Hi, I hate myself to have to come to a point that I have to post something here but I guess I just want to hear someone tell me that I'm just driving myself crazy. I have specifically name myself "stupidsam" cos what I did was stupid ! So here's my story.
I'm a married man with over 10 years of marriage and 3 kids. I have been going through some marital issues in the past few months that have left me very angry and frustrated. As events would turn out I went to a friends party around 2 and half weeks ago (I went alone) as my wife wasn't in the mood to go. I had a few drinks there and was dancing alone and then it was time to go home.
We'll on the way back home i changed my mind (frustration, anger & drinks) bad combo :(. I went an picked up a hooker.
Good thing was that she refused to kiss, or give a BJ and we used a condom. I tried once for about 30 secs but got bored in the middle of it, got off and washed myself, then sat brooding. Then tried again but could hardly get myself to stand and wasn't even able to get inside her, especially as I was wearing a condom, then took that off also. Then brooded some more.
Then i finally told her that i want to get this done and over with, so she should gimme a BJ to make me stand. She said ok but only with a condom. So she did, I stood after about 15 secs of protected BJ and then i had sex with her for about 30 to 40 secs with the condom on.
Then we both got up, she washed herself, I washed myself and went home.
This all happened on thursday night / friday morning.
Everything was fine for 3 days (i was a little guilty but i put it behind me) telling myself that it was a mistake that should not be repeated. I even went to the water park after 2 days (on Saturday) and used the public toilet a few times.
I was fine on Sunday.
Now, monday morning when I woke up to goto office and went to pee, I felt a little pinch at the left side of the tip of my penis just before the urine came out, but no pain or feeling during the pee. Man I got concerned, all sorts of thoughts started crossing my mind and i drank lots of water and monitored my pee the whole day. The same thing was happening, just a little pinch at the left side of the tip just before urination then everything ok.
I monitored myself for around 3 days, now i started feeling a strange / weird sensation at the tip of my penis and kept touching it to see if anything was wrong. I got really worried and went to see a doctor after about 1 week, he did a local check up, no sores, no pus / liquid, nothing. He did a urine test and it was clear, but i think it was a simple urine test.
Then he just gave me a urine alkalizer and said to come back after a few days if symptoms become worse.
I couldn't resist and went to a urologist 5 days after that (all this while the symptoms were the same) although the sensation would completely disappear for hours and sometimes there wouldn't even be that little pinch on the left side before peeing.
But the urologist did a proper physical check up and took a swab sample for detailed analysis (result still to come in), he said the test would take about a week. And he put me on "doxycoline" anti-biotic twice a day for 21 days.
It's been 5 days since the anti-biotic now, and since yesterday the sensation has just disappeared but the slight pinch (specifically on the left side) of the tip is still there just before urinating (but that also sometimes does not happen).
To top it off I had a known history of OCD and clinical depression :) (Yea I'm smiling cos 2 long episodes of depression have taught me that nothing lasts forever)
Thank you so much for replying grace. I'm live in a continuous state of anxiety :(
Yes the the Urologist did a thorough manual examination of my prostrate (i think he looked all over my genitals area and pressed in places to see if it hurt and even tried to push to get any liquid out, nothing came out, so he had to put the swab inside my urethra to obtain a sample, he called it a biopsy).
He couldn't find any abnormality but he did point out to the "left side" of the tip of my p***s. The skin there looked a little crumpled.
He also told me to use panaderm twice a day for a few days at the tip.
I think i've developed heightened penile awareness syndrome.
My tingling is nearly gone since 3 days now, I dunno if its the antibiotic or the panaderm or my mind. I do feel something there but only 10% of the time and even then I just think i'm focusing too much on my senses.
The pinch at the left tip of my p***s has also reduced to about 10 to 20% of what it was.
My skin is as good as perfect all over the genitals areas. I've examined myself many times and asked my wife to examine it also, I told her I think i've caught something from the water park.
I'll be getting the swab results in about 2 days, I'm so darned anxious, aaarggh I hate this feeling.
Oh yes, did I mention the water park and public toilets ? And What i've been reading in the past few days, "Trich" can give people a tingling sensation at the tip, what I was feeling all these days.
I dunno how to calm myself, down, I keep thinking HSV and HIV and then i'm like that's impossible dude, then I'm like Oh my god, what will happen to my family, what have I done !!
I was fine yesterday infact i hardly noticed or thought about this. today im all conscious again and sense that i can feel something at the tip again, then i think its just me rubbing against my underwear.
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