Welcome to the STD forum.
As for your possible genital warts almost a decade ago: Most genital HPV infections clear up on their own within a year or two, and do not recur. The high-risk (cancer causing) HPV types don't cause warts; and the wart-causing types generally don't cause cancer. Having had several sex partners in your life, probably you have indeed had one or more high risk HPV infections; most people get them at one time or another. But with your wife's normal pap smears, this also isn't a concern. Your probable past HPV infection(s) probably have long since been eradicated by your immune system. At this point, there probably are no risks to your or your wife's health. This isn't something to worry about at this point in your life.
1) Oral HPV infections are uncommon, and mouth contact rarely transmits the virus. Transmission of the genital HPV strains by kinds of contact with saliva like you describe has never been known to happen.
2) Despite the media attention to oral cancer and HPV in recent years, this remains a rare problem. There are only around 6,000 HPV related oral/throat cancers per year in the entire US (i.e. it is 10 times less common than AIDS); and it is not certain whether those HPV infections resulted from oral sex or some other route. HPV is not a reason to worry about oral sex, with or without abrasions or any other oral health problem.
3) No, definitely not. Genital HPV is not transmitted except by sex.
4) There is no conflict or dispute. Here is a quote from another thread, which summarizes the knowledge about HPV persistence; we have said the same thing many times on this forum: "It is possible that all HPV infections persist indefinitely, at some undetectable level.... Some HPV biologists believe such persistence always occurs. However, the infection becomes undetectable with all available technologies, typically over several months to a year or two. Once it becomes undetectable, infection rarely reappears and probably cannot be transmitted to partners. So for practical purposes, the infection is completely resolved and can be considered cured."
5) "Do you have any thoughts or insights to easy my mind?" Yes, I do. Stop worrying about it. Getting genital HPV is a normal consequence of human sexuality. Not desired, but normal in that it happens to almost everyone. Happily, the large majority of infections clear up (within the limits of our ability to detect them) and never cause any important health problem.
Questions like yours are common on this forum. Entering "oral HPV" in the search window reveals 600 discussions and "HPV persistence" shows over 300. Please scan them for more information.
Regards-- HHH, MD
I recently found out that I was positive for hpv so went on line and did sum reserch. Now I'm really worried! Can I pass hpv to my child if we drink from the same cup, straw or if we share food? Since I have hpv and me and my long time partner keeps having sex and he has it to will it ever clear up on it own? Should we stop having oral sex?
Thank you for "The high-risk (cancer causing) HPV types don't cause warts". I have been wondering about this for years. I got a genital wart years ago. I am glad I cannot pass something on to my wife that could potentially harm her.
Thank you, Dr. Hansfield, for taking time to reiterate previously stated points and addressing my questions!