One night Aug.10th I gave oral sex (deep throat) to a guy and I swallowed his ***. 2 days after I started feeling nauseous with a headache and super tired and a bit of a fever. Also on that same day I woke up with a cold sore. Throughout 3 weeks I felt nauseous, with fatigue, had fever, headaches non-stop, my tongue felt weird (its texture kind of changed) and was kind of whiteish like when one has a virus. I didn't have sex with him. I only gave him oral sex and thats it.
If I got herpes that night, are these the symptoms i would get when contracting the virus and my body is trying to fight it back? Cause I heard when you get herpes for the 1st time one experiences fatigue, fever, etc. Is this true? Another thing is what if I had HSV 1 already (cold sores) and didn't even know it but he had HSV 2 then passed HSV2 to my mouth, will that make me sick as if I was getting herpes for the first time since its the other kind of herpes? or not because I already had HSV 1 so therefore my body will not respond by getting sick as it would the first time?
The reason why I took this so lightly at first and didnt tell him about him giving it to me was because I did some research and found an article on mango allergic reactions. That weekend I had eaten mangoes. At first I thought I am allergic to mangoes since I read they do cause blisters on those who are allergic to poison ivy and i am! It says Urushiol causes the allergic reaction. As the days passed while feeling sick I realized I wouldnt get sick like this of only a mango allergic reaction so most likely what I thought was herpes IS in fact herpes.
I dont know if the guy knows he has herpes but I was afraid to bring it up because of my uncertainty and also because i dont like blaming it on him (he might dislike me for that) even though it is like 98% sure that he passed it to me or else I wouldnt have had the symptoms of the herpes virus when it first enters the body and it cannot be a coincidence that it was two days after that encounter! I did some research and Herpes symptoms after exposure take 2 to around 20 days to show up. ALL THIS CERTAINLY CANNOT BE A COINCIDENCE!!
Me getting sick after that encounter exactly two days after and getting a cold sore. That's gotta be it. He gave me herpes. Though Im a little afraid there's still the possibility that he could have given me something else as well and thats why the sickness for a long while now. Also i cannot be mean and blame this whole thing on him. I know the possibility exists that I had HSV1 already and didnt even know it and him possibly having HSV already as well. Then when he kisses me it gets triggered because both us have HSV and thats why I got the cold sore for the first time. OR I could have had HSV1 already and giving it to him but it doesnt make sense with my theory and the doctor's theory (i went to the doctor) because then why would I have gotten sick after that encounter. That only means one thing: unfortunately I got infected that night =(
Seriously I'm sure he gave me something!! He could be those guys who are totally asymptomatic and not even know he has it. I read there are a lot people who had herpes for a decade even 15 years and didn't know it! I'm scared i got something from this guy. Please help! would like opinions on this.
I'm going to be very honest with him because honesty is the key to getting to the bottom of this. Im not going to be those who get mad at the person for not saying they had some std. Im very understanding and will not dislike him no matter what.
Yes i agree, too much of a coincidence. He must have giving you something. It fits your doctor's and your theory and of course there are the other possibilities that you mentioned but there are more chances that its the first one. and yes when I got herpes for the first time I got all those symptoms of illness. dont want to even remember how mad i was at the person!! though im happy that you will be understanding because people who have herpes and who do not tell their partner dont say anything because of that exact reason, being screamed at and being rejected. It seems to me you'll never find out who gave it to who. but have this in mind. herpes can be transmitted by sharing infected utensils, razors, shaking hands, coughing, sneezing. Thinking that he gave it to you since you were the one who got sick, if the guy sleeps around then he might have giving it to ya. But if he didnt have herpes and you didnt have herpes he could have gotten it from sharing a drink or shaking hands with his buddies who might be swingers and have stds. very high possibility. also dont laugh but you can get it if you kiss dogs. the dog could of gotten it from someone with herpes then the dog passes it to you or your guy. very shocking.
I dont like sharing utensils so i dont know about that.
u can get it from coughing and sneezing? and from a dog?! christ thanks for the info.
I would like to know if loosing your appetite is a symptom as well. I dont seem to be hungry much and if I eat I can only eat a bit. Im a bit worried about him though. If he doesn't know about him having it or the possibility that he has it, he definitely has the right to know whats going on. There's a big chance that he is asymptomatic and passed it on to me (who is not asymptomatic) and thats how i found out he has it and i have to tell him so he knows he's infected. If he's not asymptomatic, he either didnt tell me or maybe he's had the very mild mild symptoms and never thought of it being herpes.
