I can't tell from your description. Folliculitis wouldn't persist more or less unchanged for more than a year. I suggest you see a dermatologist.
Likewise, I can't say anything about your partner's anal problem. But swellings that hurt, itch, and occasionally bleed after defecation sounds most like hemorrhoids. Since her primary doctor couldn't figure it out, she should ask for a referral to a protologist (rectal disease specialist), who undoubtedly would be able to tell for sure what is going on.
In any case, neither poblem sounds like an STD.
Best wishes-- HHH, MD