Genital - Oral Transmittance of STDs

I had safe sex (m/f) but also unprotected cunnilingus, french kiss and fellatio with a risk-partner some weeks ago. My libido was stronger than my brain. Stupid.
No symptoms in the genital area but sore throat, difficulties in swallowing and headache after some days, a few days later, after therapy with Roxythromycine swollen lymph nodes for some weeks now. No further symptoms like lesons in mouth or on lips at any time. I also didn´t recognize apparent lesons at her.
I don´t expect a high probability for a STD but as my spouse now has the same symptoms, I am a little bit anxious and have some questions on it.

Are there any STDs that are transmittable by cunnilingus or french kissing to the male part and cause oral or pharyngal diseases and swollen and hurting lymph nodes for a longer period? At what risk or probability?

Which of those can be transmitted (oral - oral) to another person (spouse) without any sex or other intimate contact, like french kissing e.g. to cause the same oral symptoms. Just by using the same spoon or glas or breathing and coughin?

Maybe there are some experts that can answer my "exotic" questions.
Thanks a lot...

[gracefromHHP]

odds are your sore throat and headache were a non-std related viral infection. they are very contagious and easily transmitted through kissing others.

no reason to think this is a std going on.

grace