Oh man... talking about mild symptoms, i just remembered something he told me. Last Spring he said his penis had gotten a bit sore and that now he has a scar there. Probably it was so mild that he didnt even question it. That makes so much sense now. Christ this is starting to make more and more sense. Also I read yesterday that friction causes sores to appear in the shaft so probably when he masturbated that happened or when i gave him a hand job, friction triggered it. Man, this seems to make a lot of sense now. Also that would mean my symptoms of being sick, make sense. If he has HSV 2 then he passed it on to me when I gave him oral and thats why the weird tongue feeling, etc.
I swallowed so does that make it more of a risk of catching stds?
hope this helps everyone who has herpes. I just copied and paste from an article. I'm posting this in many posts.
"Herpes is caused by two viruses -- herpes simplex virus type 1 (HSV-1), and herpes simplex virus type 2 (HSV-2). While statistics vary, research shows that 90% of the population has been exposed to HSV-1, "oral herpes," and 25% of the population aged 25-45 years old in the United States has been exposed to infection with HSV-2, "genital herpes."
HSV-1, the virus responsible for common cold sores, can be transmitted through oral secretions. This usually occurs during kissing, or by eating and drinking from contaminated utensils.
Additionally, HSV-1 can cause genital herpes through transmission during oral-genital sex, thus both strains of the virus may be transmitted by sexual contact. Initial oral herpes infection, however, usually occurs in childhood. It is therefore not classified as a sexually transmitted disease. Parents kissing their child can transmit the virus."
And i got this from another website:
"Severe first episodes may have symptoms that include:
swollen, tender lymph glands in the groin, throat, and under the arms
general run-down feelings
achy, flu-like feelings
How long does it take for sores to appear after a person gets infected?
When there are symptoms, the first episode of herpes usually appears from two to 20 days after infection — but it may be years before the first symptoms appear."
What I know and read: there are people who have the virus for more than 10 years and get their first outbreak after when they're married and then their husband or wife loses trust thinking their partner cheated on them. When in fact is just that all their life they have been asymptomatic and unfortunately some kind of stress triggered it years after. I read a story of a man who wanted a divorce and the woman felt awful because she was telling the truth but he couldn't believe that she didnt cheat. So if you're thinking about your partner cheating on you, I suggest you discard that thought completely because it is not likely the case!!
Be smart. If you have herpes and your partner does and you're completely happy with that person, I suggest staying with him/her. Because think about it. You already went through the talk, both know they have it and you're certain that you're accepted. If you break up then you have to start all over. First of all you're going to lose that great person then you'd have to meet someone again and not only that but go through the talk and all the anxiety that comes from telling them that you have herpes and not just that but there are more chances that you'll go through many rejections which will lead to stress and depression.
And if you're with a partner and choose not to tell them you have herpes, the anxiety is greater when you experience not being able to go to sleep thinking, "I might have infected him/her tonight. He/she is going to hate me when he/she finds out." So if you're partner is infected and you're infected as well, just be happy. What's better than being with someone that's just like you and who understands you completely and is very accepting?
To answer one of the first questions from the first post, I know that you will get those symptoms when the virus enters the body for THE FIRST TIME ONLY and then the body adapts to it. Have you felt cold when you got it? Did you get any chills? I got that symptom when I first became infected.
According to the events and all the symptoms you're feeling, you definitely contracted this virus for the first time and you got infected that night.
Here's some info all should know:
"For people with no prior contact with HSV-1 or 2, initial infection is characterized both by systemic (whole body) as well as by local symptoms and signs. Generalized symptoms include: fever, malaise, muscle aches, and decreased appetite. Local symptoms are described below.
Prior to the appearance of blisters, the infected individual may experience increased skin sensitivity, tingling, burning, itching, or pain at the site where the blisters will appear.'"
To answer your questions:
1) yes decrease in appetite is a symptom.
2) of course, there's a bigger chance. Girls are told that when giving oral sex its better not to get semen on their mouth and if they do, they should spit it out. The risky part comes along when they swallow it instead of spitting it out. During oral sex the giver has more chances of contracting stds than the receiver of oral sex. So this means you were more at risk than the guy you were with.
And this here really answers your last question:
"THE BIGGEST AND MOST IMPORTANT CONCERN WITH ORAL SEX AND SWALLOWING EJACULATORY FLUIDS IS STDs. If any of these people has an STD, they are very likely to transmit it to your mouth. This is an effective route of transmission for many STDs, such as Herpes 1 and 2, Human Papillomavirus (HPV), Gonorrhea, Chlamydia and HIV/AIDS. Many times people who have STDs do not even know it, thereby increasing your risk of getting an STD. The only way to prevent getting an STD is to practice safer oral sex."
So please, next time hun, tell the guy to buy a flavored condom for the safety of both. Hope this helps.
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