Herpes prevention & Oral Sex

My partner has genital herpes, I don't. We're still sort of working out the specifics of risk prevention; Specifically right now I'm trying to nail down the oral sex issue.

I know it is *possible* that I could contract herpes if I went down on him when he doesn't have any symptoms; but how *likely* is it?

Is this likelihood lessened if he is taking suppressant medication? that is, I know that suppressant medication lowers a person's outbreaks, but does it also reduce their asymptomatic shedding, too? Significantly? He is not too interested in taking suppressants because he doesn't get outbreaks anymore, and doesn't see the value (but if they do more than suppress outbreaks, surely there *is* value!)

Which medications would be good options for this?

If he agreed to take suppressants only on days we'd be together, would that be effective as a treatment or does the medication need to build in your system to work? any possible side effects from this?

Thanks everyone!

[gracefromHHP]

I encourage both of you to read the herpes handbook at www.westoverheights.com. It will answer most of your questions I think.

Also check out our herpes forum. It's all herpes all the time over there :)  We also have a everything you wanted to know about herpes but were afraid to ask health page here on medhelp too for more reading.

grace

[gracefromHHP]

Sounds like your bf doesn't realize that a lack of ob's doesn't mean a lack of risk to a partner. Daily suppressive therapy would reduce your risk significantly regardless of the sex act.  If this is a choice you two make - I'd be really vigilant to make sure he's really taking his medication though since it sounds like he thinks he doesn't need to do so. If he doesn't take it as ordered, it won't work to protect you.  He needs to take it all the time, not just on the day you are together and planning on having sex.  

grace

[anne_bluebell]

hi grace! thank you for writing :) He definitely knows that a lack of ob doesn't mean a lack of risk, but i don't think he's convinced that suppressive therapy helps with anything but ob. but it's good to know that it also will help with the shedding. i'll pass that on. He's  not on any sort of medication at all right now, and hasn't been for a while.

i'll definitely check out westoverheights.com. i know i should just talk more openly with him about stuff, and i always believed that if i were to be in this position i would be completely forthright, but i guess i'm less brave then i thought i was all along. :P