if you get in to swinging it could very well ruin your relationship. I think you will become even more angry with your fiance. Have you asked yourself why he wants to cheat? Are you willing to marry someone you can't trust? If you want to try and save your relationship talk to your fiance about couples counseling. Getting in to swinging in my opinion will not save it.
Helpful - 0
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