another hsv question

i just want to say thanks.  im new to std stuff and this is a great website.  my story:

im a 30 year old female, not previously sexually active.  in college i had a bf who we had oral sex (cunilingus and fellatio).  never been tested for stds bc there wasnt a need.  now im in a relationship with a man who has genital hsv2 (from a long term previous relationship) and has had oral cold sores since he was a child (assuming - oral hsv1).

my concern is how this can affect me.  in mid september we started having oral sex (cunnilingus only), we have currently stopped this.  my concern is that i could get hsv from him.  in late oct i got tested for hsv - positive for hsv 1, negative for hsv 2 (ive been told it takes 3-4 months for antibodies to show up though so i need to get retested later to see if hsv 2 shows up).  ive never had any sypmtoms for hsv 1, so i dont know how long ive had it or where it is located (oral or genital).

1.  im wondering about the liklihood that he could have contracted hsv 2 oral from having oral sex with his previous gf (who he got hsv2 from).

2. if he did contract hsv 2 oral from her, what is the likelihood that he could have transferred it to me during cunnilingus?

3.  is it true that once you have a type of hsv, it is rare to contract it somewhere else?  so if he had hsv 1 oral, it is highly unlikely that he could contract it genitally (from fellatio).

4.  if he has hsv 2 oral, is it possible for him to transfer it to me orally just by kissing?

thanks for your help.

[rhiannon33]

i wanted to add a bit more info i just thought about.  he has had genital hsv 2 for about 7yrs.  his last outbreak was about 6 months ago, and he wasnt on suppressive drugs at the time, now he is.  his last oral cold sore was about 5 months ago as well.  we dont have ANY contact (oral or genital) while he has ANY sort of outbreak. thought that info might help in some way.

[gracefromHHP]

It's not likely that his hsv2 is oral . Even if it is - studies have shown that for most folks it doesn't reoccur and only sheds about 1% of days.So even if he did by chance have hsv2 orally too - it's really not an issue. His hsv2 genital infection is more of a risk.  

You have hsv1, he has hsv1.  We can pretty safely assume you both have it orally even though you don't recall having symptoms either orally or genitally. I'm assuming you've kissed quite a few folks along the way to finding this man so you most likely picked it up orally somewhere along the way if you hadn't already picked it up as a child ( who remembers a cold sore they got a 2 years of age or anything? )  Err on the side of caution and when he has an obvious cold sore or feels like one might be starting - don't allow him to perform oral sex on you. It's not likely that you'll contract hsv1 genitally with a well established hsv1 oral infection. It does sometimes happen but it's far, far more likely not to happen.

He's on daily suppressive therapy for his hsv2.  That cuts your risk in half making you about 95-96% lkely each year NOT to contract hsv2 from him.  Throw in condoms and you statistically are about 97-98% likely each year NOT to contract hsv2 from him.  You will always be more likely not to contract hsv2 from him than you are to get it but I know convincing yourself of that is easier said than done.  

I'm glad you are still seeking out info instead of just running the other way - herpes is far too common for it to be a real deal breaker. It's something we all should be more educated about instead of fearing it.

grace

[rhiannon33]

could you comment on this as well??  thanks.

[rhiannon33]

thanks so much....thats informative and encouraging.

[gracefromHHP]

This isn't the doctor's site - you have to pay to get them to answer your questions on their site.

grace