Could rough sex bring on a primary OB?

[sparklestar]

I have just been diagnosed with genital herpes.

I stupidly had unprotected sex a few weeks ago. He was rather rough with his fingers before intercourse, and I felt very sore the next morning. In particular, where he had rubbed me around my clitoris. I had a very sore area, where it almost seemed he had rubbed some skin off. A few days later I was still sore in this area, and when I had a look I had a blister. This was followed by a couple of other red spots/blisters in the same area where he had made me sore. Four days after this, I felt really unwell with a fever, aches, and stomach and back pains, and a couple of days after that I developed lots of really sore ulcers around the anal area, along with pain in my rectum. The culture test was positive for genital herpes. My GP said it was a really nasty attack.

My question is - is it likely I caught this off this man? It seems a coincidence that he made me so sore in the area where the first blisters occured...and could it happen this quick?

The last time I had sex before this was a couple of months ago, in a relationship that lasted a year. My partner never had herpes as far as I am aware (no obvious symptoms anyway), and I have never had any symptoms of herpes before. Could it have lain dormant for a few months and been activated by rough sex with this new man?
I am desperate for some clues as to who I caught it from. My previous partner wants us to get back together, which I would like very much (we were having a trial separation)....but how the hell can I tell him in the meantime I have caught genital herpes???
I would really appreciate your help. Many thanks

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

You describe a classical story of first-episode genital herpes; in fact, it probably is a true primary infection, that is your first-ever infection with either HSV-1 or HSV-2.  The vigor and trauma of the sexual exposure probably had nothing to do with in.  (Well, maybe a little.  Herpes probably has to be massaged into the skin for infection to take hold.  But it doesn't need such vigorous massage to cause soreness.)  Your onset of real herpes symptoms was "a few days later" when you saw the first blister-like lesions.

Since this almost certainly is your first infection and not a recurrent outbreak, you can be almost 100% certain you caught it from your new partner.  If that person is unaware he has herpes, he needs to see a health care provider familiar with STDs and a blood test to confirm his infection.

I hope your GP treated you with an antiviral drug, such as acyclovir, valacyclovir, or famciclovir.  If not and you're still having active, painful lesions, call and insist on a prescription immediately.  If you are on treatment, your symptoms should be improving.  I also hope your positive herpes test included determination of virus type.  The prognosis for recurrent outbreaks in the future, and the likelihood that you will be able to transmit it to future sex partners, depends very heavily on whether you are infected with HSV-1 or HSV-2.

For further information, read the herpes article in the link "STD Quick Facts and Articles" on the STD Forum home page.

Best wishes--  HHH, MD

[TriciaAS]

I also have genital herpes. It really sucks, doesn't it.
I had unprotected sex with this guy that I didn't know very well. I started having symptoms the next day. I had about 20 lesions all around the outside and on my labia.  It hurt like an S.O.B.! Unfortunatly I gave this to my husband. He had lesions the next day with a fever and a sore throat.
The first exposure is always the worst. Then when you get an outbreak, it's only one at a time.
You definitely got this from that guy.
As for telling your boyfriend, you may not have to tell him, you can go on medications so you'll only have an outbreak once a year.
I've had this for 5 years now. If you have any other questions, don't hesitate to ask.  I don't have anyone to talk to either about this problem. good luck

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Thanks to TriciaAs for the insight from an infected person.  Among other things, you correctly imply to sparklestar that even if she turns out to have recurrent outbreaks, most people with genital herpes can learn to live with the disease.  However, everybody with recurrent genital herpes, or with genital herpes caused by HSV-2, has an ethical obligation to tell future partners of their infection, even if they are taking antiviral therapy.  Treatment does not prevent all transmission.

But if there is a lucky side to sparklestar's story, she'll turn out to have HSV-1 rather than HSV-2.  About half of new genital herpes cases are caused by HSV-1, acquired by oral sex.  Most people with genital HSV-1 do not get frequently recurring disease and have much lower risk of transmission to future partners.  That's why it is important that she learn what virus type she has.

HHH, MD

[sparklestar]

I don't know which type I have, but am going back to the clinic next week, so I will ask about that. I just hope it is HSV1. I am on Acyclovir, 200mg five times a day for five days (finishes today). I've not developed any more sores, but the ones I have don't seem to be getting any better, they are so painful and I still feel unwell. This is a nightmare!! I feel like nobody will ever want me again.
Thanks very much for your help, I'm really glad I found this site

[cuaco]

Hi, your comment that you feel that no one will want you again has spurred me to write.  My husband gave me herpes after 3 yrs together, he never told me he had the infection until I became infected, as he had very rare mild outbreaks and was unaware that he carried the condition.  Unfortunately the relationship broke down for different reasons and I too felt that no-one would want me especially as I have frequent outbreaks, at the moment about once a month (usually 4 times a year, but I have had some stress recently which seems to make a difference), however I have met a really nice man whom I told about my status very early on before we became intimate, to him it made no difference and we are happily together.  We take precautions so that he is less likely to become infected but he is prepared for the worst and thinks I am worth the risk! Personally despite having frequent outbreaks the condition in itself is not much to write home about, a minor inconvenience and as time goes on (4yrs) the outbreaks themselves are hardly noticable or painful and the sores themselves dissapear quickly, I hope that this is some comfort to you.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

When you return to your GP, discuss the possibility of continuing acyclovir in a larger dose (e.g., 800 mg 3 times daily) or switching to valacyclovir (Valtrex) 1 gram twice daily.  The incomplete response may favor the possibility you have HSV-1, which is somewhat less responsive to antiviral treatment than HSV-2.  So maybe it's a good sign!  If your virus wasn't typed, by the way, you'll need blood testing to determine that.  If these things seem to be byond your GP's knowledge, consider a second opinion at a GUM clinic.   (I'm guessing you're in UK or a commonwealth nation, judging by some of your terminololgy and syntax - and UK GUM clinics offer among the best STD services in the world.)

Your feelings are typical, but truly most people with herpes get through it and find that they still can be wanted and loved.  Hang in there.  Check out the American Social Health Association (www.ashastd.org), where you can find the phone number for a superb (although not toll free)  herpes help service.  My guess is that there are similar services in the UK.  Or look up the International Herpes Management Forum (IHMF), which might list similar services in other countries.

HHH, MD

[ts21218]

hi. I'm glad to have come across this site. I had been dating my boyfriend for almost a year when we had sex without using lubrication.  My vagina was so sore, and it seemed as if my perineum had been torn. The pain was excruciating, and I hated to urinate because of the burning. Originally, i believed that pain was just due to the "cut", but it became unbearable. My symptons not only included the "cut", sore groin,back pain, and just a overall sick feeling. I went to my doctor, and was examined. She wasn't completely sure what was going on, but took blood as an extra precaution. A few days later, I received a call with a prescription for valtrex. I was so confused.  I didn't know whether the rough sex without the lubricant had caused an outbreak, or if i got it from my boyfriend.  We continued to have sex, and he never displayed any symptoms.  This was in Feb of 2005. We broke up in November and had unprotected sex right before Christmas 2005 with no problem.  We had sex again a few days ago, and I received a call from him saying that he had swollen lymph nodes, and a burning sensation when he urinated.  I'm not sure what is going on. I don't know if we are passing it back and forth now, or what. But now that we are not together, i feel that if he does have it, i might as well not be with anyone else. THIS SUCKS!!!!!!!