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How long does it take Chlamydia to form Epididmyis
Greetings:
I am simply trying to put together the best time frame I can regarding my husband's affair and infecting me with chlamydia. He met a nurse while running a fire medical call August 2009 (I was at home with our first and only child of 9 months). He said she performed oral sex on him at the fire station he was working at 2 weeks after meeting and that was the only physical contact at that time (lie sure). No condom was used he said it was like 5 minutes long. He does have a large penis piercing a barbell that goes from top to bottom of the head of his penis. Then 2 weeks later he was staying at a hotel to do a ridealong with a police department in her area to see about transfering from fire to police and she came by his hotel. He said she again began oral sex on him this was about 2 minutes long then asked if they could have sex he magically had an old condom packed and put it on but said (lie) after putting it on he went limp which he thinks was guilt in the back of his mind. He said with the condom on while limp he still tried to force his penis in her but it wouldn't work so she practically ran out of the hotel room saying this has never happened to her. He said this was the last time he ever saw her but they still randomly had late night text messages from September - December. Based off the phone records I can see he stopped texting her (they never spoke on the phone based off phone records after September 2009) after late December. January 25 his testicle swelled and he went to the ER on his way there I used the internet and figured out he had Epididymis and confronted him while waiting the lobby of the ER that this comes mostly from Chlamydia. He denied and showed me some impossible to understand lab printout saying it was a result of ecoli not chlamydia but still I hammered and hammered him. He actually had sex with me the day his testicle swelled knowing it was swollen and hurting but didn't say anything to me. A week after the hospital he told me he got labs back it was ecoli and it was cleared up and ok to have sex so we did again. Then for whatever reason the following week while running a call at a 24 clinic he spoke with the Dr. there and was retested again??? A week later they called and said he had chlamydia he tried to tell me it was some bird form which would be respiratory not what he had. So he tried to get me to take his meds which I refused without going to my Dr the next week. I did in fact have Chlamydia and was treated for it. It took a month but he finally slowly confessed to the one time oral sex, a month later after my digging found out it was a twice meetup a month later after my digging saw the phone records. So my question is if he was in fact one of the people that chlamydia did show symptoms I saw he was looking up chlamydia symptoms early January 2010 when he didn't get the testicle swelling and go to the ER until Jan 25 2010 and I was tested Feb 8 2010 and positive but had no symptoms at that time. So if his story is he last saw her September 23 2009 but January 25 2010 his testicle swelled as a result of epididymis as a result of chlamydia which I understand if you are in the group of people who will develop symptoms they appear 1-3 weeks after becoming infected. If that is the case the last time he saw her being September 23 would not be accurate. Also he took the penis piercing out finally after his Dr. said although it is rare for oral sex to be the transmission but if that is all that he did with her that his large penis piercing is like a constant sore opening for bacteria to thrive and it would put him more in the category of oral sex being a method of transmission. What are you thoughts of the transmission being just from oral sex and his last time seeing her being September and coming down with epididymis and other chlamydia symptoms in January 2010? Thank you this thought has been constantly bouncing around in my head daily for 4 months now!
I am simply trying to put together the best time frame I can regarding my husband's affair and infecting me with chlamydia. He met a nurse while running a fire medical call August 2009 (I was at home with our first and only child of 9 months). He said she performed oral sex on him at the fire station he was working at 2 weeks after meeting and that was the only physical contact at that time (lie sure). No condom was used he said it was like 5 minutes long. He does have a large penis piercing a barbell that goes from top to bottom of the head of his penis. Then 2 weeks later he was staying at a hotel to do a ridealong with a police department in her area to see about transfering from fire to police and she came by his hotel. He said she again began oral sex on him this was about 2 minutes long then asked if they could have sex he magically had an old condom packed and put it on but said (lie) after putting it on he went limp which he thinks was guilt in the back of his mind. He said with the condom on while limp he still tried to force his penis in her but it wouldn't work so she practically ran out of the hotel room saying this has never happened to her. He said this was the last time he ever saw her but they still randomly had late night text messages from September - December. Based off the phone records I can see he stopped texting her (they never spoke on the phone based off phone records after September 2009) after late December. January 25 his testicle swelled and he went to the ER on his way there I used the internet and figured out he had Epididymis and confronted him while waiting the lobby of the ER that this comes mostly from Chlamydia. He denied and showed me some impossible to understand lab printout saying it was a result of ecoli not chlamydia but still I hammered and hammered him. He actually had sex with me the day his testicle swelled knowing it was swollen and hurting but didn't say anything to me. A week after the hospital he told me he got labs back it was ecoli and it was cleared up and ok to have sex so we did again. Then for whatever reason the following week while running a call at a 24 clinic he spoke with the Dr. there and was retested again??? A week later they called and said he had chlamydia he tried to tell me it was some bird form which would be respiratory not what he had. So he tried to get me to take his meds which I refused without going to my Dr the next week. I did in fact have Chlamydia and was treated for it. It took a month but he finally slowly confessed to the one time oral sex, a month later after my digging found out it was a twice meetup a month later after my digging saw the phone records. So my question is if he was in fact one of the people that chlamydia did show symptoms I saw he was looking up chlamydia symptoms early January 2010 when he didn't get the testicle swelling and go to the ER until Jan 25 2010 and I was tested Feb 8 2010 and positive but had no symptoms at that time. So if his story is he last saw her September 23 2009 but January 25 2010 his testicle swelled as a result of epididymis as a result of chlamydia which I understand if you are in the group of people who will develop symptoms they appear 1-3 weeks after becoming infected. If that is the case the last time he saw her being September 23 would not be accurate. Also he took the penis piercing out finally after his Dr. said although it is rare for oral sex to be the transmission but if that is all that he did with her that his large penis piercing is like a constant sore opening for bacteria to thrive and it would put him more in the category of oral sex being a method of transmission. What are you thoughts of the transmission being just from oral sex and his last time seeing her being September and coming down with epididymis and other chlamydia symptoms in January 2010? Thank you this thought has been constantly bouncing around in my head daily for 4 months now!
