Possible STD, but which one???

I figure I should give u a history of my recent sex activity & any symptoms I've seen/experienced to better help with a diagnosis.
Have had 2 sex partners for past 2 mths (husband & other). Had unprotected sex with other partner about 3 weeks ago & then w/ hubby about 4 days after that. I was very "dry" when I had sex w/ other partner & also w/ hubby but we used some lubricant (still wasn't optimally moist). This is my history, and now for the symptoms: about 3-4 days after hubby & I had intercourse I started noticing a thick white discharge from my vagina & it was painful/burning whenever I peed. Sometimes the discharge was watery & yellow/green in color. I didn't notice any foul smell. Symptoms lasted about 3 days. Haven't seen any bumps, felt any other kind of pain, etc. Seem normal now. As for hubby, he got a small tear after oral sex because his skin was too dry & around the same time got a "pimple" on the skin of his penis midway between the shaft & tip. Both were scabs for a bit which he used Neosporin on but the pimple scab came off while showering and then looked like an open waxy red wound. (He got the pimple about 4-5 days after we had intercourse) Small (maybe red) bumps formed near where he got the tear  (maybe from Neosporin?) The tear healed & bumps are now scabby. Open wound doesnt look moist anymore & looks like it is healing well.
I went to a gyno last week, did a pap, tested for Trich, chlam/gono. Results were negative. But I had microscopic hematuria & gyno said my inside looked a little irritated (maybe from sex week before?) Hubby got checked today & they also found microscopic blood in urine. Did a whole std blood test so won't know the results for a couple weeks.

ANY idea what this could be?? The doc told him the hematuria could be due to kidney stones because he is susceptible to it, but what are the odds we both have it?? I need a peace of mind so as much information will be helpful. I apologize for details.
Thanks in advance!

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

I'll try to help, but I cannot settle anything with certainty.  You have been burning up several community forums for the past 3-4 days with variations on the same questions.  I didn't take the time to read all the responses, but on quick scan, some of them gave you accurate advice, although others did not.  (It is not true that almost "any bacteria" can cause bacterial vaginosis.)

Most genital symptoms in women are nonspecific.  In other words, the identical symptoms can occur with several different infections, including STDs and non-STD infections, and by various non-infectious problems.  There often are clues based on odor, itching, and the nature of the vaginal discharge, but these are only clues and don't ever allow definite answers.  For this reason, the detailed symptoms usually don't help much in knowing the diagnosis.  That you have had more than one sex partner certainly raises the strong possibility of an STD, but seeing a health care provider and being examined and tested is the only way to sort out something like this.  

Unfortunately, as you hav found, even professional examination and testing doesn't always give clear answers, at least not right away.  Modern gonorrhea and chlamydia tests are very accurate, so you can be pretty sure neither of those is the problem. The common test for trich (just looking under a microscope) misses many infections, so trich remains possible.  Herpes is always possible, and your husband's penile pimples, "tears", and scabs make herpes seem a good possibility.  On the other hand, most STDs don't cause hematuria in either men or women.

The bottom line is that I cannot explain your symptoms.  Herpes seems a definite possibility, however.  If that's what you have, it sounds more likely that you caught it from your husband, not from your other partner.

All I can suggest is that you and your husband continue to follow up with your health care providers and work with them.  In addition, it would be wise to ask your other partner to be examined.  All of you should discuss herpes testing with your respective providers.  If any of you have an open genital ulceration or sore, direct testing for the virus can be done; otherwise, blood testing is the way to go.

I hope this helps.  Best wishes--  HHH, MD

[paranoidspouse]

Thank you for your rapid response, doctor. I REALLY appreciate it. My gynecologist wasn't in today, and the nurse wasn't able to answer my questions, so my thoughts have just been running wild.
Just to be a little more clear, hematuria can be caused by herpes, but not likely other STDs (except maybe chlam/gono but I tested negative, so we can rule those out)?? Is that what you're saying?
If it is herpes, how long can it be before I get any sores? Is it possible to have it and NEVER get any sores/blisters/bumps???
What should I look for with the current symptoms my husband has?

Thank you again.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

I didn't say herpes causes hematuria.  Just the opposite; I said that STDs generally don't cause it.  (It could happen, just not typical for any STD.)

Many people with herpes don't have overt, easily recognized sores or blisters.

My main message to you is that further speculation is pointless.  You may never know for sure what's going on.  If a diagnosis becomes clear, it will be through the passage of time (with possible new or changing symptoms) and/or from more complete diagnostic testing of all three involved persons.  You're never going to work it out by online searching or through an online expert, no matter how knowledgeable s/he may be.

[paranoidspouse]

Just needed a way to ease the thoughts a bit. I know we just need to wait for my husband's results and I need to get my blood tested, but hearing other suggestions/possibilities has helped me not stress out as much and just wait.

Your time and responses are much appreciated.

[paranoidspouse]

Just out of curiosity, what's the reason you suggested herpes and not syphilis?

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Syphilis is much less common than herpes.  There are only about 20,000 new syphilis infections per year in the US and 70% of those occur in gay men, whereas a million people get genital herpes each year. And syphilis generally doesn't cause vulvar irritation or vaginal discharge.  

[paranoidspouse]

Got another question if that's ok.  Is it known why some people may show symptoms, while others don't? In herpes, that is.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

No known reason.  It seems to be random.

That will have to be the last comment on this thread.