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what to do now?
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what to do now?

Ok so last night my husband who I have a child with and am 22 wks pregnant with our second was arrested for csc that happened a yr before we were together. He didn't know she was under age and now we are put it a very bad situation. I still love him and am standing by him as much as I can but I also have 2 daughters from my 1st marrage that I'm scared I could lose if he is convicted I know he will never hurt them or do anything to them and I'm scared of losing this baby or him missing the birth.
11 Comments Post a Comment
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973741_tn?1342346373
Oh my, this is terrible.  have you looked into the charges because when I google it, it says that second degree csc with a minor is when the minor is between the age of 11 and 14.  Was the girl this  young?  

If so, that is a character issue on behalf of your husband whether you knew him then or not and would indeed make me as a mother a little nervous about him being in the house with your kids.  And it could cause your ex to absolutely go for custody.  

I would ask to know all the details and try not to let your biased of knowing him enter the picture.  If he admits to underage sex ---  picture someone doing that to your daughters.  Feel that emotion and apply it to him.

I'm not trying to be hard on him but that is just the situation.  It is not very many adults that would take the steps of having sex with a very young teen and it would worry me about not knowing who this man really was deep down inside.  

good luck
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3149845_tn?1386354841
Hi as specialmom says, there are degrees of this. You should try out exactly what he is being charged with so things can be put into perspective, like who made the complaint., I take it that there was a warrant out for him and he was picked up. According to law he is presumed innocent till proven quilty and even at the, the court system leans toward plea barging to a lessor charge to avoid costly trials if there are mitigating circumstances. Get get a public defender if you cannot afford a lawyer and speak with them about the options.
Please let us know how your doing.
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Avatar_f_tn
I'm not sure of the degree but he was in his early twentys and she was a later teen who she lied about her age and her parents are the ones upset as far as I know.
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973741_tn?1342346373
How many years ago was this?  
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973741_tn?1342346373
Dear.  You need to look up what first, second, third and forth degree csc entails.  None of it is good.  The oldest she'd have been for him to get charged with that is 16 unless she is special needs.  I'm afraid that this is a tough one to brush under the carpet.  You aren't saying that he says he didn't have sex with this person-----  so he is admitting it.  And the csc charge indicates that he should have known that she was underage regardless of what she told him.  

I would be very concerned and you really need to learn what first, second, third and forth degree is and where he fits into this.  good luck
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480448_tn?1403547723
I agree with SM...you need to find out all the details.  Did you know about any of this before he got arrested?
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Avatar_f_tn
I know the degrees and how serious they all are all this happened over 8 yrs ago. He admits to dating her but not to having sex with her. I know all the women hes had sex with which is only a couple.
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973741_tn?1342346373
Hm.  Well, if he is only charged and there is no evidence to support this, then there should be no worries, right?  Just either hire a lawyer or use a public defender.  

Problem is, when we are talking about a 20 year old with someone that is 16 or less which has to be the case for him to be charged---  and he claims he didn't know . . . .  well.  I'd be rightfully angry if a man in his 20's was messing around with my 16 year old child.  

That's kind of what you have to deal with.  A backlash of the public.  

This is really hard and yes, I'm sure it has turned your home upside down.  

I guess deal with each thing in steps.  He has to deal with the legal situation.  If he is innocent (which he's not saying----  he's just saying he didn't know she was underage . . .  ), he needs good representation.  Get that lined up.  Then you'll have to go from there.  If you have no problem with what he did----then you'll just have to deal with outsider's perception.  You may have to work with your own lawyer if your ex has a problem with this (and he very well could.) to help you with custody things.  

One day at a time is all you can do.  

I would be bothered by a csc charge and a sex offender status following my partner to be honest.  I do wish you luck.  This is a tough one.  
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3149845_tn?1386354841
If this happened 8 years ago, when was the arrest warrant issues 8 years ago? So how to they arrest him now, they just found out where he lives? *8years is a long time to bring a case of this nature to trial. Is it only now that the charges were brought against him, 8 years later?
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3149845_tn?1386354841
Also i just read that the statue of limitations on csc offence 1-3 is nine years and 4-5 is 3 years and that DNA evidence must be collected and preserved. The charge is now being at 8 years.
Something very fishey about this whole thing.
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13167_tn?1327197724
I'm not sure about it being fishy,  but it sure is confusing!

RSMom,  could you just post how old was she,  how old was he,  how long ago was this,  and in what state this happened?

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