Obviously this is a complicated situation for you that has caused you a lot of pain and heartache :( It sounds like you are both following up appropriately to help work through this and get you better answers as well as work on your problems in general. Sounds like this fellow is damn lucky to have a woman like you!!
can he have gotten chlamydia from only oral sex? It happens but the risk of it is pretty low. i think having a general disbelief of his stories is far better than blind faith in his honesty from the sounds of things. Having herpes as well as wounds in his skin from infected piercings does put him at higher risk for std's in general. Certainly both of you do hiv testing again too at some point just to err on the side of caution.
hang in there - this is a lot to handle in general.
grace
can he have gotten chlamydia from only oral sex? It happens but the risk of it is pretty low. i think having a general disbelief of his stories is far better than blind faith in his honesty from the sounds of things. Having herpes as well as wounds in his skin from infected piercings does put him at higher risk for std's in general. Certainly both of you do hiv testing again too at some point just to err on the side of caution.
hang in there - this is a lot to handle in general.
grace
Simply because it has not been reported often enough to be considered a high risk means of transmission....And I can tell you fro personal experience that I performed oral on the guy who gave me chlamydia and I DID NOT have it orally. No one said it WASN'T a means of transmission...just not a likely one.
I am also a divorcee of a cheating husband and from what I am reading, you are having a hard time coping with the situation as it is. The point is that you know he cheated. You know he has not been completely truthful. And deep down you know that you may not ever know the whole truth. As Grace said you will never be able to figure out who gave what to whom and when. All you are doing is letting this situation consume you. Both you and your husband should just get tested, treated (if necessary) and then figure out where to go with your marriage from here.
I am also a divorcee of a cheating husband and from what I am reading, you are having a hard time coping with the situation as it is. The point is that you know he cheated. You know he has not been completely truthful. And deep down you know that you may not ever know the whole truth. As Grace said you will never be able to figure out who gave what to whom and when. All you are doing is letting this situation consume you. Both you and your husband should just get tested, treated (if necessary) and then figure out where to go with your marriage from here.
2terrified - how certain are you about the transmission from her giving him oral sex not being a means of transmission? It's such an easy question yet so many Drs clam up when asked this. They always respond with yes it's possible but it's not all that likely. Then when I add in about my husbands very large 2 hole piercing in his penis they say well that does change the odds quite a bit from very unlikely to more of a possibility. The girl he was with knew he was married was also cheating on her fiance for whatever reason and after my husband told me of the affair and sent her an email telling her he got this from her from the oral sex she performed she snapped back with a response of this is your problem you shouldn't have opened your mouth I'm not getting involved with anything with you or your wife and by the way you are wrong on your dates it was August. So that sorta I hope gives me a little more faith in this was just oral sex not that it changes anything except for the fact that he might actually be being honest with me now in regards to discussing his regrets. But she did also mention that she doesn't think it was her b/c she had new sexual partners in December and was tested and came back clean and that her and her fiance were actually kinda on a break when she was with him and in October they recommitted to each other and she broke things off with Jimmy after that. Yet, my phone records show them texting at least 6 times a month for hours late at night. My husband claims it was a result of both of them being at work and working odd hours him at the fire station and her at the ER and she would text him if someone from his department came in and that then would start other random conversations. He says she even sent him pictures of her new ring and she texted about the details of their wedding and he would tell her about ours so strange to me, to strange to be true....
