think I married the wrong person

[confusedb]

I have been married for about a year and a half and after 6 months of being married things were going down hill.  we were together for 5 years before getting married so it not like we jumped right into it.  At frist I thought it was a comuication porblem and her lack of any ambition and unsocial behavior.  But now I am thinking maybe I made the mistake of being with someone you want to change.  I have always complained about how she is not social around my friends cann't wait to leave soon as she gets there.  I have asked here to work on this maybe i was wrong to ask this.  But now a year and half of being married we get along together we don't fight to much and i do love her but i am not happy with.  A few months ago we had talked and i told here that i was thinking about a divorce and we talked for a while and things were good for  month or so.  Now things are back to the way the were and I am thinking maybe i made the mistake.  Its hard to say i don't hate you but i don't think we are right together after almost 7 years together.

[confusedb]

well we have talked about things that would make me happy or thing that bug me about her that she dose not like to go to or do.  And she well compromise for a while then fall back into her old ways. We go to a party of some of my friends that i dont see to often and an hour ready she wants to go.  I want to go out to go get something or out for a night some place she dose not want to she complains the whole time make a reason we cann't go or plays sick.  I have tried going places without her but she keeps texting me while i am there and gets pissed if i don't respond when i am ignoring her.  And I don't feel right when she dose not go and i have to make up things why she is not there.  She is a homebody and I am also a bit but I can only take so much till I have to get out.  I have asked her to change her ways but I think this is were I went wrong by tring to change her.  Just realizing this to late.

[mami1323]

This baffles me, you knew her for 5 years before you married her, not one time out of those 5 years did you think about maybe taking a step away from the relationship because she did not meet your needs?  Why did you get married to her if she has been like this for the entire time you were together?  There are issues with her that you can work through, the relationship can be fixable.  It's not that she is unfaithful or abusive or has a drug or alcohol problem.  It is a matter of likes and dislikes and compromise.  She has to want to do things that she may not be so comfortable with if it's something you like and vice versa.  For example, my fiance is not a fan of Broadway shows, however, I want to see In The Heights and he said he will go because he knows I want to see it.  He's into Body Building and once or twice a year I go with him to the shows.  I can live without it but I chose to go because he loves it.  This is part of marriage, part of relationships.  It's what we do so we can live together in harmony.  You can chose to give and take or you can chose to go to these parties without her.  But is it really worth divorcing over?

[pbbsmommy]

Well  I think you should tell her the reasons why you aern't happy to be with her for the rest of your life and She'll understand more if you talk to her and maybe you guys can comprise and work out something. If you aren't happy with her then go through divoce.

[confusedb]

As stupid as it sounds it almost feels like I know i love her but she dose not make me happy enough to want to spend the rest of my life with her.  She keeps asking if it was her or something she did but its not atleast not that i know of