Welcome to the forum. I'll try to help. You obviously have learned a lot about herpes in general and HSV-2 in particular, so I won't try to make any general educational comments but will go straight to your questions.
1) People usually are immune to new HSV-2 infections, once one part of the body is infected. For that reason, the large majority of auto-inoculations (self infection of a new area of the body) occur during the initial infection, before immunity has developed. Although there is a theoretical risk you could auto-inoculate your genital area, the chance is very low and I wouldn't worry about it.
2) You say nothing about your initial infection, but if it involved only your finger, the odds are strong that no other area of your body is infected. If not, there is little or no risk of transmission except from your finger.
3) Probably a finger cot would provide a high degree of protection. I cannot say whether or not it is total protection.
4) No risk. People with HSV of either type are immune (or at least very resistant) to catching the same type again, anywhere on the body.
5) To my knowledge, there has never been research into asymptomatic shedding of HSV-2 in relation to whitlow. If there is any risk of HSV-2 transmission the way you describe, it probably is very low -- maybe no risk at all in the absence of recurrence of the whitlow.
6) Probably just a neglible risk, maybe none.
7) Valtrex would lower whatever risk there is. Whether it makes the risk zero, I cannot say. I suggest you inform partners of the potential risk, then let them participate in decisions as to whether to use that hand in sexual contact. But it seems to me it should not be difficult to limit genital contact with partners to the uninvolved hand plus your genitals and mouth. With that precaution, there should be no risk of transmission.
Best wishes-- HHH, MD
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