20 years of careful sex followed by a week of insanity.

[asiapilot]

Hello.  Thankyou for allowing me to post my question.  For the past 20 years I've been so careful and now 10 weeks ago I lost my mind for a week.  I had unprotected sex with a girl i met at a party the same night.  Then I had unprotected sex with a girl I had met at a bar three weeks prior the following night.  I've been celebate for years.  To make matters worse I fly to Asia from North America twice a month and I had protected sex with a prostitute but right before I came the condom broke.  After all three I went and urinated and poured disinfectant on my penis.
The insanity of it all is staggering.  I can hardly believe it was me.
Approximately four weeks later I developed a brutal cough that hung on for two weeks, went away, and has been back with me for the last two weeks totaling five weeks. I cough up a lot of phlegm.   Two weeks into the cough I went to the Doc and after a blood test was shown to have mononucleosis.
Three days ago I went to another Doc because my cough won't go away and he asked if I've been tested for HIV.
Now I'm terrified.  I can't eat, sleep  and I'm afraid to get tested.  I've been responsible my whole life and now I might have thrown it all away .
What are my chances?

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Despite the potential high-risk exposures you describe, the statistical odds are pretty strongly against HIV.  Your doc undoubtedly is being conservative and careful; in today's world, most health care providers would routinely test for HIV in any patient with unexplained symptoms like you describe.  It doesn't necessarily mean he has a high suspicion.  Anyway, enough time has gone by to rely on the test result.  (You don't  say whether or not you went ahead with testing.  In any case, you an expect a negative result.)

Maybe we have flown together.  In the past month I have been to Bangkok and back and Japan and back on (on UAL).  But mostly I drive a 182.

Good luck--  HHH, MD

[ryn21]

The doctor will add that the chances of HIV transmission from a single sexual encounter are around 1 in 1000.  Did you mention your encounters to your doctor, thus being the reason for his reccomendation of an HIV test?  Phlegmy coughing lasting a few weeks could be related to an upper respiratory infection or mononucleosis as your doctor has confirmed rather than HIV. Symptoms mean nothing, the only thing that you can rely on is the test.  Most people who show symptoms have other minor infections or illnesses rather than HIV.  I would put it out of your mind or at least try to and just get tested.  The results could ease this unnecessary anxiety.  Its the only thing that can put it to rest.

[gotherpeslifeisover]

Out of curiousity..where does this 1 in 1000 figure I keep hearing come from? I'd like to see proof of that.

[asiapilot]

thankyou for your kind words.  I'm a wreck right now.  I didn't think anything of this cough for four weeks until the second dr. asked if I had an hiv test.  It was a cold slap in the face.  I did a lot of research on the internet and,yes,  I probably just have mono, but the fact that I could have hiv is devestating.  I haven't slept in two days.  Haven't eaten.  Can't go to work.
My sister, a nurse , told me five years ago that male / female straight sex is impossible to transmit the virus.  Unfortunately for me I believed her.  I had no idea what a urethra was or that it could receive the hiv virus.
I will get a call tomorrow with the results.  I buddy of mine will answer the phone.  I can't do it.

[ryn21]

As the doctor has said, doctors are often conservative and make cautious decisions such as to test for HIV in an ill patient in many circumstances.  Yes, HIV can be transmitted through strait unprotected sex.  I really wouldnt worry too much until you get your results back.  The odds are in your favor.  To add, your anxiety/not eating/not sleeping will cause you to feel sick or make you even more ill than you are.  As hard as it may be try to relax and wait for the results.  Good luck.

[asiapilot]

thankyou ryn21.  Your caring words give my heart some warmth and for that I am truly grateful.  The world needs more people like you.  I talked to my roommate at length last night and we agreed if we both had more love and care in our lives we wouldn't feel the need to go out and find it in such a desperate suicidal way.
I was losing my grip on reality later on in the night my buddy made me go get some calming drugs before I had a heart attack.
If the good lord sees fit to get me through this I am truly a changed man.  If not, I guess I am changed anyway.

Thankyou ryn21 , I guess you are an angel.

[Imdumb]

I am betting you will be getting good news on the results today. Let us know. There is little chance you got HIV from this. I am rooting for you!!  Be well.

[svc]

Don't be so worried about the lingering cough.  There is a super strong strain of bronchitis/virus going around and everyone I know who has had this cough since September has told me they have had it for at least a month.  I had bronchitis for 10 weeks starting in September, coughing up a lung every day, and I am definitely not HIV positive.  The fact that you have mono is enough reason that your body will have a hard time fighting a cough as well.  You immune system is not functioning at par at this time.

...try a little emotional intimacy with a woman next time.  It won't leave you as stressed afterwards.

[asiapilot]

gentlemen,

thankyou so much for your warm thoughts and wishes.  I just got my test results today.  Your prayers and well wishes may well have been the deciding factor.  I am hiv negative.  Thankyou so much.  I am forever in your debt and through God's good grace I hope to pass on the good spirits.

God bless you gentlemen

asiapilot