I did get the "full sha-bang" of testing done. Coming into the relationship I already had hpv which is the one that causes the cervical cells to mutate and possibly turn to cancer or clear up on it's own so far mine seems to have cleared up for the past few years. When we first began dating I was the aggressor sexually and rushed that b/c of the intense feeling of being connected after our second date I told my mother I found the man I would marry I just felt it. So needless to say within 2 weeks we had sex the first time a week after we had sex I became very ill and went to a 24 doc in the box clinic and as it turns out he gave me genital herpes, chlamydia and gonnorehha! We both were treated and all but the herpes cleared up. Prior to being with him I had not been with anyone for 6 months and he had been with AT LEAST 3 other girls within 3 months of moving here to Ga from Ca. But we worked through it and remained together. After he was told his epididm... was a result of having Chlamydia they put him on antibiotics and retested 3 weeks later and he was clear. I went to my dr the day after he found out he had it and was tested and treated even before my results were back. I was retested 3 weeks later with negative and then again just out of fear I was tested again 2 months after with negative results. With most cheating relationships it's rarely just that one issue going on in the relationship so we have a mountain of issues. He began therapy a week before finding out he had chlamydia for rage issues stemming from years and years and years of extremely heavy steroid abuse and is on all kinds of medication for his testosterone issues now that he has been off steroids for a couple years and his body is unable to regulate itself which causes ups and downs in his moods. Prior to cheating I was considering divorce just b/c after having a baby I realized I couldn't take care of his ups and downs and mental issues and a new baby which also contributed to him turning to another woman for emotional escape and avoidance of looking into a mirror and working on himself to work on the marriage. It was easier for him at that time to just assume I was just a ***** who he wanted but just hated him for who he was and not a result of his mountain of issues. So he was in therapy and after trying to come partially clean he begged me to go to his therapist so we had a few sessions together and now I have just started seeing my own therapist and he is seeing his therapist and in the future once I decide where I am at with what I want to do about staying or leaving the marriage we will try joint therapy sessions with both or therapist for couples. His therapist is sending him to a psychiatrist b/c she feels he is Bipolar type 2 with severe depression as a result of severe self hatred. Just before cheating he began taking antidepressants for his rage issues which now his therapist is switching saying his general dr shouldn't have put him on that type of med and then there will be more meds to treat the bipolar if he does have that. So yes we are doing the therapy stuff overkill in my opinion - his therapist, my therapist, church counselors (we just started church last month), and 2 online affair recovering paid workshops. I have 100% trust that he is not currently cheating he wishes he never did cheat and that he has looked 100% in the mirror but the fact still stands he is in my opinion not a horrible person but a troubled person with pathological lying issues and it's not as much as what he did in the past as it is the details he still today currently lying to me about. I can't wrap my mind around how he has already admitted (after I had the google dashboard search history of looking for hotels in front of him from his phone) that they attempted sex and she had oral sex with him twice which is just awful and I am still here and married to him but he still to this day refuses to admit he did have sex with her and the limp story is just him trying to put himself as a victim in some sort of twisted way. I mean he won't even admit to kissing her???? I just don't get that he can admit to oral sex but not kissing that is so bizarre to me. My issue is with the current lying to me today about it which in fact still makes him an unchanged liar today. I know this site is for STDs and with this reply I have totally gotten off the path of that but my emotions are still running high trying to sift through things to get the details of what really took place and what I am really trying to forgive my husband for. Thank you for your responses you have no idea how much it helps to have people listen and respond with their own comments. I really do appreciate both your responses. I find it so hard to buy the I just got chlamydia from oral sex too! I mean I know that was his biggest complaint b/c I never performed oral sex on him but like maybe 10 times in a year for our relationship but that is b/c I have a small mouth and that barbell that goes all the way through his penis like a tongue ring top to bottom was awful in my mouth and not to mention its like an open sore that never heals and sometimes like all other piercings ears eyebrows and so forth dead skin cells and microscopic gunk can get trapped in there and form well you know gross ick even if you can't see it sometimes its just an off smell and it just disgusted me but he resented that I didn't appreciate it like his other conquests did. I always asked him to take it out and I would do that more but he never would until his dr told him that if he rec'd oral sex and now has chlamydia and his piercing being such a large one thus providing more opportunity for transmission of things like chlamydia. So he finally took the dang thing out. It also didn't help that when he was having fits of rage and saying horrible things to me about how we never have sex (b/c he was on such huge highs and lows I never had time to recover from the lows and rages enough to be okay with being sexual with him which then would throw him into another rage) I would retaliate with hurtful things like as he would walk out the door to get away from me I would shout if your leaving and your going out to cheat on me please tell her to me a favor and suck your stinky dick so I don't have to hear you whine about it all the time. I guess that didn't help issues much.
You know he's been lying to you. Cover your bases and have BOTH of you get full std screenings which include herpes testing too.
You really can't narrow down when he would've contracted chlamydia as far as figuring out just how many lies he's told. Doesn't matter anyways. You know he's had at least 1 other partner. Protect yourself and follow up with the full testing.
Have you discussed going to a marriage counselor to work on this?
grace
You really can't narrow down when he would've contracted chlamydia as far as figuring out just how many lies he's told. Doesn't matter anyways. You know he's had at least 1 other partner. Protect yourself and follow up with the full testing.
Have you discussed going to a marriage counselor to work on this?
grace
My thoughts? All lies trying not to make the situation seem any worse than it already is. Unfortunately, there is no way to prove anything. There is no specific time frame for epid. to start but relatively, he would have to have had it for several months. And chlamydia the least likely std to transmit orally.
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